Like all humans the boy had limits.Limits to what he could do.but also limits to what he could take and after all the time that had passed he finally understood one fact.He would always be alone.the boy had tried harder than most people would have…he tried harder than he should have….he gave up.he was done.he decided to not care anymore.he cut himself off.he showed nothing.that darkness in his heart had once again warped him.his face grew blank.no smiling.no more crying.nothing…he gave in to the lonliness.he kept it all inside.his feelings of pain and resentment and sadness…he decided to close them in his heart and pretend […]
Tag:
no matter what
Its so hard to understand something you just cant get a grip on.take life for example,it truly is a beautiful thing…but at the same time it can be so….cruel.emotions are a great subject.they make us happy and sad….angry and loving.and yet it is these very same emotions that can do so much damage.let me ask you a question.why?….why is it that we’re given happiness on a silver plater just so it can be ripped away?…why is it that this emotion called happiness is dangled in the face of those who can never have it?.To me the answer is clear…you have to fight….the happiness you may […]
i cant help but feel that no matter what i do what pills i take who i talk to it, its never gonna be good enough. suicidal thoughts will not go away, the only thing that makes them dissapear for a minute is self harm, i hope other people understand but nobody i know gets it.
I’ve spent the last 5 years dealing with depression. My mom never tried to help me and it seemed like the only person who cared was my older brother. He was the one who always drove me to therapy and he was the one who took me to the hospital after I tried to kill myself. After I moved away from him to live with my grandmother I couldn’t find anyone who cared. In the last 2 years since I’ve moved I have tried to kill myself 3 times. I realized by the third time there was some reason I was failing and I figured […]
I hear all these people who talk about God’s plan for people, and how everything that happens is by “His” will. Personally I don’t really believe in that, for a couple reasons.
#1 If everything really is all part of a plan, then there would never be any cause for worry about consequences. This site is full of people who think that suicide is an acceptable way to end your life (I’m included in that category) but most of society especially religious nuts talk about how its such a sin. But if you do end up killing yourself, isn’t that part of the plan too? So […]
I’ve been told to look to the future, but I feel so cramped now. My past can make me cry on the spot and the pain in the past is so unbearable I look to options that are frowned upon. The present is also unbearable, being tired and stressed out, and my future only holds ridiculous amounts of stress. The future is just, too much. I don’t even want to think about next week let alone the upcoming years. Even when I’m in my thirties, I’m going to have this stress. How are we supposed to live like this?
How can you get on with your […]
Like all humans the boy had limits.Limits to what he could do.but also limits to what he could take and after all the time that had passed he finally understood one fact.He would always be alone.the boy had tried harder than most people would have…he tried harder than he should have….he gave up.he was done.he decided to not care anymore.he cut himself off.he showed nothing.that darkness in his heart had once again warped him.his face grew blank.no smiling.no more crying.nothing…he gave in to the lonliness.he kept it all inside.his feelings of pain and resentment and sadness…he decided to close them in his heart and pretend […]
i am nothing. every since my best friend Danny died my life has become less than shit. he was the person i could talk to when i had no one else who i could. my family hates me and its like no matter what i do i can never make them happy more or less me. i miss him so much and it seem like everyday i have to find a reason to stay on this earth. ive tried so many times to die and i come so close every time but someone ends up saving me somehow. that doesnt mean they love me. i […]
rember i said sometimes;
ive been in lots of them.. some times there meanigful, some times there just for sex, and sometimes there just because you need someone to sit there and complement you all the fucking time… witch is okay, because some times its okay.
right now i am in a relashonship with nick, this is one of those meaningful ones.. before this one i had a boynamed john and all he wanted was sex and i am not secure with my body enough to do that sooo…. there for i dont think i will ver have sex . but some one should always have someone […]
Honest question, one I’ve never had the guts to ask, but I feel like it’s safe to ask here. I grew up ugly, emotionally abused and neglected. It’s all I knew, and every bit of good I did ( raising my sister, joining the Coast Guard, being a good friend no matter what it cost me) was in spite of where and what I came from, not because of it. And I’m tried of fighting against everything I was raised in, just to be a good person. It takes all of my effort just to be normal, and sometimes it doesn’t feel like its worth it. […]
It’s been what about a month?
I’m not going to say it’s been too long.
