Tag:

pain

Tears (feat. Chataway)

by bullfrog 4/15/2014

written by bullfrog

New poem. Had some help this time from SP’s very own Chataway.

Like usual, poem is beneath the audio for those that can’t decipher an Australian accent.

Tears

Bullfrog:

So it’s taken me a while but I’ve come to a realisation
that the worst thing one can have in life is expectations.
It’s like a revelation that all the heartache in my life has been of my own creation.
Being broke wouldn’t be a disappointment if I hadn’t expected wealth
and finding it difficult to move wouldn’t dismay had I not expected health.
Being lonely wouldn’t tear at the heart of my very worth had I never trusted and […]

4/15/2014 3 comments

It’s not the coward’s way out.

by joseph1976 4/14/2014

written by joseph1976

Suicide is not the coward’s way out. You’re leaving what you know to go somewhere you don’t. The ones who wait and wait and wait for it to get better and it never does, those are the cowards. I am not a coward. And I’m ready to end my life and kill the pain.

4/14/2014 3 comments

she’ll be dead by then

by LetItGo 4/13/2014

written by LetItGo

my parents dont understand what ive been through
my sister has made my throat ache because of me yelling at her to leave me alone
she does not listen despite me screaming at her to leave me be
she does not see the pain she has inflicted upon the young girl
she is so oblivious to the girl that crumbles each day until one day
she will be nothing and she will die
people around this young girl are oblivious too
they do not see the bruises that hide under her long sleeves
the red slap marks that she has hidden under concealer
the red […]

4/13/2014 1 comment

I want to end it, but I always balk at the last moment…

by lazarus 4/12/2014

written by lazarus

I’ve been suicidal since the age of 14. I’m now 36. I’ve spent 22 years fighting the pain daily, trying to tell myself to just get through the next day, looking towards the future, grasping at any tiny thread of hope. But the depression is always there. I haven’t fulfilled my potential in life – I was a straight A student, socially adept with many friends, good-looking, and liked by most people. I could have done anything I’d wanted to with my life.

I feel that what I want is always just within reach, but then the monster of depression will latch on to my mind, […]

4/12/2014 7 comments

Extremes

by heartcore 4/10/2014

written by heartcore

Exaggerations… Using words like, “never”, “always”, “nothing”, “everything”, “nobody”, “everyone”… Those are lies.

There are certainties like heat, and gravity, and the concept of time. Sure. Those are irrelevant.

But apathy and ambivalence are illusions to hide pain and pleasure. Sorrow and joy… These are human.

This is – simply – you.

And it is your right to enjoy your existence.

The reason you demand satisfaction is because “happiness” is the truth.

I know who I am. I feel. I’m alive. And sometimes, just sometimes I don’t want that. I’m real.

I need you to be real with me.

Love,
HeartCore

4/10/2014 1 comment

i hate myself

by jocie13 4/10/2014

written by jocie13

I hate my self so much I just want to die life is hell please if I could just feel better maybe I wouldn’t need to die anymore my life just causes pain and that is the last thing I want to do I don’t want to die anymore I need to it seems like the only ending

4/10/2014 0 comment

by wishthingsweredifferent 4/10/2014

written by wishthingsweredifferent

I want it. I want it so bad today. More than I’ve ever wanted it. To take the pills. I want them all. A sweet, beautiful mixture. The one that can end it all. No more pain, no more stress, no more hurt. I want it. I want it all to be over. Do I reach for them? There they are so close at hand. I have the solution to all my problems yet I am afraid to solve them. Always wary of the end results. One day I won’t be. One day I’ll be brave and end it all. One day I’ll […]

4/10/2014 1 comment

failure

by AnotherAnon 4/7/2014

written by AnotherAnon

Why is it that when a woman cries for help, she is immediately assisted, but shouldÂ a male seek a shoulder to lean on he is weak? We are just a frail as are feminine counterparts, the only difference is it is socially unacceptable to be weak and frail, as a result, we hide our pain to avoid further ridicule.

I’ve failed time and time again.

The woman that I love with all of my heart is married, and lives in another state. I’m the other man, and even as such, i’m unsure of my importance to her. Be it because of self-esteem, or because of previous relationships […]

4/7/2014 7 comments

First, do no harm.

by anticsinsemantics 4/7/2014

written by anticsinsemantics

My body is destroying itself. Suicide would only speed up the process that had begun the day I was born.

I have a chronic illness. On a typical day, I wake up feeling as though I haven’t slept, struggle to get ready for work, barely get through work, and have to crash as soon as I get back home, sometimes without so much as eating. If I’m lucky, the pain is at a 5/10 or below. If I’m not so lucky, it’s at at least an 8 and climbing the longer I push myself through a day. Apparently my 8 is a normal person’s 10/10.

Right now […]

4/7/2014 2 comments

Cupboard

by marz 4/7/2014

written by marz

One more time won’t hurt,

I’m scum, evil, dirt.

