im so tired of everything. i always feel like crap. my parents yell at me constantly and i feel like im not wanted. i just dont think theres a reason anymore. i tried to kill myself today. but i ran out of pills. it wouldnt have an effect. i want to die. i just want to end everything.
Tag:
Parents
My home situation have been very tough. As little girl I had every lie through at home. My mom has/had a relationship with an other man. My dad does everything at home cooking, laundry, bringing me and my 2 brothers to bed and school etc. My mom never does that and never gives us love. And my dad doesn’t too, he just does the standard stuff. She denies that she has a relationship with the other man. They are just friends she says. I just saw the man a couple months ago for the first time (never want to again). But people have seen them […]
I don’t know what to do anymore. Everything that could possibly go wrong in my life has to this point. In high school I never had a problem with friends or anything else. I was pretty popular and good at sports. It has done nothing but go down hill since then. I got arrested for a DUI last fall. That was extremely embarrassing and living in a town with 300 people in it only made it worse. I feel like I brought shame to my family. After that I dropped out of school because I kept failing classes. Now I have no money and no […]
i live with my parents (again) and i’m 28 years old, nearly 29. i work on computers for 40 hours a week. over the past year i have cleared up a lot of debt (largely in part because mom and dad have not charged me rent and put a dinner on the table for me). i’m coming up on a year at my current job; the end of May marks both my 1-year anniversary and my birthday.
about this time last year i was calling the police on some dumb ***** and her self-centered daughter when she threatened my life. i was such a wreck, racing […]
I hate this house. I hate Ottawa, I hate the whole damn province. I hate what this place has always stood for. Since I moved to this fucking urban wasteland all I’ve felt was angry, depressed and suicidal.
I hate what this house stands for too. In this house all that’s happened was me getting yelled at, me yelling back, me crying, and me being ignored. I hate the kitchen, this is where all the fights happen, this is where all the knives that I can never use are. I hate the living room, I spent an hour there yesterday being explained exactly how I’m nothing […]
I’ve been able to keep my thoughts secret for years now, without ANYONE knowing about the cutting or thoughts of suicide. But someone finally figured it out. And when someone finds out a secret that big they can’t keep it to themselves because if I were to finally kill myself, they’d only blame themselves. But they don’t realize that with every new person that finds out, it gets worse. The cutting has almost doubled and I just want to kill myself. People have been asling me to go talk to a counselor or a priest. I finally went to see a counselor and now they […]
I used to be one of those people who could summon infinite happiness from even the smallest things. Seriously, I’d walk down the street, and I’d find a nickel, and suddenly that was the best day of my life. What happened to that person? What happened to me? I know what happened. I just don’t know why it did. Why did it happen to me? That’s a question we all ask ourselves right: why me? I realize now that there’s just never an answer to why me always seems to be the butt of God’s cruelest jokes. So lately I’ve found myself asking a different question: what if? […]
I’m through, I tried to get better. Â I just want to stop the pain. Stayed in bed and cried for an hour this morning. Nothing makes it better.
I’m sorry to anyone who my actions are going to hurt, I really am.
To my kids:
I am so sorry, I love you so much but it’s not fair to you to be shuffled between parents like this. It’s not fair to have a dad who can’t function like a normal person. Both of you are the only reasons I’ve lasted this long. I hope you can forgive me in time and have good lives, I am so proud […]
I’m a fourteen year old girl and I’m just not happy with my life right now. I have been selfharming for little over a year now on and off and some days I just want to commit suicide. My parents are going through a rough patch and I doubt they’ll make it through. I feel like I fail at everything I do. I have amazing friends who try to help but they don’t really understand. They tell me how much they’d miss me but I know that in a few years no one will know who I am. That doesn’t really bother me but I […]
I am 19 and I’ve been cutting myself since I was 15. I cut on my legs so that no one will see them. I do it to distract myself from the sadness and emptiness and the constant thought of suicide. I feel like I’m not going to amount to anything, not going to do anything great with my life and be a complete failure. I’ve kept it a secret all this time. This is my first year in college and one of my new friends found out what I’ve been doing. She’s been tring to get me to stop but she doesn’t know what see’s doing. She […]
Hi everyone.
My name is Teresa, and I am a Depressed teen….
Oh GAWD.. did i really just say that. . . . ok let me start over… let me be real with you guys… and girls.
….
Hi, I’m Teresa. I am 17 years old. My birthday is April 4th. And I can promise you i won’t live past the age of 18.
