I’m not here,
I’m not there.
You can’t find me anywhere.
I have left,
I have gone.
Cause everyday
made my life wrong.
What people do,
what people say.
†I hate uâ€,
†Go away.â€
I tried to keep calm,
and have no fear.
But it got too much,
so i disappeared.
I took a rope,
and made a bow.
Put it around my neck,
and just let go.
For a second there was pain,
but soon there was no more.
As the life in me left,
my body went limp and poor.
Nobody knows,
nobody cares.
I’m transparent,
as thin as air.
People’s […]
Standing here
all alone.
Everyone left me.
I’m on my own.
what did I do?
What did I say?
To make them go
so far away.
Nobody wants me.
They don’t care.
They say mean things,
and give an evil stare.
IT really hurts,
inside and out.
I just want one thing
to change my life’s route.
I want someone to love me.
One who’s life i’ll share.
Someone who’s always with me.
Someone who’s always there.
I know who it is.
It’s always been you.
So kind so brave so bold.
The one who’s always true.
I want you in my life.
perhaps one […]
Bieng someone who has struggled with suicidal tendencies up until about 3 years ago, i have attempted suicide at least a dozen times and numerous other careless acts against my body i know the struggles and know that it can get better. I am 21 years old have been severely physically and mentally abused by my father my entire childhood from being and infant till i moved out when i was 18. He has come at me with an axe on several occasions, beaten me with peices of wood numerous times, ( like a 2 by 4) broken my guitar on me,kicked me(normally with his […]
This is my second post on this site and again I am speaking of my girlfriend that broke up with me a few months ago. For a background on the situation please read my previous post to save me explaining it in this one.
So far life has got worse and worse, the last time I was happy was October 19th last year when I took her to a hotel and the rest for her bday which was on the 6th but I was busy working (to get more money to spend on her for her bday). I hadn’t spoke to her since the 12th of […]
Someone asked me that today, and I had no valid answer to give. The truth is I don’t know why, I don’t know why I have such a hard time doing the right things. I can have every reason to walk away but I always find that tiny reason to stay and I cling on to it. I can know that the situation is completely wrong and I know that I am hurting myself by clinging to that bit of hope. Yet I still hold on for dear life and I don’t truly know why. Maybe I’m afraid maybe I’m absolutely terrified of accepting the […]
The love of my life has left me for another man. I have spent my life living for her, with her and beside her. How the hell do i just continue living without her? I am alone and i am depressed. Friends, Family, they cant understand. Everyone say the same message, everything will be better in time. I say everything could be better in time. But the now is what is too painful. Theres no one i can tell my thoughts to, theres no one left to trust. When shes the only person I could ever been completely open to and trust. I want to […]
Wow, where to begin? I guess i can start off by saying this is not normal for me. Iv always been that girl that’s strong when nobody else is. Iv had straight As through high school and iv participated in a lot of sports and other activities. Iv been through many relationships, being dumped and doing the dumping. I lost the love of my life about 4 months ago, he was my rock, my support. He came into my life when things weren’t good at home, just when i was ready to say i couldn’t take it anymore.. the last 3 years iv depended on […]
Are you ready to sell it?
How much do you think you can value your life for?
What if so called leaders did a blunder and sold earth for $xyz? —
Hence, I believe humans are stupid because they choose some humans as super humans and call them as leaders
What if newton show-up and say there is nothing called gravity and all 3 rules are bullshit. Same way as Stephen hawking did “all black-hole concept is wrong and there is new thing called grey-holes”
Therefore if you wait for other human to save you, your life worth zero.
Sorry if how I post is a bit unusual, but for me my life is unusual. I am always scared to talk about myself, I find it to be too selfish for me but for others it is fine. I have decided to slowly tell my story in bits and pieces where you don’t need to read any other post to understand what I am talking about but in order to understand my life if it interests you in any way, and I don’t see how it would I just wanted to type something so someone can see how I feel because I hide it […]
I wanted to come here for a repost, as if once was not enough.
