Isn’t is funny how easily auto-pilot comes on in the very darkest of days? The lies flow so smoothly. I talk about fixing my car, getting an apartment. I continue my discussions about long-term career goals. All the while, I stare at the person I’m talking to, wondering distantly if this will be the last time I talk to them. It’s just that everyone seems so far away at this point. My plans have become my obsession. I have tunnel vision. Besides a vague, quickly released thought, I can’t allow myself to think too deeply about them and the effects my actions will have. But […]

Or God, maybe you’re the same thing…

Anyway,

Why do you do this to me? The lonely nights where you wish someone was there just to sit next to you and chat in the late hours of the night about nothing in particular. Just to get your mind off of what you want most – eternal sleep.

I have so much love to give and lately it’s been given in the wrong places. Maybe I’ve just come to accept it. That it’s going to be a part of my twisted life. But there’s something about this…like perhaps we were meant to be one day. I don’t know. I […]

It just hurts so much.
Everywhere I go, anything I do, I think of you. And then I think of how you don’t want me.
I don’t even know why. We were so happy.
It hurts too much.
The pills blur the pain but I know its there.
I can’t live this way.
It hurts.

My life is empty without you. It was going to be even before you, but now there’s no chance.
I just want to go back. I don’t know how we ended up here but I need you. I miss you.
I feel like I don’t stand a chance but I […]

Long story short: So there is this girl. We had crush on each other for very long time, then I had enough courage to tell her what I feel for her and she said she felt the same but she was afraid that I might be in love with someone else. Then we started dating and it lasted 6 months, and then se left me because she had mental problems and she was very confused and hurt inside, and I try to understand that. She even asked me back but I was too hurt and had lost my selfconfidence so we didn’t get back together, […]

When people ask me what I want to be in five years, the answer that pops to mind is ‘dead’. But when people are asking people how you are, they don’t expect the answer ‘depressed, suicidal, and really close to giving up’.  I don’t know why I’m here anymore. There’s not future in sight, it’s just suffering. And I don’t think that I can take much more of this. I’m here because I have nowhere else to g. I’m here because I am a pathetic, useless coward, and I don’t have the strength to end it. Days aren’t days anymore. They’re jsut stupid obstacles that […]

i am so tired of having to fake a smile so that other people can accept me, i am so tired of having to pretend that i am tired instead of telling people the truth that i cant handle my life. i am “happier when am sleeping than when i am awake. my dreams keep me going knowing that one day i will jump off from that building. i am tired of getting rejected because i love too easily, now i am afraid to say i love in fear that i will lose someone, i only have one close friend and now like always i […]

Today’s my self harm’s four year anniversary.

I always end up in a depressed state, eating disorder state, anxiety state and so on. Every time I’m in these states, I always end up convincing myself that I’m okay and by acting so fake and by acting like I’m okay, I begin to believe I am, even though I’m still sick.  And when I realize that I’m not okay, I end up back in these states. The truth is, although depression, self harm, bulimia and so on are killing me inside and hurting me, I actually love being depressed, self harming and having an eating disorder, but I end up loving these sicknesses until they […]

Look! See the loverless boy. He watches the planes take off. Only in the dawn when the sun is low. Only in the night when the moon is bright. Oh loverless boy! Your eyes will see the world from space. You will sings the songs of a different race. Loverless boy why do you worry? This place is only temporary. You wanna love a another one but that one there is only human. You wanna hold her soul inside, you want your bodies to collide. Loverless boy remember your duty. Your mission is a bigger story. Go now back to see the planes. They’ll keep […]

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Alot of people judged me on my last post. I just want to say sorry. Want a real letter here you go. My name is dani. I am 16 years old. thats  me in the pictue. fakeing a smile again.I am more than finished with life. I have been bullied,abused, raped, hated and left out my entire.

I have become hopeless and honestly I can’t do shit anymore. I Came to vent and found that letter thing online. I can’t write so I just googled […]

if you were my friend
you would have been there when i needed you
if you were my friend
you wouldnt have stolen from me
if you were my friend
you wouldnt have played with my emotians
if you were my friend
you wouldnt have stolen her from me
if you were my friend you wouldnt have tried to stab me.
if you were my friend
i wouldnt be writing this

thats why your not my friend any more

they call teenagers/young adults pretty or handsome?

I went to work with my dad today as he got me an internship there, and many of his friends were commenting on how handsome I was. I felt flattered but as someone with body dysmorphic disorder, I couldn’t take any of them seriously. Is it something that you adults just say or do you actually mean it?

I’d like honest answers.. thanks.

My favorite thing in the world is being there for someone like us. I am 17, a junior in HS, and I have 7 MS girls who are just like me. Cutters, suicidals. I can only help so much. Today, to get one to stop, I put my blade to my arm, on a line I have thinned out from my elbow to wrist, just in case I ever need to do it. It’s a pain to watch them worry, but a relief to watch them stop. I’ve gone back to cutting, though. What gives me the right to stop others when I can’t stop […]