What if you were told you only had a month left to live? And not because of cancer or anything?  What would you do in that one month?

Hello

Well from my previous post I informed those who read it that towards the end of the year I will use the exit bag method.

I was just wondering what would be really nice music to pass away to. I was thinking about listening to my favorite tracks which is thrash metal and drum and bass orientated. But I was watching a movie the other day and Simon and Garfunkel’s Sound of Silence came on and it was such a nice soothing song. It made me realize I need some more down tempo stuff. Music is a big part of my life it is by far […]

Please, please, please just give me a few minutes. I love you. I dont care how old you are,  where your from, what you do. I dont give a fuck.

No body told us life would be easy.

Heck, I dont have any right to say that. I’m 14. I have more common sense then 75% of my high school.

I cut, because i feel my parents put so much pressure on me. I eat “YOUR FAT!” , I dont eat “YOUR SICK!” i dont know what tot hink anymore. But im holding on, Im holding on because

I know I want to be happy in the future.

I want […]

” Every night, you cry yourself to sleep,

Thinkin’ why does this happen to me?

Why does every moment have to be so hard? ”

Yes, this is true.

Hello,I’m here to help anyone with their problems.If you need to talk about your feelings just email me at shanecia.anthony@gmail.com.

Last year I was suicidal, but it went away. I’m not sure how. I don’t know what I did to make it go away, but I would like to know.  It’s coming back. Suicide is in my head again. Today I was home all day, in my bedroom. No one came inside, no one talked to me. I was crying, not because no one was talking to me, or wondered why I haven’t gone outside, I was crying because it hurts. What hurts? Everything hurts. Not anything physical. Emotional and mental pain. Lately, my parents have been cruel to me. They don’t hit me. I know I haven’t done anything to make them so […]

“The Help Project” was started to help give people with problems and issues someone to talk to. Please like and message us at http://www.facebook.com/pages/The-Help-Project/400723446661472

I sit in my room.. crying.. balling my eyes out.. screaming in my pillow.. why does my life have to be so horrible..? I cant bare it anymore.. i want to die.. i want to leave this ugly world….. People say there are great places in this world.. well i would love to see them…. Can u show me???? Yah thats what i thought.. no one can show me.. canthey…? Wel no one is listening to me.. so no one cares bout me… why should i live if no one cares……… Goodbye

Not yet, probably, but it will be how I go away eventually.

I don’t connect with anyone in the way I’d want to. People drift in and out, but mostly out, and I always feel like they don’t genuinely like me. We don’t connect. Sometimes they find me funny, sometimes maybe even smart and charming, but mostly it seems as though they don’t care about me. They don’t care for me, and I’m scared to be around them.

I have dreams, and I’ve done some things to make them come true, but if it doesn’t pan out, and if it turns out that life isn’t going to […]

Words hurt, but actions hurt most.

This is my first post.

I wish someone really understand me. I think I’m going to commit suicide tonight. I know that my family will be better without me. Everyone will be better without me. If nobody support me, Why should I live? I wanted to do a lot of things in my life, but nobody’s approval. I don’t want to feel anything anymore. I’m sick of people telling what to do, what is right and what is wrong. They drive me crazy and then they says I’m a psycho. I hate lies! Why is more easy to invent, to make a lie, when is […]

Yesterday my boyfriend Jonathan wanted to see me naked, and so i told him no. He told me how hard it was to not get things that he wanted, and i was getting a little frustrated over it and i said to him; “Just forget it, if there was a chance i would ever do that, it is gone now.” and then after that he told me; “Im not in the mood for this, my life sucks, bye.” then i said to him “And you think i’m in the mood? get over yourself. life isn’t perfect, and it will never be perfect, and i have […]

As requested on my other posty thing of randomness, here are some garden-shots:

Miaow.

Well, I did have to random it up a bit. 😛

If anyone I know away from the computer sees this post, meh. Not like it really matters at this point in my life.

usually the last*

i look through my contacts, knowing that no one understands me, i cant talk to anyone about why im in such a mess, i feel sick because i’ve been crying and cutting and pushing my body to its limits. why me? why am i like thiss… x

I’m 21 years old. And there are reasons why I keep having bad thoughts:

I have an abusive mother and stepfather, my dad passed away in February this year.

When my dad passed away, I had to grieve alone as my mother and step father did not want to know.

My mother and step father had been abusing me emotionally and physically for years until I moved out at the age of 18.

I’ve finally plucked up the courage to tell them that I do not want to know them/be in contact with them anymore. I didn’t do this to make a stand- I did it because I genuinely […]

time does not  ease me of my pain.

the remnance of his lies, his face

still rest uneasy on my brain.

when one can bare no longer

the scars that run deep in my emotions,

now merge and run deep in my flesh.

now physically and mentally

branded by my troubled days,

i cannot get away from the cold hands of shame.

to him this is a game, to bring me endless pain

through stiring my past and blocking

my happiness in every way.

today my life is tainted by this

everlasting shede of darkness that shrowds

my living days. one day I will end my shameful ways.

I dont know what to do anymore..

i just turned 25..

I have always been a thinker, i think about everything.. too much at times..I cant say my life was horrible at all times.

I did have a somewhat troubled childhood. But i always try to think that there are others that had it much worse.

like i said im 25 now, i have spent the past few years in and out a psychiatric institution due to my depression. I left the instititution in august.. I  really was better, and i had found some motivation to start again  And right now im living in a house with 4 others, […]

I am weird. I like taking my laptop outside and browsing the internet from my garden. I have four cats and I can describe their mannerisms and personalities with enough detail to fill a novella. I collect miscellaneous original artwork that I purchase at thrift shops. I am a romantic who can design and implement server platforms, and I know my way around *NIX systems. I like to fiddle with Gentoo Linux. I have a fiddle, and I like to play it. I also like to make tobacco pipes out of wood I collect while wandering in the middle of nowhere. I enjoy basket […]

How crass of me to think living my life in a good way would be beneficial?  Somehow I’d appease myself or ‘God.’ It really doesn’t mean anything I am finding. There is no glory, no making a difference, no touching someone in a small way only a momentary feeling of ‘goodness’ so quickly to evaporate.

I was there all that time for him. When the world was a dark, lonely place with no light in sight. Years of health issues and not being able to live. Sadness crept in when people who were supposed to be friends skipped out of the picture and never acknowledged his […]

The days now drag on. Not getting better. I have 3 weeks they said until I start to. Each day and each thought push me closer to doing it. I’m still wondering why I haven’t. The fear took me over and let me go. My mind doesn’t stop, doesn’t let me rest. It keeps me up and it asks me why I’m letting it suffer. I have no answers. No one does. I guess I’m living on the hope that someone might. That I could actually get better. I doubt it. I highly doubt it. I feel like a freak. Afraid to let anyone know […]