I’m a middle aged woman (55) whose life was wrecked by a cancer diagnosis followed by a divorce. Combo hit hard. Back then, I was tearful and melodramatic, and wrote a tearful and melodramatic post. Happily, that’s over. That is a distinct plus.
Another plus: I’ve lost my faith. I no longer believe in a life after death, and that’s a very freeing thing.
I have, I believe, been a good mother to my kids who are pretty happy, pretty well adjusted, and pretty clueless. This is a major plus 🙂
Meanwhile, I’m as suicidal […]
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Do not post for suicide partners or discuss specific suicide methods
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This is what I read upon arrival. Is this a joke? Don’t post hateful things? THATS WHAT SUICIDAL PEOPLE DO! It’s MY life and I hate it and everything it stands for and everything it might stand for because others always think they have the right to tell me what to do then they turn and hightail it through their brainwashed cerebral psyche feeling proud that they stuck their nose into my business then run me up the […]
I’m not suicidal, just incredibly bored with life. I think that I’ve played too many video games, watched too many movies, cartoons throughout my life that I expect grand things out of reality. But as we all know, things are pretty mundane on planet Earth(save for wars and terrorist attacks; those are always good for a laugh).
Things are pretty sucky in my life right now. I’m living with an ex-girlfriend that my ego is still very much attached too. She’s an annoying **** but I enjoyed the sex, and like I said, she really knew how to stroke my ego and make me feel […]
Im living this life that isnt even mine. I dont know what im living for anymore..I was once a happy little girl but everything chance for me im not the same person anymore….how do I get my life back?
You see that girl? She looks so happy, right? Telling jokes, smiling, having a great time and… Dying inside. She’s hurt, And tired. Tired of the drama, tired of not being good enough, tired of life. But she doesn’t want to look dramatic, weak and attention seeking. So she keeps it all inside. Acts like everything’s perfect but cries at night. So everyone thinks that she’s a happiest person they know. That she has no problems and her life is perfect. If only they knew the trust…  :’(
I can’t do this anymore, I really can’t…
I wish I […]
You say you understand but do you, do you feel the razor inside you?
Feel the demons around your head floating, finding every little thing you cant do, everything wrong with you,
Do you?
You see it’s like the disease is haunting me over and over and over, every day of my life i cant even have a good time.
But you understand.
Don’t you?
Every night I would hold a loaded 9mm to head, I never had the fucking balls to pull the trigger. I kept going to work, see people, paying bills …. I got dropped from insurance and ran out of LAMICTAL,, oh well. I started to get a new life in order, a tiny bit of exercise via biking around SF. I feel ok, not great, but ok, which is awesome since I’ve wanted to off myself for 20 years and my girl friend did so with me present. life is full of crazy shit, things can get better. stay busy.
How do other people manage? Â Going about the mindlessness of life. Â I guess they drink themselves silly and distract themselves with other meaningless things. Â Squabbles over stupid crap or finding something they can say serves as an interest or something they can tell an interviewer they do in their free time. Â Even though all of this essentially serves no purpose, at least they have other people and money and can put aside for a moment the general zombification of being a wage slave, the growing dissatisfaction with Western life.
I can feel the pain building inside me, even though they’ve tried to numb me to it. […]
Today just couldn’t get any worse. Finally I get all ready for work, only to forget my bus card.. Go back home look around and still nothing..
What else can fucking go wrong in my life?
I’ve found that the more I slice myself the pain takes my mind off what’s happening in this world.. It would just be easier to just to end things quick but i will get there.. Eventually I will get there
this depression i cant get over. im almost 23 years old n life isnt life anymore. 10 years of this bullshit. numerous attempted suicides. july 5, 2012 i thought was it for me. i had taken 60+ pills. i just didnt care anymore. at one point i had it all. a job, school, living in my own apartment. today im jobless, living at home with my parents who could care less about my problems, and a single parent. that day i woke up and had completely given up on life. i remember the paramedics trying to talk to me. i was to drugged up for […]
I don’t know why I’m still here… but I’m still here.
Pills aren’t working. I still feel the same way as I did the night I did it. I am focusing on me and what I want… which I’m finding isn’t much. Maybe if I wanted more out of life I could find more.