Do you ever feel like you are just too old for this shit?!? Too old to tell your story. Too old to make a come back and make it right. Too old to feel this way. I’m creeping up on my 44th birthday and I still cannot find the words to express the horror of my life in particular (and my childhood in general). The words are stuck in my throat, strangling me. I admire people who have killed themselves because I feel like they are so brave. They have managed to do what I never could do despite my semi-best efforts. I try to […]
Why do those who live in the war of staying strong continue to fight if the battle is never ending? Why must you go through so much pain in order to deserve a shred of happiness? Does it end? Is what they say true, that after so long, the striking pain eases? And why do I and so many others, use physical pain to fight off the mental pain? It only helps temporarily, but still, any help is worth my time. Can we just stop all the sadness and live a life of bliss and peace? Or is that too selfish to ask? Why do […]
Hi, I guess. I’ve been browsing this site for about two days to see what it was all about. I discovered it while being extremely upset Sunday afternoon, and well… I guess I decided to post here. I really need help… This is very long by the way I’m sorry.
I feel stupid for even feeling depressed and suicidal. It’s not new, I’ve been like this for a while now. At least a year. Before I tell what tipped me off, I guess I’ll give some background… I’m so sorry for bothering everyone on here I needed to get this out.
In seventh grade I […]
I’ve been depressed for about five years. I’m now in high school about (if) to go into the 11th grade this September. I’m pretty much at the end of my rope when it boils down to getting support. The times I have told people about my suicidal thoughts, I get in response, “That’s messed up…” “I know how you feel…” (Mind you these responses are coming from people who are just giving out a response because in reality they really don’t know how I feel.) They don’t know how it feels like to get limbs sprained and be laughed at, with literally no support out […]
Here I am again, didn’t kill myself, pretty sure I won’t, but I’m already dead. Told God to leave me alone today, told Satan to take a hike too. How stupid is belief in God? I lay blame at his feet, I try to shame him by saying I would never treat my children they way he treats me, fact is, I do, I ignore the true needs of my son and he is lost just like me. My wife mocks me, says I need help, all I see is a bobble head when she talks and I hate her. I’m numb, dead inside, I […]
even though, I am tied to an anchor.
now when I die, the music that I wish to praise.
kingdom child and glory. his name is johnny.
the might is in your hand. a dying spirit of holy.
mother. auntie. sister. brother. let’s go.
on to the next verse. but I forgot the next line.
reversed. I am not the beauty, you are. I am the darkness.
my cane and your my light of life. my dead face and hand.
undead me. a mother of holy. this is not a love story.
immigrant from Europe country. I still can’t leave the country, of u.s.
America is starting […]
Give me an hour or two..
I’m sure some people are tempted to view this site as a bunch of whiners talking about suicide but never doing anything. Or as my own idiot therapist said: “Why talk about it? If you’re going to do it, then do it.”
But the truth is that many SP users have actually gone ahead and done it. They post here as a last stop before the unknown, and then they cross over. So no, we’re not just a bunch of lookie-lous.
I was wondering if anyone had been keeping a list of confirmed, or very likely, suicides of SP users. Maybe it would be nice to have […]
September 26, 2013
Imagine going home every day feeling terrible about yourself because a boy thought it’d be
funny to start an inappropriate rumor about you. How would you feel if every day you hid up in your
room crying because the girls at school whispered that you were fat, ugly, and worthless? What if you
were so anxious about the outfit you were wearing that took two hours to pick out that you plead sick
and stay home because you don’t want to be laughed at today like you were the day before? Eventually,
you find yourself left with seemingly only one option, it didn’t […]
Hey, beautiful people!
I was on this site two years ago as one of you. I was young, depressed, and had intentions of taking my own life. While I don’t see any familiar names, it was people like YOU who helped me become the person I am today. Today, I absolutely love my life. The narrow path I was on may have devastated me, but here I am today. I am here to tell you all that it DOES get better. By talking to people who genuinely care about you and having a little hope, you can get better. I promise. I have helped several people […]
Hello People
i was searching for the word suicide and bumped into this website, and it seems helpful to speak about my suicidal tendencies.
Ok, so i believe in reincarnation, so for me suicide will not get me what i want , which is total non existence , it is like living in an prison and sentenced to live in it for eternity , if i die i reincarnate in that same prison over and over . And you beg for your own execution , but souls are eternal and can’t be destroyed with any weapon.
So, my aim is not the earthly suicide ( killing your body ) , […]
I can’t take it anymore. I am breaking into pieces , I’m just tired of life , that’s all!! 🙁
I’m sick of all the shit. I can’t fight the Demons inside me , I just wanna drag the blade on my skin 🙁 !!!!! 🙁
Well, it’s officially clear. I am absolutely worthless and can’t do anything right.
I try to make people laugh, and it is instantly qualified as “begging for attention”, unless someone else does/says it, in which case, it’s hilarious.
I try to help out around the house and I get in trouble for not doing it right and yelled at because I am not my brother or sister.
I try to be myself and I get hated for it.
If I were to list all of the things I did wrong, the list would go on forever. I am a worthless screw-up and the world would […]
Let me ask a stupid question again. So I am taking part in this research study on how sports activity affects depressed people. We are 5 participants and 4 jogging instructors, but it was only the first meeting, so apparently more people will join in later. Anyways, some of you may know I am shy. And I was running next to a girl for the first 10 minutes and we said nothing, it was really awkward. Eventually she just jogged past me and started talking to another girl and I ended up talking to another computer science student about technical stuff. It really bothers me […]
It’s hard to stare at a blank page, feeling so much inside but not being able to put any of it into words, or answer why it happens. In Psychology, they say Free Association is a way to examine the unconscious, where you say whatever comes to mind, but what if you can’t put anything in to words? I’ve never been much of a writer because how could I be one when words fail me so often. I’m in a different universe than everyone else, no one understand what I’m trying to convey and I can’t speak the language to get it across myself.  It’s like […]
How does one have courage when they fear life itself? How does one have hope when everything they’ve ever believed in has died? How does one keep living when they’re already dead?
Living each day like a zombie isn’t fun. Waking up, groaning, moaning, wandering aimlessly… That’s all I do. I am a zombie. I’m the living dead.
But I’m not!
I don’t even understand myself… I hardly expect anyone else to.
I have good days, but they’re overpowered by the bad. I have days when I feel alive. And those days are the days when I have courage and I feel hopeful. If I didn’t have those days, […]
The one thing I always thought wouldn’t change no matter what is my hometown, I’d always come home to the same house, my same friends, my best friend living right down the street. Now that I’m graduating in less than a month, I realize this isn’t true, and I’m lost. One of the only things I care about in this entire world is Ali, my best friend, of 14 years. And at the end of the summer, when I leave for college in Maryland, she’s moving out to California with her boyfriend. It’s never going to be the same. I always thought I’d come home […]
I am getting very disgusted God. My “inner” strength is beginning to wane. I am starting to feel like shit again!
Today I’m sharing with you guys what I did to end my life, maybe it will help you to know what won’t work for a suicide plan.
My first attempts were some knows classic stuf, cutting, Overdosing painkillers, Injecting some poisonous liquids, drowning etc …
My last attempt was finishing a full bottle of scotch whisky and a lot of amisulpride pills, I was taken to hospital and all I got is 4 days of pain over all my body.
For now I’m searching for 2 helium tanks, I see a lot of poeple fail at suicide by helium because of exhaling Co2, but after all I should […]