Tag:

gonna

people never change… what’s the point in hoping?

by katiebear12 8/15/2014

written by katiebear12

http://m.youtube.com/#/watch?v=TXIP6DHrc2I

Everywhere I turn, I find someone who I think is going to treat me different, like I’m a person and not an object to be used. But they all turn out the same. All but one person, who I’m so scared that I’ll lose I begged them not to ever leave me on multiple occasions.

I’m all broken and hurt and I think I’d rather be dead right now than feel this. I’m not saying I’m wanting to die, but it was an observation. Why is love and friendship not easy to come by? It seems as if no one wants me for who I […]

8/15/2014 11 comments

I have my suicide planned

by fantazia 8/15/2014

written by fantazia

Hi everyone I don’t know what I’m gonna get out of this post but I only hope it’s good.

I really want to leave this earth I have a power cord and the staircase from my room that I have ready to hang myself from I have a letter ready aswell.

Im way too sensitive for this planet and I can’t handle all of the hatred everywhere not only aimed at me but at everyone. It’s a hell on earth I live in!

I wish I could block out all of the negativity I’ve tried and tried to no avail the only thing I feel will make me […]

8/15/2014 12 comments

breakdowns

by Mary Love 8/13/2014

written by Mary Love

My foster mom is so fucking hateful. I begin to take charge of my life, and she flips shit. I’m seventeen. I applied to take a nursing class at tcc so I can have a decent job in college and she freaked out and reminded me about how none of my family cares about me. About how i’m so alone in the world. I cried and cried….One more year.She got mad because “ever since I got back from my grandparents, I’ve acted like an adult”, which is her excuse to tear me down and rip me apart. I’m not gonna let her get to me. […]

8/13/2014 6 comments

I’m nothing but a memory

by Remnant The Unbroken 8/12/2014

written by Remnant The Unbroken

RIP Robin Williams. When I heard of his death, and the method, it disturbed me because I said, “even great people can be beaten by the demons”. Fuck suicide, fuck depression. It’s a fucking epidemic. Pardon my French, I’m having bad anxiety and self harm urges again today. And lately I’ve also wanted to “pretend” hang myself again. I used to tie a rope around my neck and yank until I felt like I was gonna pass out. I figure I better not do it but damn the urges to do whatever I can to be self destructive is so great.

Help me God.

8/12/2014 0 comment

strengt subsided pain took over

by awkward2680 8/6/2014

written by awkward2680

Two month going strong. To months I had enough strengt in me that i could actually feel, but it was slowly deteriorating with every little thing that happened it took a little bit of stength away till i finally hit my breaking point. The point where all the pain caused me to go numb. I needed to feel something. Love wasnt gonna happen happiness was a long way away sadness has been around to much and decided to go on vacation. Even my good friend fear wasn’t around. My best bet was pain. As i sit in a room only dimly lit only by the […]

8/6/2014 0 comment

suicide

by Katarinaaa 8/5/2014

written by Katarinaaa

i cant help but feel that no matter what i do what pills i take who i talk to it, its never gonna be good enough. suicidal thoughts will not go away, the only thing that makes them dissapear for a minute is self harm, i hope other people understand but nobody i know gets it.

8/5/2014 6 comments

Pills pills pills

by Remnant The Unbroken 8/5/2014

written by Remnant The Unbroken

I was prescribed Ativan for my anxiety, but wen I took it, that shit made me feel so horrible I thought I had relapsed back to day one, before admission to the hospital. So tonight since my urges to cut are bad still, and haven’t subsided at all….my mom suggested I take Xanax which has taken the place of Ativan. More then likely gonna zombify me since I took it with my Seroquel….ugh.

8/5/2014 13 comments

not gonna last much longer

by noobsaibot 8/2/2014

written by noobsaibot

so im socially awkward and im losing friends left and right,, im probly gonna die in a few months when i save up for a gun ..i lods my girlfriend of three years had to move out of her place (now shes a heroine addict) i was recently told by a pscycologist from my town that i fit the symtoms of adhd innattentive…which makes so much sense but im 24 now i feel like my life is ruined..i cant pay attention in conversation so now i avoid everyone…im afraid the doctor will think that im just out for drugs to sell..this is my last shot […]

8/2/2014 2 comments

Suicide forum

by robban 7/26/2014

written by robban

Anyone out there knows if theres a place where you could talk a little more freely about suicide than on SP? I want to be able to talk with serious people on a serious forum about suicide. I’ve been thinking about killing myself for eight years now. I tried once and failed. I dont want to make the same mistake again. If i try it again i dont want to die alone. I had depresion/anxiety/panic attacks frequently for most part of my life. I dont think its gonna get any better. I am alone. I dont have any friends. Why keep trying you know?

