So im really heartbroken that my now x bf the one that helped me with everything and to get back up and feel good about my self has been cheating on me from the very beginning. Ill be taking my leave for about 2 days or maybe 2 weeks but ill try to get on a write something good for you guys. Good bye.
Covering your ears to prevent the assault of my screams
You don’t want to acknowledge the betrayal
Just the self righteous smile plastered smugly on your face
Now it’s time for the tables to turn
Time for you to feel how badly this burns
Through my heart, through my soul
And now that all is lost, especially my self control
I want you to know my pain
I want you to feel it dripping down your face
I want you to taste it on your lips
I hope you like what you see
Because you’re the one that did this to me
My mom never loved me and she lets it be known, my sister molested me, and refuses to own up after so many years, were f”ing grown now I’ve tried to kill myself several times I thought u would be apart of my recovery “sister” after all these years of protecting u, please help me. Nope she won’t no body will, my dad told me he loved me twice in my 25 yrs of living, my younger brother tells me how disgusted he is of me because of my drinking and everything else about me, there is no sweet escape, all my friends have abandon […]
I just can’t trust one of my friends.They keep going to the school guidance officer and telling him every little bit of information I tell them about me.I am really getting sick of , yesterday one of their parents actually rang the deputy principal and told him I was gonna hurt my self, I never even said that to anyone so where are they getting that information from.Today my mum got a phone call from the guidance officer saying that one of my friends parents printed out pictures of things I posted on Instagram, why can’t they just mind their own business and stop making […]
for some reason. the music artist Eminem knows exactly what to say.
hes a roll model to me.
i dont care about his past. and things that he has done.
he just gets to ppl. (i think)
hes the only person that knows how to keep my head up
i just listin to his music and listin to see what he went through and i think to my self i dont have that and if he can keep everything going then can i.
he talks about his life. and how he gets through it telling you to keep your head up to. and gives advise!
if […]
I’m positive that feeling alone is universal, but that seems to be the force behind my depression. Like being together with people yet being isolated. As if I purposely hold myself back from being alive or living metaphorically of course. To me life is punishment. ironically I am a hypocritical hypocrite. I say I hate stuff and then I do that stuff and hate myself for hating to do it will hating myself for thing my self. Did any of that make sense? Self loathing comes and goes a lot, but I sit here thinking of obscure ways to end it all….and I stare at my […]
If your reading this i just need to get this out
I miss feeling loved, needed or cared about. Â I had this freidn that would make me fill like I was the most special person on the world that I was worth more than a million bucks. Â But now I think I’m obsessed over this girl. Â We were so close, both helping each other with life and our difficult pasts. Â But then someone close to her died and she just stopped caring about me. Â WE use to write letter to each other every day but when i mention them to her you think they were the […]
It took me awhile to realize that I only ever come on this site when ever I’m down. I wish I could come here just ONCE and say “hey am doing well ” and I though that I was.. I think I’ve been doing good. I mean I haven’t been cutting my self. But am sad all the time. A while back I was sitting in my room cutting my self in the dark. And my mom walked in. So I took the razor and shoved it under my pillow and all she did was. Sat on the bed. Pulled me into her […]
So my dad’s found about my self-harm and suicidal stuff
And I have to go a counselor every Tuesday
Does this mean everythings starting to heal? Or will everything I’ve been trying to build (my life) crumble back to dust back when I first got depressed? This is probably my paranoia, Â just don’t know what’s gonna happen
I feel like I can get better, but my family is constantly fighting and it gets so bad I have to actually leave for hours at a time so I can just get away, I’m lucky I don’t pass anything I can use for self-harm, I don’t even know […]
‘Ring’ ‘ring’ ‘ring’. I woke up at the sound of my alarm. ” oh gosh , it is still 6:30 am ” . I checked my phone I had no messages from my friends . “That’s weird , my friends used to talk to me everyday! ” I wondered to myself . I took a bath , brushed my teeth and prepared some delicious pancakes with my coffee .