So many flashbacks,

Boy there are stacks and stacks.

Which one to think about now?

How about the one where dad called you a cow?

Reach for the box,

The box is heavy feeling as if its full of rocks.

Flashback to the last time just how much you were sick

And how you felt like such an absolute prick.

Remembering the pain,

What did that gain?

Stomach being pumped,

For what, just because you got dumped?

These thoughts just won’t go away,

As for tomorrow is just another day.

4/7/2014 0 comment

expectations

by jocie13 4/6/2014

written by jocie13

Expectations have destroyed me it’s hurts to be here anymore every one thinks I act this way for attention (and by every one I mean my parents) I’ve tried confessing to my parents but my Mom just yelled at me and told me it’s normal I should just get used to it but I don’t want to be used to this pain and unhappiness I’ve felt for ten years my dad took a whole different approach he threatened to take my doors off and get my admitted in an insane asylum I know it’s not normal the way I feel but I have no one […]

4/6/2014 0 comment

I Dreamed A Dream

by Frozen In Time 4/5/2014

written by Frozen In Time

I want a peaceful passing. No drama. No pain. All my life I’ve only been pretending. People tell me to follow my desires. To do what I want. I want my sufferings to end. I just cannot cope anymore.

Personally was never a cutter. Carbon monoxide is what I’ll use.

I’m doing the world a favour by dying.

4/5/2014 1 comment

I cut myself with a jagged kitchen knife yesterday

by BreathofBrandyandDeath 4/5/2014

written by BreathofBrandyandDeath

It was my first time. With the blood the tears began to roll again. Is this your effects of cutting – releasing emotional pain?

4/5/2014 7 comments

Cutters Lullaby…

by CrimsonDream 4/4/2014

written by CrimsonDream

Go to sleep and close your eyes,

and dream of broken butterflies,

that tore there wings against a thorn,

you know the pain that they have bourne.

Sliver metal shine so bright,

scarlet blood that feels so right,

dream of blood trickling down,

and wake up before you drown.

The moonlight shining off your tears,

as you bleed out your worst fears,

so tonight when you start to cry ,

whisper the cutters lullaby:

Hushabye baby , your almost dead,

you don’t have a pulse and your pillow is red,

4/4/2014 2 comments

Numbness

by Allabi 4/4/2014

written by Allabi

Been crying for two days straight, can’t deal with the pain no more.
I really tried but seems I’m not strong enough

4/4/2014 1 comment

Knowing

by stillhopeless 4/3/2014

written by stillhopeless

I have seen how suicide affects others, I know the pain left behind. I have seen people fall apart after a loved one takes their lives, I have seen it for myself.
I know that it’s a permanent fix to temporary problems. I know how selfish it seems. I know that even though my pain will be gone I will leave pain for others.
I know all of this yet it’s still all I can think about. How I will do it. When it would be the best time. Where. What I would say to everyone, how I would say it. What people would think.

4/3/2014 1 comment

brain suicide?..

by winterrain98 4/3/2014

written by winterrain98

Starting to wonder if you keep living a life full of suffering and stress if your brain doesnt just shut down on its own because it cant take anymore. Â Destroy itself. Â Always had memory and concentration problems and sometimes a memory lapse Â cuz of my depression problems now i am just really disabled cuz of them. Â But i am also in the worse place of my life for the last Â couple of years. Â I have felt traumatizing pain over and over. Â I cant remember one day from the next anymore. Â I cant rem if things happened today or yesterday or the day before. Â my brain […]

4/3/2014 0 comment

An Exhibition of Disloyalty

by breaking_the_cycle 4/2/2014

written by breaking_the_cycle

Covering your ears to prevent the assault of my screams

You don’t want to acknowledge the betrayal

Just the self righteous smile plastered smugly on your face

Now it’s time for the tables to turn

Time for you to feel how badly this burns

Through my heart, through my soul

And now that all is lost, especially my self control

I want you to know my pain

I want you to feel it dripping down your face

I want you to taste it on your lips

I hope you like what you see

Because you’re the one that did this to me

4/2/2014 0 comment

Catch 22

by Reviarg 4/1/2014

written by Reviarg

I’m depressed and fantasize about suicide because the medical community can’t tell me why I’m in pain or how to fix my pain. However, they won’t prescribe me medication to deal with the pain because I’m depressed and fantasize about suicide. The never ending cycle of “screw me,” continues.

4/1/2014 11 comments

The pain I endur.

by anders87 4/1/2014

written by anders87

I do not know where to start.
my soul is like a single dark room. How can I escape this pain?
it empties all of the energy and desire to live. I do not know why everything in my life to be so negative? it’s like a tunnel with no light just me and myself, with no way to change, only a single path. in between I see a faint light shining faintly, only to discover that it is just a small crack in the wall before the track goes straight into the deep dark.

Is suicide the only resolution?? I have endured this pain for […]

4/1/2014 0 comment

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