When I go to school, out of the corner of my eye I can see them pointing and laughing. When I walk through the halls, I can hear the whispers. Do they think I can’t hear them? Do they think, I am really that stupid to not see through their lies? I am not their friend, I never will be. To them, I will always be a “whore”. “Pathetic”. “Loser”. Ever since what happened on Wednesday. I ignored them. A couple minutes ago, one of my closest friends video called me to call me a whore. “YOU’RE A WHORE. YOU SHOULD GO DIE.” he said. […]
you know that life is like a ticking clock nobody knows when its gonna stop before im gone i need to touch someone with a word with a kiss with a decent song
and it gets lonely when you live out loud when the truth that you seek isnt in this crowd you better find your voice better make it loud we gotta burn like fire or we’ll just burn out
*** *** dolls rebel love song.
Man, it’s been a long day
Stuck thinking ’bout it driving on the freeway
Wondering if I really tried everything I could
Not knowing if I should try a little […]
This website, though I havent been on for an extremely long time, has seriously made my days a bit brighter.
It’s just nice to have some people who kind of understand what I’m going through. kind of.
But still, it feels exremely good to share my feelings with people who wont judge. I wont be called an attention seeker, wont get judged, and will be talking to people who will actually listen.
To be honest, I started this because I was basicly forced to. My therapist, who has become a very good friend of mine even though I’m a teenager, said it might be good to talk out […]
User muspelhem posted this in a comment earlier today – it’s a good read and worth the few minutes it takes to read and ponder objectively –
http://www.cracked.com/blog/6-harsh-truths-that-will-make-you-better-person/
For the record – I’m an atheist – but that doesn’t change the relevance of the following parable:
Crosses To Bear
A young man was at the end of his rope, seeing no way out, dropped his knees in prayer. “Lord, I can’t go on,” he said. “I have too heavy of a cross to bear.”
The Lord replied, “My son, […]
Its Official. Monday Night I’m Ending My Life! Its What’s Best For Me. Overdosing On Menstruation Pills! They Get You Tired So If I Take The Whole Bottle (34 Pills) Then I’ll Die! I’ve Been Waiting For This Decision For Awhile. Gotta Stay Brave! (:
So, I went for a hike today after work and found this spot, its so beautiful. I think that had I had the freedom I would have jumped. But there is still some busness for me to finsih before I am able. There is some family debt I want to clear, some things I need to make sure are to the proper owners and I need to file my tax’s so that my family can have the funds. 🙂 But all in all my plan is going great so much.
One month
Two days
Then the pain is over.
How could it be
This land of make believe
It simply gets more familiar.
Think of it this way: life is a set of challenges, challenge after challenge. The point of life is to show the world how much of a badass you are by overcoming these challenges. Yeah, it’s hard, yeah, it sucks, and yeah, it would be a lot easier to give up. But don’t you think it would be better to leave a legacy on the world, as that one awesome person who overcame so many things, and still ended up ok?
So, I stumbled upon this site from Google. I haven’t been very depressed recently, and actually, my life has somewhat improved. It still is hard, but I would like to share my experience with you all.
I was 9 years old, and it was the summer after 3rd grade.
I had been raised by a loving, Catholic family, and went to a Catholic school. In my eyes, the world was a lovely place, and there was no other place I’d rather be. I had one best friend who I spent every day with. To me, everyone believed in God, because who wouldn’t?
My perfect vision of the […]
murder.
you killed me.
murder.
bleed, bleed.
murder.
Is it funny now.
murder.
knock me to the ground.
murder.
am I still a slut.
murder.
80 lbs. is fat now.
murder.
am I still a ****?
murder.
Missing her makes me a ****** now?
murder.
yes I know i’m crazy. I’ve heard it before.
murder.
Yes I know I should die. you’ve said it before.
murder.
I don’t know why I’m still here.
murder.
Give me a gun and I’ll dissapear.
murder.
is it funny now?
murder.
seeing me life drained on the ground.
murder.
Did it satisfy.
looking at my cuts, watching me cry.
I feel drained.
All my energy is being drained by that dark hole I so often talk about.
To whoever said it will get better, well fuck you, cus it doesn’t. It just keeps getting harder. And I keep getting weaker.
