Tag:

Finality

by nozmoking 8/30/2014

written by nozmoking

I’ve wasted much of the past fourteen years being lost in the pain of losing someone I cherished more than anyone. Some of you have seen the details puked out here on SP and I won’t go into them again – suffice it to say I gave my life to someone who decided it was more in their best interest to dump me in the gutter and run off with a child molester.

I’ve not had any contact with her for several years, at which time she got in touch with me for reasons still unknown. I made it clear I knew all the secrets, even […]

8/30/2014 4 comments

Gore websites

by tupacorbiggie 4/18/2013

written by tupacorbiggie

I recently have been looking at gore just to see what my corpse will look like if I decide to blow my brains out. Â It’s not exactly pretty and it makes it that much more real. Â The reality of suicide is pretty intense and final. Â What are your thoughts about gore and the finality of death?

4/18/2013 2 comments

random thoughts… memories are the killer.

by remembercide 2/1/2013

written by remembercide

(1)â€¨what am i supposed to be? wolverine? what is this advanced healing and regeneration? and if my body is capable of such feats than why doesn’t my mind share this uncanny ability to heal itself? because i would certainly like to forget all this accumulating pain. if this book is about NDE’s (near death experience) you will hear them. i have several. and now with that tylenol overdoseâ€¦ which i remember very wellâ€¦ i couldn’t stand anymore. i could feel the pills exploding one by one in my chest. vomiting non stop for the occasion, i tried again to stand but knees crumpled instantly beneath […]

2/1/2013 0 comment

Eloquent Statements on Suicide

by Jonathan72 12/31/2012

written by Jonathan72

If you have the time I’d appreciate your thoughts on the following extracts by writer Matthew Parris:

“When I die, and if I have to arrange it myself, I will consult nobody, and do it unassisted if I can. I entertain not a flicker of moral or practical doubt on the subject, and never have. Speaking only for myself — in such matters one should never judge for others — if Nature does not do the job in a timely manner I shall consider it a duty to take matters into my own hands.

I can’t tell you how simple I find these arguments: so simple […]

12/31/2012 2 comments

Why?

by icannotbelieve 9/30/2012

written by icannotbelieve

I have a normal life. A mother and family who loves me. And I am so utterly sad. My childhood was a mess of beating and abuse from my schoolteachers. My little brother and best friend died. I crave sympathy and the shock on people’s faces. I do nothing but sit around and feel sorry for myself. I am pathetic, I am a fool, a selfish, ungrateful, self centered loser who cannot commit to anything. I am 15 and I want to die already. My father is whining pile of sh*t that I hate. He is evil and I see him every day. I cut […]

9/30/2012 2 comments

i don’t really know where to start….

by violet_tears 5/16/2012

written by violet_tears

i feel empty. exhausted. so deeply sad.. & mad that nobody i know has the time to care.. despite having felt similar before & me having been there for them.
it is very fucked up.
i still miss the love of my life after 6 years.
but if i did die tomorrow.. i would feel that i had loved & been loved.
now i have ocd/anxiety/depression/phobias/ & what feels like a million more things wrong & a situation that has completely trapped me. i want to scream. i often do.
every time things get a little better.. somehow something else goes wrong & i am […]

5/16/2012 1 comment

Purgatory

by subtle_bloodstains 5/6/2012

written by subtle_bloodstains

In a state of perfect suspension
Floating in undetermination
Waves of anxiety growing
Drowning and dying in frustration
Death on my face barely showing

Losing myself in the painful sea
Undefined creature torture to be
Forever shifting in unmade Mind
Unsure of any reality
My created world now to me lies

Kill me now, my doubted creator
Unbalanced, uncompensated I suffer
Unknowingly giving all my heart
I am ever unable to conquer
This infectious hope of a new start

Confusion seeps in and soaks my soul
Unable to understand the whole
Torturous cycle never ending
Thousand fire burnt heart black as coal
Light my apathetic soul defeating

Peace, that […]

5/6/2012 1 comment

again

by tphg 2/8/2012

written by tphg

go to work
go to my moms house
take care of my brother
get high
go to sleep
rinse/repeat
weekend!!!!!!!!
take care of my brother
get high
go to sleep

I do other things but…. I’m sitting here willing myself to get up and go back to my moms house for the evening but I just can’t. Even if I had my own apartment again, it’s all so unsatisfying. I want.. i dunno. A woman? That doesn’t sound right but I’m sure it’s what my body wants. My mind is the problem. My body is healthy and fit.. my mind just doesn’t want. Doesn’t want anything, […]

2/8/2012 2 comments