There’s a boy.I know you will probably skip this post because you don’t want to read the story of a broken hearted girl,but I will write it anyway because this is the book of my life and no one wants to read it.So I will write this story of love and blood here because this a story of a rock/goth/emo/satanic girl (or anyother names people use to call me) which secretly like a normal bo,you know,one of those cool guys that goes to parties and drink and probably think that my kind of girls must be burned alive or killed because they are freaks.What can […]
Tag:
Scars
“I can see the scars.” she said.
I realized now that there was no use to hide them, I was scheduled to leave by train in an hour anyways.
“what about them?” I replied.
She looked at me for a while. I could tell she was searching for something. Maybe some lost light behind the darkness. Some hope within me.
“Why?” she answered.
“Why what?” I replied.
“Why’d you do that to yourself? I’ve never gotten the point of cutting. What does it help?”
(Reply to her in the comments.)
(p.s. I will be doing these often and titling them ‘!!!’ I hope I get comments.)
I remember when I had none
No secrets.
There were no need for them.
I could trust anyone and everyone with anything.
I had no secrets.
I had no worries.
But one day something changed.
I became older, more mature
and suddenly everything was my fault.
Have you ever had a loved one pass?
Have you ever been bullied?
Has your mother ever gotten mad at you,
and said the words “Its just who you are”?
That’s all happened to me.
Now I’m worried.
Now I have secrets.
There’s no going back to the old me.
There’s no reversing what’s happened.
There’s nothing I can do,
besides […]
My mother is still physically and mentally abusive. And she never use to be abusive at all but i dont really know what happened. My mom has said hurtful things to me like telling me im a fuck-up and im worthless and also that nobody likes a little girl with scars. Not to metion the physical abuse so bad that i wish she would just kill me right then, but anyways i just cant bring myself to hate her and i still care about her dearly and i even drained my bank account to help pay for her surgery and prescriptions. Is there something wrong […]
what is wrong with me , this may sound stupid and worthless but im so sick of people walking all over me , what have i ever done wrong to get hurt so much in my life, im 15 years old and i think i might be devolping bi polar disorder, i always put an act on infront of others, when im around my family and friends i act happy and im the most cheerful person ever but when im by myself at night times i cry , sometimes even cry myself to sleeep. i have cut a couple times but not deep enough so […]
I’m 13 years old. I would tell you my name, but being new here, I don’t know if I can trust you all to that extent yet. Normally, I post poems that reflect how I feel at the moment, or how I felt throughout the day, but right now I’d like to get a few things off my chest. I’ve told a few of my friends some of this before, but no one knows all of it at its worst. I feel as though I can trust all of you with at least this, even if I don’t know you. So here it goes.
My story:
I got home from school to see that no one was home. Tears were streaming don my face as I made my way to my bedroom. I sat on the edge of the bed  in deep thought. Why do I have to be so ugly? Fat..worthless..stupid? I feel so alone-my friends..suggested we stop hanging out. I’m not a lesbian by the way. I may be a tad bisexual but so what? I’m not fully gay. And to anyone who IS gay, don’t be ashamed. My brain was clouded with thoughts. I screamed out in frustration and practically tore apart my room. Stuff was strewn out […]
It was only the first time.
I spun the blade around in my hands
contemplating if I should really do this or not.
I heard my mom yell.
Yes, I should, It’s worth it.
The blade sank into my arm,
cutting across my arm.
Not too deep.
It was only the second time.
The kids at school were bullies.
My parents just got mad.
I took the blade in my hands.
I didn’t even think about it.
I pushed it into my arm,
cutting across parallel to the last one,
A little deeper.
It was at least the 50th time.
I didn’t even have different reasons anymore.
You are probably sitting alone thinking why me? Why is this happening to me? What did i do to deserve this? Am i being punished? WHY ME? I am Jojo Ladd and i suffer from severe anxiety and depression. Im currently on medication which only seems to be making things worse. I try to tell myself ‘things will get better’ but they never do. But i dont give up because im here for a reason and i had a shitty childhood for a reason and i had to hit rock bottom for a reason. I may not be perfect and have problems and scars but […]
I finally got a job, which is wonderful. It’s helped me get out of the house, fill up my time, keep me busy and not feel so lonely. But the thing is… they are all so judgemental. It brings me down sometimes, I mean if they are talking about others like that, what are they saying about me?
First things first, I am a cutter, however I have always cut my legs, and the ones on my arms are done in such a way that they are either hidden or they just look like an accident. Anyway, there was a girl working for us for about […]
I snapped.
