Tag:

in pain

When you do it

by PariahMind 10/1/2014

written by PariahMind

Will you use your final act to help others in suffering? I am thinking of writing a concise message for the news to pick up on if they cover my death.

Depression and anxiety are real. Hug your friends. Learn to notice signs of depression (they can be hard to detect). Offer your own experiences with pain, and don’t give up on friends going through a rough time. You are likely much more important to them than you think you are.

Am I rambling?

The method must be drastic. I don’t know how specific I am allowed to be here, but I am inspired by the monks in […]

10/1/2014 6 comments

In Hospital Again

by anaboyred24 9/30/2014

written by anaboyred24

Well after another failed attempt on my life I’ve ended up back on a mental heath ward 25 miles from my own town. I cart do this again I cart stand it I cart do anythink right I cart even kill myself right. I’m lucky to be allowed my phone as the last time I was in hospital I was not. I’m Laying here thinking of away out but I don’t think it possible here and I don’t know how long I would have to stay here for.

I just cart take another day off how I am feeling it’s over 7 years now off the […]

9/30/2014 4 comments

Raw emotion

by StayingAnonymous 9/26/2014

written by StayingAnonymous

It’s been such a long time. Just by being back here I feel all the hidden pain come rushing to the surface. It’s fimilar, almost comforting.

I’m ashamed to be here. Understanding my depression, and facing it head on, was my greatest downfall in life. Yet somehow, I tamed the beast. I lived two years of happiness. Oh god, it was purely amazing. Looking back, it was remarkable, something I’d never thought possible. I cannot say that I’m angry it’s over, there’s no self pity here. I am grateful for the time I was given. I always knew in the back of my mind, that my […]

9/26/2014 2 comments

invisible me

by kateralia 9/24/2014

written by kateralia

Here’s what I mean. I just came back from going upto the shops. It took me 2hrs to walk up there & back. I walk in the door, everybody is downstairs & NOBODY notices me. I walk, or rather hobble, right infront of them & no one says anything. Its like I don’t exist until someone wants something from me!

I just want my old life back. Where I was happy, or could pretend easily, would go out every weekend, drink, make friends. Where noone told me I should do this or that, people needed me for help, but they would also help me. Where I […]

9/24/2014 2 comments

What I Have Seen

by Thatothersmightlive 9/23/2014

written by Thatothersmightlive

For those that read my previous post, you know that I’ve worked 30 health care as a respiratory therapist and paramedic. My username reflects the motto of a paramedic and the job I dedicated to do.

During that time, I’ve seen many times where lives were not saved but extended. People uncomfortable in pain sad and miserable is there to variety of tubes and machines. Often times lying in their own feces or urine with open wounds draining the most terrible smelling fluids.

Often times these patients were getting good care but you can’t stand over a patient 24 hours a day 7 days a week and […]

9/23/2014 8 comments

My way out.

by lonerhero 9/22/2014

written by lonerhero

I was very sick, that’s what started this and that’s what’s going to finish it. I was blind. All I have to do is stop taking my meds. I don’t know if it’ll be painless, I’m in pain now but I know it’ll be effective. It’ll be slow, but that’ll be my punishment. For there are a few things I wish to do before then.

9/22/2014 3 comments

Im a monster of this world but theres no end

by wraith31 9/19/2014

written by wraith31

I was made in this world, by unfairness… i lived my life in internats and thus life live practically with a hunched back, and now as a 31 year old with no actual friends, no girlfriend (i gave up there) (though i have a ex i dont want to talk about and shes not the reason for this but more of a final straw in a sense that made me really get bad physically after she broke up with me because i wouldnt have sex with her like a monkey but wanted to take things slow, im also a virgin, yes at my 31st and […]

9/19/2014 4 comments

by LetItGo 9/11/2014

written by LetItGo

a few weeks ago
i got into a fight with my sister

it was about telling my friends everything
and how supposedly that was super rude

and one time a friend called me
when i was at a family cabin thing

i went off and talked to her
she was in pain

i talked to her
i comforted her

then my sister said we were leaving
i didn’t hang up on my friend

I cared
i still care about her
and i couldn’t do that to her

when we got into the fight
she said it was rude to talk to my friend

i said that i cared about her so why not

9/11/2014 0 comment

Is it inevitable?

by OverIt13 9/11/2014

written by OverIt13

“You’re only 22, suicide is not the answer. Tons of life left ahead.”

Its easy for someone to say when they can’t fully understand what your going through, how you feel, or how you think. The suffering that goes on inside consistently. Its easy for people to say that suicide is the easy and selfish way out when they just don’t understand. Does it hurt to think about how much you would be putting your friends and family through when you decide to end your own life? Of course, but they can never truly get the pain and suffering that goes on internally.

I’m fortunate enough to […]

9/11/2014 3 comments

A place to tell my story

by oldnewsman 9/8/2014

written by oldnewsman

I have been in pain for years and I think about ending my life everyday. It’s not about wanting to die, but there is too much pain to handle any more. At this point I am trying to get things in order.