7/26/2014 7 comments

Tired

by T-Rex 7/25/2014

written by T-Rex

Tired of life, tired of trying, tired of it all. Geezer crispies, no matter what I do or say or anything, I fuck up and no one likes me. I try to help, I try to make them smile, I try to make people forget their problems and what not… it doesn’t work. I am hopeless, worthless, useless, disgusting, stupid, need to go. I’m unhelpful. I’m not able to BE helped. I wish I could just lay down and disappear for life, but, I can’t. I’m too chicken to suicide, I’m too cowardly to run away, I won’t do stupid shit. What the fuck am […]

7/25/2014 3 comments

what to do with time

by n0oh 7/25/2014

written by n0oh

I’m doing this today evening. Don’t know what to do now. I packed everything I’m gonna need (not much, I won’t have a lot to carry), now I just need to get dressed and then I’m leaving but I have no idea where and how should I spend all those hours until evening. Can’t talk to anyone today because I have a big mouth and I’d just tell them everything. I regret not finding a suicide partner a few days earlier, when I was thinking about it, a day spent with another person wouldn’t be so long and boring. I miss my friends so badly […]

7/25/2014 5 comments

slkjfdjlqp

by n0oh 7/22/2014

written by n0oh

My mother’s schizo finally did it, she can’t work anymore, still doesn’t admit she needs treatment, I don’t know if she’s taking her meds but knowing her it’s the last thing she’ll do, it’s way too nice to make my life even more of a hell. I can’t earn more, I can’t get a better job, or I can’t get a second job, whether she accepts it or not. Nobody understands me. I don’t, either. Why do I still care who’s gonna take care of her when I’m dead, I don’t know! I definitely don’t want to do anything for her anymore. Yet I still […]

7/22/2014 14 comments

Lost in Carcosa

by KinGinYelloW 7/20/2014

written by KinGinYelloW

…

7/20/2014 0 comment

not quite sure

by br0kensmiLe09 7/19/2014

written by br0kensmiLe09

I’m not quite sure of who I am.

sometimes I like to think that I am a perfectly fine teenager because isn’t the biggest symptom of madness denying you have a problem? if I admit to this I am probably not quite insane, am I?

but I’m too tired too tired to care too tired to live all I want is to fall into a deep slumber forever and ever…

its painful to wake up everyday dreading that you’re gonna live.

life has been deliriously tiring lately I don’t even know what I’m doing. sometimes I wish I could drag that blade across my wrist hard but no matter […]

7/19/2014 5 comments

Gods, falling.

by Bisban 7/18/2014

written by Bisban

Comrade. Somebody. Meet me at New Mexico.
Through the valley, of the shadow, and life. Oh, comrade. A dying saint.
Lucifer has captured me. Echo, abyssal, and oblivion.
Today, let me know. Progression, evolution.
To the death, is life. The whimsical and enchanted lost people.
My name is Morlock, but I am dead. The undead. Resuscitation.
The power, the sands of hell. Contort reality like a space wormhole.
In a world to conquer our fantasy. Here, in the mystery.
What’s going to happen, I don’t know, from where I am.

Yo, second hit it.

Let’s go, we gonna roll. Can we rock and roll.
One day, may […]

7/18/2014 0 comment

Beer beer entry 3

by tauruswrangler 7/18/2014

written by tauruswrangler

Entry 3

Beer beer I’m drinking beer. I’m gonna get drunk and overcome my fear.

I couldn’t afford it but that’s okay I don’t need money where I’m going anyway. Only a gold coin to pay the man so he can ferry me far away from this land.

All the bad memories and actions past, I’ll make them end very fast. The daily stresses and endless fights will surely be over after tonight. I’m done and spent I’ll tell you that. I don’t have to worry this beer will make me fat.

Goodbye mum goodbye dad I’m so sorry that I was so bad. Goodbye lover who was only […]

7/18/2014 2 comments

College

by i miss you 7/18/2014

written by i miss you

My girlfriend and I of over two years are going off to college this fall. She thought she was going to the same school as me until just a few weeks ago she decided to change for the better if her education. She going to a different state. We truly are in love and aren’t one of those bullshit high school relationships. I’m gonna miss her so much and she’s all il ever think about the entire time. Now I don’t even want to go to college. I just want to be with her. Any advice?

7/18/2014 10 comments

Just dont know how im going to get out of this rut

by andartarius 7/18/2014

written by andartarius

Time has gone by and no marked improvement of my depression…what am i gonna do with myself, those people on the phone told me that no depression lasts forever… i think they were lying just to make me stay and watch me suffer a little more. Pills pills pills, after pills, having to look at my family each day and fail them again and again and watching their face as they feel sorry for me…asking the sky for a miracle so i can stand on my own two feet and live on my own and not depend on others… well oh well…. how marvelous. these […]

7/18/2014 1 comment

Stabilizing Self

by RealTalk30 7/10/2014

written by RealTalk30

Hey, thanks for everyone who commented and talked to me on my last post. I’ve really come to some solid realizations that I need to start appreciating my life more and the things I love to do in this world. I need to find myself without the crutch of having some one else there to fill a void that needs no filling in the first place. That pursuit is not achievable! I’m not gonna pretend that I’m a whole person, because I haven’t found myself yet..I’m not secure with who I am yet. And I’m not gonna let that kill me, or drive me insane […]

7/10/2014 14 comments

Some1 write something interesting…

by RealTalk30 7/8/2014

written by RealTalk30

Or I’m gonna kill myself….right now!!

Ok maybe not…but ..just.. Idk!

7/8/2014 55 comments

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