As I was enjoying my sweet breakfast and listening to the sound of the birds , my friend vikki called . […]
I am so close to having every thing I ever truly wanted, so why do I still want to kill my self….why am I rejecting life
2/22/14
Id like to be able to think ill wake up tomorrow and be happy and forget that i feel the way i do and have for the past years of my life. I know that wont happen. I often look at myself in disgust and think about how much I’ve fucked up. I waste to much time doing this when i should be doing this. My future seems like a hell hole. I don’t see me Completing any of my dreams because i just cant come to think i’m good at fucking anything and it makes me want to just fucking give up. I have […]
Every time I close my eyes I see my self doing something I can’t possibly imagine ever doing. It’s as if death is the only way I could ever become happier. Suicide is something I would always be afraid of. Not until this year did I ever imagine it would be possible and not until about last month did I ever actually try it. Sometimes I feel like pills and blades and alcohol are my only friends, until I wake up bleeding or not remembering anything I did. Granted, I do have friends and family who love me but there words of encouragement are sometimes […]
Every day I go threw the same thing, constantly being picked on and being asked things like “Why can’t you be like everyone else?” or “Why can you just be normal?” or “Get over it you have no reason to feel bad.”
But I don’t want to be normal, or like everyone, and I do have reasons to feel bad… Every year I move some where new because of my parents money problems, I am all ways alone and forgotten about, and just wish to die sometimes…
I have tried cutting, but get caught before there is even a mark on me… I have tried using a […]
im 14 and i did something stupid along time ago and because of it. my family had to move out of the country and then my dad lost his job and it had continued to go downhill from there. i cant take it anymore. i want it to end but i cant leave. i cant brig my self to the jump. but im getting closer each time and im sick of it!. i gone down a long road of self harm and alcohol. everyone blames me and all i can think about is that i deserve it!
I’m in agony right now…every movement is pain and I know it’s going to be ten times worse tomorrow morning. Hopped up on myprodol, tramacet and coxflam and not even a slight improvement. If this keeps up, I’m gona accedentally suicide on the pain-killers…though I fear it might turn into full blown attempt if the pain gets any worse…and it’s going to. The fact that I am burning up from the widespread inflammation doesn’t help either. I’m hot, sticky, in agony, miserable, unable to move and confined to my room so I can turn on the fan…family is actually feeling cold…I’m feeling like I’m boiling.
I […]
I hate bad weather days… I am absolutely useless on days like today. My whole body is in pain and I can’t focus. I want so much to do things but I can’t…it’s like my hand-brake is on and I am smoking rubber trying to get anywhere. Sometimes I just want to curl up into a corner and cry my self to sleep. Yesterday, on a post challenging all of us to tell the truth of how we feel, I mentioned that I had a arthritis flair…well this is why… I can forecast bad weather days ahead of time.
I wonder sometimes how much my physical […]
everyday … everyday i go into college i feel so judge , that i don’t belong where i am . in my college class everyone has there friends … i do have mine to but they are all older then me by a couple of years but now its got to a point where everyone is turning on me ..i don’t know why or what i have done wrong … i was just being my self i guess . i cant tell my parents or my boyfriend .. not even my tutor , i have given up hope because no will understand, i know […]
I am one of those people who feel good when I cut and injure myself. I have done this for many years and have Gotten so good at hiding it. I can’t stop doing it. It’s
Like I need it to feel. I just don’t cut anymore, I now slice my flesh off. I know I’m not alone doing this type of thing to my self but I bet I have been doing it longer than most on here. Lol
i finally asked the question lurking in my heart for weeks since our break up.. since the moment he asked me out. I asked his best friend.. ” he only wants me for sex.. doesnt he?..”
cody: yes but dont tell him i told you this.. he likes six other girls and when you didnt put out he broke it off im so sorry.. just forget about him please.
Rape victim and now played by the guy i loved most. I’m only a sex object. Thats all people […]
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