I bet you all are curious why. I bet you all already know the reason. so does it really have to be said out loud? I think not.
lets continue.
My life sucks. I hate starting out so cliche. but this is one way to start that you […]
My greatest fear when thinking about taking my own life is the family I have with me and that care for me. I’m so lucky to have both my parents together still, and that would do anything for me. I also have a sister, brother in law, and two nieces whom all of I adore. I’m 24 years old and I feel like I’ve never experienced a normal life. I’m gay,and I also have other problems that make me self conscious of my appearance so I hate being in public or any places with many people, so I cant go to gay bars or any […]
The days when you just feel like giving up. I was determined to be happy today; my all time favorite person (my grandad) is coming for a visit soon and I was excited. But I dont think the universe is ready for me to be happy yet… No, shit HAS to go down and depress me again.
My best friend in the word, my only friend really, has decided to ruin my day. See, we’re in a group to do some little skit in French class… She cant do it. She is incapable of memorizing her 4 lines and refuses to try a simpler part. Its […]
YAY!! Again I was fooled by the empty promise which is…. actually scrap that, I won’t be dramatic about this, I will be plain and simple. And tell things just the way they happened. Just after that vicous attack on my mom, FINALLY! SAFETY! I thought, we were moving into the our new house on friday, without dad! WOOO! well that was until the other family started to get involved, moms parents didn’t give to hoots about what the hell she did, never did never will, UNTIL! she says shes moving to get SAFETY! SAFETY are you following? Then and only then do they decide […]
For years I’ve been afraid of fear. My main phobia is hands. How does an artist come to be so terrified of what she needs to use to create? And im not talking like an “ew, they’re creepy” fear, I mean full blown body shakes, nightmares, parinoia, the works.
and that’s only one of the endless list that i dont want to live.
There’s also heartache after constant heartbreak, the last one also the worst one, i just cant seem to recover from. Mainly because of the loss of my very first child.
There’s also having to choose between my parents, who divorced when […]
A long time ago there was a girl.
She was happy and care free.
Then she woke up.
The children got meaner,
Her parents’ “constructive criticisim” got harder and harder.
His hand got higher and higher.
The secrets grew deeper and deeper.
She began to lose her smile.
Her laugh
Her voice.
She walks now. A prisoner in her own mind.
She’s nothing but a shell.
So long now its been, she cant even remember what its like to be happy.
She did everything to feel anything.
She became what her father always knew she would.
She clung to the razor to remind herself she’s alive.
She drank so she wouldn’t remember the night.
She took the drugs to numb the pain […]
I’m not really wanted here at my home, my town, or my school. People even say it to me. Everyone seems to be strait up with me. Like “No one even likes you here, just leave already.” “If you take all of your medication and die no one would even care.” I mean like, I ignore them. But I can see why they don’t like me, I don’t even like me. Haha. I’m ugly, I’m too quiet, I never talk, I’m weird, I stare too much, I try to be smart in school (but get judged for it), my whole life revolves around my dead […]
yeah, so this is the first time im posting something on this site, 3 weeks ago, my friend Steve suicided in the cafeteria, everyone saw it, blood on the wall behind him, gun on the ground, I stayed in the cafeteria for 3 hours, then a teacher told me to go and relax. Im moving in 3 days, my parents are not together anymore, it feels really bad, plus my dad told me it was my fault, and my mom told me I was ”retarded”.. She told this to me because when I told her that I need help, the first thing she told to […]
Do I have a sign saying “shes vunerable, take advantage” on my back?
by lonelyinside
written by lonelyinside
This crap is getting really old. My new boyfriend, the one afore mentioned, turns out to be nothing that i was expecting under pressure.
The story starts on Thursday after school. Im texting him and his ‘best friend’ takes his phone and starts a convo with me like she knows me. Being the polite girl i am, i keep talking to her. She then tells me she has feelings for my bf and so my friend takes my phone and politely tells her(under me) that there needs to be boundaries cuz were dating. This girl starts trippin on me and i leave with my best […]
It’s incredible to think that I have to stop here. But the pain is overwhelming. I am afraid of being alone. Too afraid. I have no family. I was abandoned by my parents when I was 6 and I never saw them again. Right now I have a GF who abuses me psychologically, she is a drug addict who cheats on me and I cannot leave her because I am too scared of being alone. Loneliness is my handicap and I can’t take it anymore. I have no self respect to say NO and way too much resentment towards her to be able to solve […]