I confided in you my deepest secret.
I trusted you.
But, I was wrong to do so.
You twisted my words.
Made it sound worse than it really was.
Then, you told everyone.
Don’t you know?
I still have feelings.
I thought you were my friend.
I thought you were the only one who cared about me.
But, I was wrong.
You didn’t care.
Others did, but I turned my back, and now they don’t.
It was all you.
You spread the rumors.
You talked behind my back.
Don’t you know?
I still have feelings.
I showed you my scars.
I showed you what I […]
What road did i turn down that lead to this?
i wonder what had truly happened
the years that past, that left us behind
if i had the hands of time i would rewind
i cant change who you are
i cant erase all those scars
but did you have to mark me to?
the past of pasts it runs through and through
to break the cycle, break who you are
before your sense have ran to far
there worn out and stretched thin
so where do we truly begin?
they say to help, help yourself
you dont want it, u like the hand thats dealt
one mans pain is another mans pleasure
you hold it close like its […]
Hi,
My username is an anagram so if any of you care to do a little word play, you can figure out my real name, but thats not why I am here. I am here to tell you, the reader, a story. A story about me and why I want to die, yet cannot achieve presently.
I was born January 25, 1987. My mother was a drunk at the time and my father was smoking crank. I am the result of a one night stand. An accident turned paternal, if you will. My very first thought, I remember, was when I was still an infant, unable to […]
Hello.
I’m 13, And have a crazy family. I Have a bipolar raging mother who beats me occasinally, A dad who could give less of a fuck, a brother and sister both younger who always push my buttons even if i’m already crying, and a grandma who doesn’t help.  My mom is mainly the reason im here. I’ve been suicidal since i was 9. I’ve grown up mentally as well, i stay locked in my room almost everyday wondering what  to do and how to die. I have countless scars on my arms from cutting, thinking it was the only way to escape , and now […]
I have been bullied the best part of 11 years!!! i think that bully’s are disgusting and cowardly…. I’m constantly told to kill myself as I’m not worth anything and I’ve been hit, I get abusive texts and phone calls on a daily basis……. What’s the point? I have so many scars that I will never forget any of this my scars are emotional and physical…. I quit on trying to please everyone else when I can’t be myself…….x
first off, i just want to say that this may be provoking. sorry.
i have brunt myself, i have severly bruised myself, i have aerosol bruised myself. but i havent cut in over 3 months.
i used to be almost happy about my cuts. sometimes i would look in the mirror and smile at my pale thighs covered in red slashes , but other times i would stay up for hours at night crying into my pillow wishing they would dissapear. now im neither. the scars are starting to fade, but i know that i will have a constant reminder of my type of addiction
it feel like […]
my names shavon. im 15. i feel like one of those people from alcoholics anonymous. but really im suicide anonymous. i tried to commit suicide before. my arms are full of scars. my mom started physically and emotionally abusing me when i was 8. ever since then ive been looking for someone that could help me. nobody in my family helped me. i had a boyfriend named kody. and he used me and took my virginity. i tried to kill myself and he didnt even text me at all while i was in the hospital. i pushed my way through to recovery and got over […]
Oh lonely flower, where do your seeds go?
Oh lonely flower, may you forever grow.
Oh lonely star, how bright is your light?
Oh lonely star, blending in with the night.
Oh lonely boy, where have you hidden your scars?
Oh lonely boy, keep faith in your heart.
Oh lonely moon, why do they sleep when you rise?
Oh lonely moon, if only they saw the tears in your eyes.
Oh lonely world, where are the friends?
Oh lonely world, I must make this end.
I have lost the will to live it takes alot to make me smile and hardly anything to upset me. I have no energy anymore have lost intrest in my favirote things. I first started starveing myself around age 16 because i always felt fat, ugly and stupid comared to everyone eles. Ill go a couple days without eating then give in and consume a sick amount of food only to feel horrible afterwards. Food is an enemy i regret every meal i eat.
Self hatred has caused me to cut myself which turned into an everyday vice. Iv developed a blood lust waiting and […]
sitting here in tears over with life smiling like everything is okay but deep down i am having this cutting rage
i pull the razor out sit in the dark i dont wanna see the pain i just wanna feel the hurt.
recutting my scars crying i need help .
depression taking over suicidal thoughts on my mind
just waiting on the right time
to end this hell of a fucking life.
maybe if i die it would be easier to understand my story.