I had an absolutely amazing life for the longest time. I’m not attractive and I’m shy, but I had amazing and wonderful friends, very good grades, and I was happy. Over the summer I had to move across the country with my family. I am miserable here. Nobody talks to me, and they all look at me strangely at school because I’m punk and I have piercings and I’m not the most attractive person. I have no friends and no one to talk to. I tell my parents I’m upset and I can’t do this anymore, but they tell me it will pass and I […]
ok, So that guy started talking to me again last night, he wanted to do it again. But i made up excuses like i wanted to do but had other things to do and i had to go….
And then today on facebook, One of his friends who he told about our past actions asked me this….’answer this question honestly ok? ♥
 if i offered to shag you 😉 what would you say? ;)♥’. I couldnt believe it…. I feel so dirty and used.
And all of that just added to yesterday, my dad didnt even say […]
On good days she feeds you with crumbs. You are irrelevant. You are only the host that carries the attention that she craves. She smiles at the ease with which you’ve flayed yourself open for her to take. She tosses you scraps of your own ignorance. The trail of hope  that keeps you coming back. She’ll peck until there is no more. You give because you know that if you stop, she will stop. She has no capacity to love. You have too much. You can only speak of the darkness in cliches. Your screams to God tearing through the sky like unholy devastation. Finding […]
There’s this funny little contraption in my chest.
Right here, on the right side of my body below my neck. I can feel it pumping blood through me, beating life into my veins, but that’s all I need to FEEL.
It’s called a heart.
I’ve never understood how this thing works. It’s just a part in my body, it doesn’t have a mind of it’s own, it’s not its own seperate entity, and yet It makes me feel emotions that I shouldn’t have to ever feel.
WHY???
Take love for instance. When your in love with someone your heart knows it. It swells with this creation of a thing I like to […]
I dont need someone to feel sorry for me, i just need someone to listen. From what i remember, its as if ive felt depressed every single day since i was a young teenaged boy. Its become my consistent personality that i dont know what its like to be confident, self driven or what it feels like to make someone else happy anymore. i used to just deal with my depression just like it was a part of me, but it was only last year that i started experiencing depression that made me anxious and taht i couldnt control. My mental state was very severe, and i had a strong compulsion to dash […]
As my username suggests, this story is from a few years back, but I think that it’s worth sharing. And yes, this is lengthy, but I’m very sure that it’s worth the read.
This was probably the worst I had felt in weeks, life just wasn’t working out for me. I was stressed under mountains of homework, stuck singing in a choir that I hated that controlled my life and I had no social life. I didn’t know how to deal or cope with stress at all. A week prior to that day, I kept writing in this one notebook:
“Tell somebody, tell somebody”
It was the last […]
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