I know in the back of my mind it won’t help but it’ll at least help me forget.
or give me the confidence to finally kill myself. I need to feel less guilty. Then I’ll finally do it.
Tag:
better
science is boring ! science fiction is better than science fact ! sci-fi is better than science fact ! real science is boring !
by niki
written by niki
science is boring !
science fiction is better than science fact !
sci-fi is better than science fact !
real science is boring !
Reality is boring ! Reality sucks !
Real life is boring ! Real life sucks !
Real world is boring ! Real world sucks !
I also hate this life, I hate people / humans (well.. MOST/90% of them), I hate reality, I hate this world.
its very BORING !! and especially nowadays become ONLY very materialistic, money / profits driven only, all about money, money, money, & image, image, image! ; it’s very superficial, shallow, and mundane boring!
I HATE MONEY […]
suicide does not end the chances of life getting worse, suicide eliminates the possibility of it ever getting better <3
I settled on a plan a few months ago, but I neglected to scope out where exactly to do it. That should keep me busy next week. The fire department being alerted / arriving in time is the only thing that scares the shit out of me.
Do you guys think it’s better to die sober or totally fucked up? It seems more respectful to do it sober for some reason…? I have a lot of oxycodone left over from surgery that I could take with some booze beforehand, though.
When I was in senior school I wanted to die; I don’t mean that in the typical “too much work, not enough freedom” way… I mean it, I really wanted to die. I’d written the perfect note, I had a million painkillers all crushed up ready to mix with some water and down. I didn’t even care what anyone said that day at school ‘cause I knew when I got home it would all be over. Lunchtime arrived and I only had two lessons left until the end of the day; double English. I loved English ‘cause no one really bothered me in it. For […]
Whenever I talk about suicide with my family or friends, they always say the same things: it’s wrong, it’s selfish, it’s just NOT GOOD. And yeah, I get the part that by doing it, you’d hurt those that love you. But the thing is, when I think about suicide, I think about how the people around me would be better off in some way and how I’d spare them and the people that I might cross paths with in the future. I don’t want to hurt anyone. I don’t want to be a bad person. And that’s one of the reasons why I want to […]
I have noticed a relatively common theme among suicidal people is the belief that the people around them – and the world in general – would be “better off” without them. They often express remorse and inner turmoil for the pain they have caused others.
It’s strange – even during my own darkest moments, I never believed anyone would actually be “better off” without me. No better or worse? Absolutely (truthfully, that is where much of my pain derived from – the fact that it didn’t seem to matter whether or not I existed). But not better.
The way I see it, if you recognize the fact […]
I really wish I was never born.. nothing I do is worth anything. I cant make anyone hapoy and everything and everyone I come in contact with turns to shit. I just want it all to end. Realisticly it would be better for everyone in my pathetic life.. I just cant deal with the disappointment I cause everyone. My wife and kids would do better without me……
So I just printed my suicide note and hung the pages on my wall and then took some markers/highlighters to it to basically spice it up and draw some additional attention to all of the people I hate, and honestly, it actually made me feel better….
Just in case anyone else wanted to try the technique for a temporary band-aid on a gushing wound.
People always say ‘ there are reasons for being alive, stay here, we need you’ yeah, you need me do you? Well tell that to me the next time you ditch me for someone better. Everyone is better than me. I don’t see the point of being here; I don’t think there is one. I self harm. People tell me to stop but others tell me to keep going. But I have made up my mind. I’m leaving, no one needs me nor do they want me . My own mother has disowned me. She says it’s my falut my sister is dead. She says […]
I feel sick with it. Sometimes it’s a big empty whole, sometimes the whole fills with a nausiating meloncholy substance formed of some vile nostalgia. My eyes see only ugliness. A waste land. And my body crawls across it’s filth. Motivated by someone else’s idea of hope. To reach what? perhaps another minute, or better yet a minute left behind. Another moment of agony I’ve put behind me. There are moments of another nature however. I’d say the suffering isn’t worth them, but what the hell. Water is so much better when your thirsty.
I’ve been unhappy since I can remember. Sometimes I forget, that I’m unhappy in certain situations, but it never lasts longs and I quickly get back to my normal state of depression. It’s really hard for me to find thinks that I find enjoyable enough to make an effort to experience them.
I have always wondered what was wrong with me. I studied some psychology and read a lot of self-help books. I made some progress, but I never understood why, despite my seemingly great live, I felt so worthless. Yesterday I stumbled upon the TED talks by Brene Brown and I finally realized what my […]
Night time sucks. I just lay here infested by terrible memories of a better time. I miss her. I shouldn’t but I do. She is the love of my life and the ignition of my ruin. I’m not going to do what I’m going to do because of her but because she’s gone. And I did it. I ended it. I wanted to be free of the burden of knowledge, but some shit just sticks. The worst part of it is the happiest memories of her are the ones that hurt the most. The ones I can’t purge. It’s an everlasting thorn in my flesh. […]
I am clumsy oath. I have no feel. I tried to massage my mother. I do not seem to feel anything. What am I good at? What am I doing here?
My ideas get rejected. I cannot even do a simple university assignment. I want to leave my university. My ego wants me to stay even I know really well I am going to kick out.
I like being alone because I feel even more alone with the people around me.
I am tired. I want all this to stop. I just don’t have the guts or energy to end this. THe world has come […]
How To change what I feel?
How to grow better and become a strong person?
How to get out of my stressful mind?
Sometimes I wish I could make peace with myself, but sometimes it’s so difficult to stop thinking.
There are so many wrong things, and sometimes it’s like I cannot bare them.
I am afraid to share my deepest feelings, even under an anonymous name.
I am afraid of my own feelings
I don’t know how to control my nostalgic feeling inside my heart.
Sometimes I think that after death, you just go home to some kind of warm light, to some kind of warm […]
I am 22 and I feel like I am living because I have 2, since I was a child I always knew I was different from the other kids, I was always wondering about death and where I will go… my parents got divorced when I was a kid, I actually don’t remember anything of that, but I remember being raped… since then I have been a lonely person and I am really afraid of relationships with guys , I had friends, but for some reason I ended up cutting the relationships with them, is like, a lot of people know who you are but […]
Hey, I dunno how things are for you but if you never see this then congrats! :p Hopefully because things ended up being a lot better than you would have imagined. I was honestly stunned the last day we messaged each other. I really wish that I could have helped you a lot more. To be able to do what you did for me. But then again I guess someone else was doing it. If you ever messaged me on kik, I probably never got it. I wipe my phone often. Sorry for not being there for you if you needed me. We lost contact […]
http://suicideproject.org/wp-content/uploads/2014/11/suicide-is-bad-for-your-health.mp3
This was inspired by iTried it.
I’m a super novice.
like I sttarted last week.
You can’t even sing the words to it.
but this is what i heard when I read your poem.
I wish I was a little bit better.
So many what ifs. So many assumptions.
“What if one day we all die? What if one day you leave me? What if I die now? What if I wasn’t born? Will everything be better?”
Beware, be careful. Be safe from your thoughts and divert attention from them. They are dangerous.
“what ifs” are questions that will kill you.
still sitting here hating everyone and everything…if its just a chemical imbalance then why is it not fixed? yeah things suck but they will not get any better either.