My bestfriend today texted me “did you die?”. And I know she didn’t mean anything wrong, whatsoever (she doesn’t know how I feel or how badly I want to die), she was just saying that cus I hadn’t said anything all day (well, given that I woke up at 8pm, it’s understandable). But, as I looked at that text I just wanted to reply “YES“, and I […]
My Email: CassandraPadula8@Gmail.com. You Can Email Me About Anything! I’m Here For All Of You. Yes, I May Be Depressed And I Can’t Tell You I Know How You Feel Or Everything’s Going To Be Okay, Because I’m Not Even Sure Its Gonna Be Okay. My Life Sucks And I Can At Least Be A Friend To You Guys<3 So Message Me Whenever You Want. I Gotchu. Xx
   As I’ve spoken about in previous posts, I’ve had depression, anxiety and paranoid delusions for most of my life and it’s not easy to live with, especially the depression.
    For me, at 11 years old it began with a deep sadness that just never seemed to lift. It spiralled pretty quickly and I began to spend an awful lot of time alone in my bedroom. I felt as though I was the loneliest person in the world because nobody could really relate to what I was feeling. The thing that got to me most was that some people would say things like, “you’re […]
I have a website you see that i tried to get across to help adolescent teens with suicide prevention.. but i guess it won’t help if im gone. I have completely been broken apart and i plan to end it all tonight. I’ve lost everything and just keep loosing more. I’m done.. if you wanna talk my cell is 587-402-3444 i’m 15 years old and i don’t wanna see the rest of my life. check my website if you want… www.piawnr.weebly.com bye guys <3
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what am i supposed to be? wolverine? what is this advanced healing and regeneration? and if my body is capable of such feats than why doesn’t my mind share this uncanny ability to heal itself? because i would certainly like to forget all this accumulating pain. if this book is about NDE’s (near death experience) you will hear them. i have several. and now with that tylenol overdose… which i remember very well… i couldn’t stand anymore. i could feel the pills exploding one by one in my chest. vomiting non stop for the occasion, i tried again to stand but knees crumpled instantly beneath […]
i guess you can say lifes unfair. yes it is. very. my dad was tooken away from me faster than i could blink my eyes. my world turned grey since then, everything sucks. life is just horrible. i hate my life i hate it
I gain hope. I gain strength. But what do I not gain everyday after I cry and keep from cutting myself? A promise. I guess that’s okay, considering that promises mean nothing anymore, but still. They kick me down, I get up, they do it all over again. Harder and harder each time. Every. Time. Â It never fails. Trevor won’t even look at me anymore. It seems like no one will. Or they do, but every time they do, they laugh. The girl that was my best friend, Emily, turned on me. I’m talking complete 360 degree circle. She acts like I know nothing, mean […]
Im excited.
No, really I am.
I’m going to Miami in a couple of days. It’s for my dad’s work and my cousins wedding. I’m going to see me family. im going to get out of this cold weather. Im going to see my cousin have the best day of her life.
Buuut, I’m also going to have to wear a swimsuit.
And, see my grandmas face fall when I walk in.
She doesnt like me that much. I’ve heard her say so. She doesnt approve of my “lifestyle”. She says Im a slutty, skater, who has no self control. I’m also a mess, bad example, and a future druggie.
Thanks […]
It’s the only thing they really care about.
Today I lay awake trying to will myself to my chores, with a man whom I am not inspired by, with a child I have no motherly passion for I do today entertain my weary mind while I work with the song of the shirt.
With fingers weary and worn, With eyes heavy and red, A woman sits in unwomanly rags, Plying a needle and thread, In poverty hunger and dirt, She lifts her head and sings the song of the shirt
“Work Work Work
While the cock is crowing in the dawn on the roof
and Work Work Work
Till the stars shine on the roof
To this life I […]
Do you ever get that feeling where you don’t want to talk to anybody? You don’t want to smile and you don’t want to fake being happy. But at the same time you don’t know exactly what’s wrong either. There isn’t a way to explain it to someone who doesn’t already understand. If you could want anything in the world it would be to be alone. People have stopped being comforting and being alone never was. At least when you’re alone no one will constantly ask you what’s wrong, and there isn’t anyone who won’t take ‘I don’t know’ for an answer. You feel the […]