im only 16 i am no one to tell a 30 year old man how to live his life. i feel really bad for the things that have happen to u and u say u dont want to die but u dont wanna live. i dont want to sound rude and i guess i have never been in real life but i have felt the pain i am a really big bible girl now i believe that when u truly want to get better and pray god will meet ur hard work half way. if u go to a church and start getting a better […]
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ive been doing some thinking lately, which isnt really normal for me. im usually impulsive, which isnt good since its got me where im at today.
but i dont really think im suicidal, more like i just want to stop existing in this world. and the only way to escape it is to die. but i think i would still be the same way i am now, even if life had dealt me a different hand. i would always feel lonely, even if i was surrounded by people. i just feel like im different, everything im into or not into doesnt fit the fold. everything i […]
I think my brain is all but dead.  I just stare at a screen and my eyes see what they see – but nothing makes it to my brain.  I have no ability to focus and I have no motivation at all.  Half the time the phone rings I dont even try to answer.
life just blows.  ppl may be around me, but i am totally alone.  and i just wanna leave this world.  i need to leave this world
i think i must have already gone crazy. i am in a room full of ppl and all i can think about is stabbing myself or standing up and screaming at people.   And they have not really done anything to me – but i dont like people.  i feel judgement when there probably really isnt any.   I feel scorn.  I am never accepted in their groups.  i feel small and weak and like i simply do not belong on this shithole planet.
i am not exactly sure wtf anti-social means, but i am guessing i am it.   i wish they would just nuke the whole freakin […]
Growing up in mexico was hard :/ …I am 15 now I have a sister that is 14 && 2 brothers younger than me, one is 10 the other one is 4 ..Being the oldest is ALOT ! When I was 6 I had to start babysitting a new born ..My mom was never there ,My dad left us when I was 4,He was a dam drunk & I fucking hate him for those two reasons..I was sexually abused by my uncle when I was 4 but I still talk to him like nothing happened D; .. I never had a childhood …i was always […]
I have no where else to vent, this is my place and i no guys will alway listen even in the smallest amount. So my stress has reached a boiling point, my aunt had the gut to tell me i have a poor excuse for not visiting my grandfather ,because i have lessons, but when i fail school they alway say shit, i could care less for their fucking bullshit, i have my own life to live and i don’t want or need their fucking in put . Why doesn’t she spend time with him if she is so concerned. I really hate ppl […]
Im sure I sound like a million different ppl u all have heard but, SUICIDE IS NEVER THE WAY!!!!! PLEASE PLEASE READ MY STORY AND I HOPE IT CAN HELP AT LEAST ONE PERSON. I came home from the hospital about 3 hours ago and it starts like this…. I an 23 years old/female and have struggled with depression and anxiety from the age of 12. I was sexually abused as a child by multipule family members including my own father. i have always struggled with my identity and feeling that others didnt love me and i never loved myself very much either. I have […]
I played a few times….
No biggie….
 I was a stikler on even numbers, so I decided to break that OCD trait.
 That was my purpose of playing that russian game.
 It was not the cause.
Sometimes I wonder if there truly is a plan for my life….
Sometimes I wonder if it would be wrong to continuosly test this theory…
 sometimes…
(Ppl will read this as though it is a poem.. it is not. I centered the shit)(Ppl dont need to read my page, I’m no faker.) But if one needs inspiration… be my guest.. […]
Well, ive had tons of sex, and plan on getting more before i pass away, i have alot of ppl who love me, and some who are inlove with me, but thats not enough, ive tryed 3 time this past month but hanging yourself is not easy, soo… i need to find a new way, i have ideas so i gotta do more research, i dont want to leave pain to the ppl who really love me, but im selfish and i dont really give a shit, this is my life, and i will live and die how i want to, im not scared […]
I am going all out here, ive tryed 3 times to end my life, yet the method didnt work… err and a year ago i bought a gun, and go figure a week later somebody stole it, everytime i try to kill myself, somthing tryes to stop me..but sorry, god cant stop my suicide abymore, i am departing very soon, i have new methods, im just wainting on funds… i cant wait to die, i have my arrangements made already the only problem is where do i do it, my house,hotel,or what? In the mean time im on a sex co pade..lol all i […]
