I care, I love you. But if you were one day gone I have seen I can live with out you even though it the begging I though I couldn’t. It hurt, but…I see I am strong enough to move on. Yes I have to listen to the music you shown me, yes I have to look at my phone every single 5 minutes but it’s a habit. At least it doesn’t make me want to cry when you don’t say anything back…

so i just found out one of my close friends and also my crush, ran away due to bullying and his depression and then commited suicide. cut his wrist 6 times and then hang himself. i will miss him so much. my heart breaks each day. he was my inpersation and my help. we made sure we both ate and that we didnt self harm. thanks to him i had survived from suicide and i started eating but now that he has gone i have lost my hope. i wish i had seen this coming so i could save him. i loved him i now […]

I don’t really feel like doing anything. My mind is numb. My mom is annoying. What the hell. A moment ago I was trying to find enjoyment from the music I like to listen to and the books I like to read but I just wasn’t feeling it as much as before maybe. There’s so much I’m supposed to do but I don’t want to do any of it. Maybe I’m just lazy. But every day is the same as the day before. I mean what’s the point? I’m not that old yet but I feel old. I just don’t have the energy or the […]

Why were we put on Earth to suffer?

Im done with everything…. bye

Hey there guys…its me again…well today started out bad and hasn’t got much better really on the bright side dad had to leave for school today and wont be back till at least Tuesday or Wednesday, but he couldn’t leave on a good note. He had to tell me i was a lazy useless fat ass so i’ve decided until i get down to a better weight today was my last time eating. I’m sick of his mouth i’m sick of living in this house and having to have a worthless father who i feel like doesn’t want me here anyway. On another note mom did […]

I lost my darling angel Nicci. 6 months hasn’t healed a thing. I love you and miss you and want to die without you baby. Today would have been our 4 year anniversary, but you chose to leave me and cut me off. You never explained the truth to me. I just want you back sweetheart. I miss you so much and can’t live without you.

Dark red
Trickles
Trickles down her arm
A special little secret
Known as self harm

Dark silver
Blade
Is the one that she trusts
The one that she turns to
When life becomes too much

Long white
Sleeves
To cover her pain
Hide her relief
Hide the cuts again

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1rK89g1BNDA

No one cares about me anymore.. i feel as though im standing in a room of crowded people screaming for help.. but no one can hear me.. they dont care. im sick of this and being the one thats misunderstood and ignored. no one understands me and pushes me aside when they get bored. its fucking shit, and i wish someone cared? because tbqh no one does! yeah some may act like it but inside they’re like ” aw fuck off soph” and im like left alone, upset and always crying, i seriously dont want to be here anymore.

seriously and honestly tell me whats worth living for when no one understands you

I was a sad little girl.  35 years later, I’m a sad little girl who’s been on just about every medication possible.  They all stop working after a few years.

I’ve never really had a relationship.  I’m not sure what’s so unappealing.  Maybe my sadness is more obvious than I think.  Men don’t even pay attention to me.  They never have.  Having cute bubbly friends doesn’t help.   My mother has nagged me about my weight since high school when I started gaining weight from the antidepressants.

I have a job and an education.  I live in a rented 2 bedroom house that is much too big […]

Not anywhere, not anytime, not anymore. I really feel like dung has been thrown at me and I can’t shower it off. I’m going alone to my room now because I’m getting mean and pessimistic. I swear it’s the atmospheric pressure….Please won’t someone just run me over with a car?!

Im sorry that I’m misbehaving.

I need you to come here and safe me.

I haven’t grown weary of life yet, I’m just deeply frustrated. There have been thoughts of death lingering in my mind. They’re not constant, but they’re frequent enough to be distressing. I’m too scared to take the so-called coward’s way out. The act of dying frightens me too deeply to try suicide. I’ve been slogging through the days, somehow keeping my academics mostly intact, but I don’t know how long I can keep going, as I find myself procrastinating a lot. I’m not a strong person, and although I’m not quite convinced I should die, I don’t know how long I’ll be able to keep […]

Im wondering if anyone here is from Tucson,AZ like me….. and if they like coffee and talking about how to heal the sadness…. I just don’t think my current friends get it

i have been feeling pretty good after me and my boyfriend got back together he made me feel so happy again and the happiest girl in the world, me and him was all that mattered to me. I got him back and only realized after he moved away this week that i was so dependent on him too make me happy, he is the only reason i want to get out of bed some days! he said he would come back after two months but lets not bull shit our self he is most likely going to stay with his parents alot longer then two […]

I don’t cry when I sleep….. I just woke up…… the tears remind me that I’m alive here in this world…… awake…… I just want something big to change…… I don’t think I can sleep forever…… or can I? I’ve spent my life trying to end it…… and funny enough I spent it helping others find happiness and reasons to keep living…… I’m going back to bed soon….. maybe….. I just cry uncontrollably these days, and the only thing that stops the endless flow…… sleep…… I wish I could remember my dreams…… I used to remember them well, but now not so much….. I do […]

Suicide is Mandatory.

‘… And if so, than how can I best do it ( e.g. the Angle at which I aim the sharp-pointed object into (…) and what I should do with my Neck & Head during impact to increase the chance of dying. ) ?