Because it hasn’t.
And that may hurt some of you, but I’m not sorry.
Because I’m starting to get better.
Suicidal thoughts do not cloud my mind anymore.
Thoughts of no one caring are not there.
I know some people care.
And I know some people don’t.
I have accepted that.
For those who don’t care I toss them away.
My friend once said to get rid of the toxic people.
So I do.
But sometimes it doesn’t go as well as planned.
Sometimes my friends get mad at me.
If you ever need anything, no matter what it is, please email me, breannakienzle@gmail.com. I would love to help you in any way I can. Even if you just need to get something off your chest, I promise I won’t judge you because I’ve done many things that I’m not proud of. Please talk to me if you want to, I would love to help.
I want to leave this world but I am afraid of what might be next, it could be worse. I mean I am a believer but I don’t understand a lot about it, like why is the punishment so severe? I mean no matter what you’re guilty of, an eternal punishment on any level doesn’t seem right, I mean time here is so finite, and any thing you did wrong should in enough time be cleared but eternal damnation?, and for many all they did was get depressed and off themselves, I mean shouldn’t there be some sort of limit to the punishment? Suppose I […]
Does anyone else agree that when someone says suicide is a cowardly thing? I feel that if your in the position your in and few the way you feel, you way the facts and think about everything. I feel it’s actually a very hard thing to do. And another thing is. How do you feel when you final have the power to talk to someone close to you and ask for help, but all they say is I can’t talk to you anymore if your going to do that cuz I don’t want to be apart of it. I feel that is that person truly […]
Today was the first day in several months I woke up NOT feeling severely suicidal. I’ve been trying really hard to break through these feelings of worthlessness and find a way to make a life for myself no matter what the cost. But it’s clear to me now that everyone absolutely fucking despises me and I deserve to be in a box underground. The first thing that happens is I log into facebook and my brother’s wife (one of the only people in my life) logs off IMMEDIATELY when she sees i’m online. Second, I ask a customer service person where to find royal mail boxes […]
I’m just so done with this stupid life. I’ve never fit in no matter what. I suck at life and want to die. I have no purpose or meaning in my life. I’m a failure and all I do is suck at life. The only purpose to my life is that of being a fucking loser nobody. I hate myself.
I’m never going to have friends. Nobody likes me. I’m drinking to numb my pain before another suicide attempt.
I’m going to try a variety of things tonight. I don’t belong here in this world and don’t know why I’m even here.
all that I am good at […]
Tonight I found myself driving my brother home because my uncle had made a statement implying that we’re both wasters living off the state. My brother was seething with anger and rejected the notion but for me it’s put things into perspective. All my life I’ve made excuses for myself and thought that I should be judged less harshly because I have a learning disability and suffer from anxiety and depression. I thought my family should love me no matter what. But now I realise the world doesn’t give a fuck about my problems, my weaknesses, or the bad cards it’s dealt. Â I can’t afford […]
No support from Parents, No Friends, No Girlfriend, No Job, Nothing is as expected… Please I want to die
by AbhishekShah
written by AbhishekShah
My mom told me that she could have killed me when she was pregnant. In my school I was bullied continuously for 3 years. I had operation twice due to some health issues and unfortunately I couldn’t complete my college. I’ve worked really hard from childhood to get my dream job, now I’m feeling like a failure. I wish my parents would encourage me and support me a bit but they always put me down. They compare me with other children from the childhood, and my mom always hit me with a stick even when it wasn’t my fault. No love from them but God […]
I cant stand my life anymore. Ever since i lost my dad my depression and anxiety have gotten worse and no matter what problems arise i always just grin and bear it act like it dont bother me. I would have ended long ago if not for my mother, i know it would just destroy her. So im forced to continue living my miserable life
Moby – The Sky Is Broken (Markus One Strings Works Remix)
The song is preparing me for the incoming advent with one rule; rather burn out than fade away so it’s full throttle or nothing.
Love for life is gradually fading and the sunsets are getting lesser. As far as I’m concerned – I’m almost done. Can’t fight the endless war of growing pain. I just might get lucky and get a heart attack; death is coming soon for me nevertheless – just pray the God that my demise will be painless. I fear of no death, but the pain.
Maybe this suicide mania of my mine wasn’t […]