Call me Allen, and im 26, life is shit, I see all these stories about what ppl are going through and i say we all have a choice, I am planning my exit very soon, Im debating whether or not to hang myself (extention cord) or buy an exit bag, I really think the easyest way would be to hang, ive already tryed to see what it would be like, and Its gonna work, I cant Fuk up my suicide,I have to die, anyways, thoughts? Btw im gay and i am so over the whole love thing.. dont try to guilt me or change […]
MY LIFE IS WICKED ALL MY LIFE I’VE NEVER HAD NOBODY TO TALK TO I ALWAYS KEEPED MY STUFF TO ME. ”I ALWAYS SAID ME MY SELFÂ AND I” SO SOMETIMES I THINK ABOUT KILLING MY SELF WHY? BECAUSE AM SELFCONSIOUS AM ALWAYS THINKING AM UGLY I HATE MY BODY AM 21 YEARS OLD AM 5’FEET I WEIGHÂ 85 POUNDS I CANT GET OVER THE IDEA I WEIGH THE MUCH THE FACT THAT I C GIRLS MY AGE AND THEY LOOK LIKE WOMAN I LOOK LIKE A DAMMN 14 YEAR LD GIRL PPL DONT TAKE ME SERIOUS. I MEAN COME ON SOMETIMES THEY SAY TOÂ MEÂ ‘HONEY IS YOUR […]
Okay I said I wasn’t going to come back to this site but here I am. You ppl seem to be the only ones to understand. I’m in my early 30s and very alone. It sucks so bad but at the same time I push people away. I have these anxiety attacks and deal with depression so it embarresses me to be around anyone but at the same time I can’t handle being alone. I kno makes no sence at all. Its just like now… I lost 3 people just yesterday. Crazy weekend… had the police tracing my fone b.c. I was open to a […]
these days my mom is slowly trying to mold me into this over holy person, i feel like she is drowning me, an i am losing who i am slowly, while trying to please others ,an i feel like am at a constant battle trying to be me . So i just wanna say that life is hard but the obstacles we get through are what makes us who we are ,and dont let ppl change you cause in the end you will never realize who you anymore, and to all those ppl out there who are struggling stay strong, be true to yourself, dont […]
The anger boils within my blood, run through, my veins and pumps through my heart. I have reached my max i will not take anymore am not five and i will not be treated as such . I have done everything i was asked to do, i am obedient and kind ,but yet they keep me trapped here like a dog in a cage. I dont go out and lime with friends because they dont wish it i only try to a good child but not anymore i have my own life and i will fight for my rights as long as there is breath […]
hey guys.. its saturday night and im writing this! dandy! i just moved in to the states.. and yeah things are definitely different.. hard to adapt.. *puh* so i’m spending this saturday night in.. alone.. and.. listening to NYC by Interpol! wow! haha..
anyways.. I just wanna share my story.. i dunno what I’m getting out of this.. but.. it’s been tough I came off my meds.. a while back.. I popped some e’s over the last year that definitely did not help.. I just don’t feel things the way I used to.. makes it twice as hard to get a girl.. or anything really..
shy as […]
People say am over emotional, they say am easy read that am sensitive, of lately thats all i hear from people about me and i guess after years of hiding my sensitivity to obstacles in life ,am getting rusty ever since i opened my self to my bf.
This is not me am a fighter, i refuse to be run by my emotion, right now i have reached my max an am ready to yell an scream at ppl, am feed up have hidin hw i feel to be respectful etc i am fucking going to be me. So fuck pretenders, fuck close minded […]
My wife of 7 years left 3months ago and it still feels like the first day.she has a new bf wich she says shes in love with now.that
realy fucked me up.realy bad.the thought of them holding hands or kissing kills me and the thought of them makeing love makes me physicly ill i want to vomit.each day i pray all day to die and i even try about a month ago.thay put me in the hospital for about a week and i had to lie and tell them i wouldnt try again so thay would let me out.we have 4 year old son […]
Fuck everyone. Just…. I won’t sleep tonight I can’t cut I am ready to hang everyone in my family and burn them. I give up I give up I give up. No one here gives a shit and I don’t fucking care about you either. And to Everlasting, I’m guessing you’re really gone. Thanks for leaving me. Thanks for that favor! I’m gonna pass it on and lead hurt people to trust me and then just fuck with thir hearts! I can say I learned from the best-so many ppl who taught me that. See how many already suicidal hearts I can crush. Seems ppl […]
Hi everyone, it’s been a while since I’ve been on here. Not sure if ppl worried about me or not…
I lost a friend recently.. He was one of my bestfriends, and he helped me so much with my depression.. And now he’s no longer going to talk to me… Ugh I miss him….
It’s getting hard… My depression feels like I’m getting worse..I also think I need knew friends becuz the ones I have no don’t really treat me right.. I don’t want to get into details…
-RawrImaTurtle….