For me, the pain started decades ago when I was abused by priests. I tried to live with it, and for a long time I was able to cope. Unfortunately my mental health has deteriorated along with my physical health for many years and it is no longer a weight that I can carry. I have been diagnosed and re-diagnosed several times – enough […]

9/8/2014 6 comments

im getting much worse!

by insecure-wreck 9/2/2014

written by insecure-wreck

I hate how I’m in so much pain the muscles on my body are so tensed n I can’t even relax now I’m stuck in a loop of pain n misery my spine need to get better if not I will be in pain forever I don’t want that. I’m tired all the time I don’t like to be in so much pain I feel like I’m never going to get any better my spine n back are messing up my whole body n the bones everything is different my neck is forward but twisted the muscles are so everything is such a bothersome for […]

9/2/2014 2 comments

by insecure-wreck 8/29/2014

written by insecure-wreck

I hate being in pain my back n muscles hurt why. I really want to get better but I don’t know how long I can wait before I just give in my spine is curved it messing up my whole body because the spine has a whole bunch of nerves n it makes me feel awful about myself I don’t want this pain

8/29/2014 1 comment

i hate myself

by insecure-wreck 8/27/2014

written by insecure-wreck

My Body is hurting like crazy I hope my pain has a limit because I’m so tired of it all damn muscles spasms n it’s too much pain I have pills but I choose not to take them my spine n back feel like the springs on a slinky going forward I have a few friends I like to chat with n to maybe help me to get better in a way by making me laugh n at times I just don’t know whether I want to just throw in the towel n say I’m done with life it seems I’ve been waiting […]

8/27/2014 2 comments

my stepdad

by insecure-wreck 8/26/2014

written by insecure-wreck

I don’t know what it is about him that makes me feel worthless n nothing to him I have spinal scoliosis see he doesn’t seem to believe that n sees me as lieing about how much pain I’m in he has been my stepdad for about 10 years since I was in grade school I’m so tired of him I’ve been in pain from my spine n body for about 3 years but lately it’s just been getting worse I don’t know what to do I feel like giving up on life n he doesn’t care for I can see it in his eyes […]

8/26/2014 11 comments

Away…

by coconut-scent 8/23/2014

written by coconut-scent

The past few months have been really hard, with the experiences of my past and the relationships I have with my family now, I feel like I can’t go on with all of this rubbish.

I see a therapist to help me try to get back on track with my life and I take anti-depressants, but I feel like my reactions and emotions with what has happened is permanently seared into my heart and soul. Whenever I wake up and I get that painful stab in my chest, you the feeling of your heart literally breaking. I cry almost everyday, longest I have gone without crying […]

8/23/2014 1 comment

My miserable life

by pasdespoir 8/16/2014

written by pasdespoir

I can’t make friends. I’ve tried my whole life to blend in, to be like everyone else. But I just can’t. I thought I finally could make it. But it wasn’t a real friendship. People just want me to be available when they need me. But no one listens to me when I need company. I’m spending my days crying my heart out. Why does it happen to me? Why is everyone I’ve ever cared for happy and enjoying their lives and achieving their goals. Whereas I can’t do it. I’m not meant to do it.
I was so desperate and so in pain that […]

8/16/2014 9 comments

Tired

by madmare 8/11/2014

written by madmare

How sick does one have to be in order to qualify for assisted suicide medications. I really have nothing to live for and am basically a log in my bed. I don’t want to die in pain. I want to be at peace when I go. I was planning on getting Helium tomorrow but I have read that that method fails if not done right. I want it to be successful the first time around and dont want to survive the attempt only to be sick and have an excruciating headache. This isn’t a cry for help or an attempt at getting sympathy. I just […]

8/11/2014 6 comments

My Story

by Solarion 8/7/2014

written by Solarion

Hi, everyone. I just joined this site. I just NEED to tell someone about my feelings. I’m 15, male, and ready to die. I haven’t lived a hard life, so some might find me selfish, Whatever. I’ve been fighting my depression for four years now, I had counseling once, and I felt better for a while. But it didn’t last. I’m ugly, boring, and not always a good person outside, but hidden deep within myself is the heart of a saint. And this cold, dark world has chewed me up, spit me out, and pissed on the remains. My family is a good one, My […]

8/7/2014 3 comments

Boyfriend killed himself, I just want to be free from pain too

by singe52114 8/5/2014

written by singe52114

My first time on here so please bare w me. I’m 36, was married at 23 to an emotionally abusive man. After many years of medications, therapy, hospitalization, failed suicide attempt, family pissed, lost most friends, finally left him, was happier than I’d ever been in my life….. Was fine being alone…. Friends came back into my life… Wasn’t looking for anything, enjoying new found freedom…. And then, my dearest friend since I was 18 suddenly back in my life, he saw change in me, gave him hope to get out of equally horrible marriage, we grew much closer and evolved into romantic relationship. […]

8/5/2014 4 comments

i found it

by noir 8/4/2014

written by noir

I found the only thing stronger than grief, pain, and despair its name is what we call fear

On the 31 of july i woke up whit just one thougth on my head the thougth of dying i planned everything that very morning, yeah i even wrote here i just needed to talk myself off before well you know crossing over, im not a writer so im going to say the things as they happened and everything i felt on my self frustrated “try”

I phone called my gradfather in order to check if he was going to be in home (nobody suspect my condition, yeah im […]

8/4/2014 3 comments

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