I wonder how my dad would feel if he knew I wanted to kill Myself so badly. It almost that time of year when girls go out to supper with their dad. I’ll probably stay home and cry but you know… That’s just me…
Tag:
cry
I cared about her so much and she threw it away. It was my fault but goddammit that doesn’t make it hurt less. I’m such an ass. I made her do things she didn’t want to and I ruined it. I… I’m a selfish prick… I’m going to cry and wish I could die tonight, but I won’t. I’m better than that. But this won’t stop hurting. not for a long time. This burns. Hollywood Undead. Black Dahlia. Most of it applies, but not all. Fuck. I care so much about her. I just want to make her happy. I thought I’d be okay being […]
I wanna live but i cant go through with it but i have to. There is so much for me to hide from people. People ask me if i’m okay I fake a smile and say yes. My collection of blades scare me and trick me into thinking im okay if i cut. I scream and cry wanting it all to go away.
I came here to get help .. so please no negative comments . Feel free to share your stories with me , I’m open to anything but , here’s mine ..
Its crazy . It hurts . It makes you feel so insane & lonely . You loving someone you know you’ll never have a chance with . What’s worse is never telling the person how you feel . When you constantly think of him more than yourself . You cry sometimes when you come to reality , when it all hits you .. it’ll never happen . Stop being irrational . Don’t be stupid . […]
Everyone knows I’m going to kill myself. Everyone knows why. What do they all do? Ignore me. I don’t matter one damn to any of my so called friends or my many bosses at two jobs that have been falsely praising me and blowing smoke up my ass for the past year. You should’ve seen the look on her face (one of my supervisors). Total “fuck you, go die”. Don’t cry about trans suicide when I’m dead, then!
Im never writing to myself, its always been a letter to the universe, if They could hear my thoughts. to you? which you may never receive ,if only by cause. or my final notice,which I never really know what I would say. But I know now understanding is never really quite enough, sure they understand,does this mean I’m not alone then why is it so cold in this heart, I call home. if it’s worth trying. ?I know it’s not enough which I why I should stop writing to you. It’s hopeless, Im hopeless. I don’t wanna be the reason, I don’t wanna cry. cause […]
i had a dream last night
i dreamt that i had died in my sleep and my spirit was standing by my dead body.
my mom came in to wake me up for school. she kept shaking and shaking me to get up.
i tried to tell her i died but she couldnt hear me.
when she realised i had passed she started to cry and my brother came in and cried too cause my mom told him what happened.
and i felt bad for leaving them so i stayed with them forever until they died.
but i couldnt go with them because i missed my chance so i was stuck […]
…
If her tears fall with no one around
Would you still be able to see it?
Somedays are hard
Others are harder
Choices are made that change her world
They can never be replaced
The love she had now fades to grey
As the passion she holds smolders to ash
All she can do is wallow and cry but,
If her tears fall with no one around
Would you still be able to see it?
The bitterness of life is unbearable
The pain that continues is crippling
She wonders if it ever subsides
The answer turns to no And everything continues
They go about their day knowing they are loved
She goes home […]
It would be selfish for me to kill myself considering all that my parents have done for me. They are the only 2 human beings that actually care about me. I just want to apologize to my parents for having such a big piece of crap that I am. I am literally already dead but still breathing. I stare brain dead into the computer screen all day, every tiny part of me is gone and I have to cry myself to sleep everyday. Being depressed for 5 years does that to people. How much longer I can keep going for my parents remains a mystery. […]
It’s funny how I ask to be normal. I wanna do normal shxt.
Like I wanna have a normal day. Get out of bed, shower, eat, go to work, come home and go to sleep. I can’t even do this.
My day is more like wake up crying [cause I wish I were dead] cry in the shower and don’t wanna eat. Call in because I’m too sad to work or go to work and cry. Then have insomnia all night.
Ppl take for granted the ability to have a simple day.
My dad,always yells at me,mostly if I have late homework.He tells me “You only think about your self!” Finding me crying,telling me to think about myself!And not to long ago.I was crying I wanna die.My dad was like “I don’t care!(in a whiny baby voice) I’m so poor and I wanna die just because I have to clean!”.My friends and my mother only know why I wanna die.My dear friend,Dorothy, died from a stroke…shortly after my tenth birthday.And she had got me lots of things and I wanted my mom to tell her I said “thank you” she said “no your going to make a […]
I wanna be happy but I feel like I don’t deserve to. I just hate myself so much. I’ll never be happy. I wanna cry.
It comes to rob in the pale moon light.
resistance is futile no need to fight.
All it seeks is your life to steal.
Bringing with it unbearable pain to feel.
Darkness creeps out of the corners of your mind.
Escaping its grasp is impossible you will find.
It starts out innocent, telling you things you once knew were lies.
Unable to see truth in darkness through your own eyes.
It begins to convince you the lies are really the truth in disguise.
Your life is meaningless, how could anyone like or love you.
You attempt to deny it, but you know it’s all true.
You find yourself alone again […]
how does she laugh how does she cry whats the color of her eyes does she even realize am here WHERE IS SHE where is this beautiful girl who is she whos gonna company my world!!!
Mistakes that haunt you
Not the ones, others expect
You wish they would
But you are alone
Just regret
Sick of girls wanting you
Sick of being alone
Sick of being amazing
Sick of being dull
With you, Primal.
With you, Final.
With you, I thought.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=luM6oeCM7Yw – Mogwai – Take Me Somewhere Nice
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kWQywgdW8oI – Kate Havnevik – Grace
I just wanted to share this, I can’t be the only who gets into a state of peace and serenity when listening to music.
These are two of my favorites, it may help or not, but I just want to share it.
maybe it’l help you cry
maybe it will help you in some other way.
Just stay quite,
just listen.
So, the “he” from my last update said hi today. Yes, he is in prison & he’s not supposed to have contact with me or the family at all. But he told his mom to tell “the guys” that he said hi. From now on, I shall refer to “him” as James. Of course, for the sake of privacy for both him & his family, that is not his actual name.
Anyways, that one small word made me fucking melt in both good & bad ways. When my mother walked upstairs to inform me of his greeting, my heart just fucking stopped. Every little memory […]
I remember that old song “it’s my party and I will cry if I want to.”
I kinda feel like that today. As my time comes to an end, I find myself doing a lot of things for the last time. It has a bittersweet quality to it.
My life before her was neither happy nor unhappy. I was just rolling along, existing the best could at any given point in time. Some ups, some downs, but mostly even keel.
Then she came to me and everything changed. Both for good and bad. But mostly good. I got to experience love and family. The two most important things […]
I cant sleep. I feel more alive in my dreams then i do in real life. When i wake up i sit and cry before putting on a fake smile and going to school. Im a pretty shy kid, i guess you could call me a nerd. got good grades but there not the best and i spend most of my time reading blocking out the real world. Anyways, back to the sleeping problem. I fall asleep around 12 at night and the problem is i cant stay asleep. i dream, wake up and cry, and go back to sleep. most of my nights are […]
Goodbye, Goodbye,
Tonight I die.
Today, Today
I’ll go away.
Tomorrow, Tomorrow,
Will be full of sorrow.
Goodbye, Goodbye,
I shall not cry.