People will say “Don’t kill yourself please! You have so much to live for!” As I look around…I don’t have much to live for. In a world that’s feast or famine, war or waste, hate and debate. It never took me long to realize that suffering was life. You’d be lucky to find someone who chooses to stand with you as you struggle and suffer. This life is all about survival, we call it living to sound more appealing. I knew that if I had to go through this alone, I would not make it because my heart could not break it to my mind […]
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stand
I guess my problem has always been loneliness… been at school all day, then i did some sports and… still. I literally have like 2 hours of alone time and i cannot stand it. I feel like im losing my friends. My ex-girlfriend wants to get back together, told me her friend told her to break up with me. As much as I still like her, I cant do that. I was clean from porn for three months and now… one day. Shit is falling apart.
Yes… my life sucks. I don’t think that it sucks that much. Evertime I think I hate my life I think on those people who are worst than me. Like little kinds in Somalia and that shit… that’s the cultural instinct. But I don’t really care anymore. Who the fuck cares if there is someone in a situation worse than mine? That doesn’t make it less painful..
I don’t know, I don’t really care about it anymore. I don’t want to kill myself, that’s the thing… in my mind, there is still hope.. or at least, I crave for some hope… I’m desperate to think there […]
To say get better when you don’t have to.
To say there’s help when you don’t need it
To live when you don’t want to die
but
It’s hard to stay alive when you can’t stand to open your eyes to another day
You curse the day that you’re awake
You hope today is the day you’re brave
enough to take your life away
Suicide…why do people think I’m crazy?
They’d rather have me alive to watch me slowly die than to take myself out.
I’m looking to escape everyday
hope is finding the way out
I need to get out!!!
Why is it so […]
I’ve struggled with disdain and hatred for my body for the duration of my depression, I was diagnosed with body dysmorphic disorder last August and it all culminates at times. I just can’t stand my face, I’ve honestly tried cutting parts of it off with scissors multiple times but I’m a ***** and couldn’t stand the pain and blood. I have a particular hatred for my right eye, I have no idea why, I just hate it. It doesn’t look right, it’s ugly, it ruins my face, ugh, it’s just horrible. I’ve gone through bouts of wearing eyepatches for months at a time and my […]
Hello guys am 20 years old am here cause I don’t have anyone else to talk to been with my girlfriend for 4 years i I can honestly say she was the best thing that’s ever happened to me and we been broke up the last week it was the most hardest thing that I ever experienced I drunk ever day since it happened just so I can sleep at night plus I’ve only eating twice since it I actually don’t want a life without her yous might just think am goin thought a breakup am not I’ve experienced them before but nothing like this […]
That’s what he said to me this morning when he broke up with me. We had been talking/dating for a few weeks and it was damn near perfect. I still had my moment but of course he didn’t know that. We had such a good night a nice long walk in the park a good meal and he took me to see the movie of my choice. We rented a room and we just hung out for the most part, but of course we did the deed. I was so happy and he seemed the same way, but when I woke up this morning I […]
I can’t shake this feeling. I can’t stop crying and the tantrums keep getting worse. I recently started seeing a doctor, and all I do is cry but I feel relieved talking about my pathetic life to someone who can help me. Now I face something that frightens me, I’m only allowed 8 free sessions because I don’t have insurance. I feel like everyone leaves me, I’m afraid I’ll get comfortable only to lose my doctor. Everyone walks out of my life, I can’t stand people and yet I hate being alone. I don’t know what I want out of life, and I want to […]
Woke up today and sobbed into my pillow. My son came to see me. He made me feel somewhat better. He should not be the one to wipe away my tears. Not these tears. Not for this reason. I hate feeling this way every day. I cried out for relief. I finally made myself go out, again. I went out to see friends. It took me several hours. I am cheating everyone I interact with and myself when I feel this way. I feel better now, but what a waste. I can’t stand to live this way. I can picture myself completing this. I have wanted […]
I am too fucking old to go through losing my home and going down the ghetto life’s road with welfare, being homeless and all that shit. I’ve done this too many times. In the last week I’ve lost my job of over ten years, crashed my car and lost my medical insurance. Believe it or not the loss of medical coverage is the most devastating. COBRA costs almost $1000 a month to continue my coverage – not a viable option without a job. So now I sit, waiting for my medications to run out and decisions on unemployment insurance, O’ Blotto Care and the like. […]
Well after another failed attempt on my life I’ve ended up back on a mental heath ward 25 miles from my own town. I cart do this again I cart stand it I cart do anythink right I cart even kill myself right. I’m lucky to be allowed my phone as the last time I was in hospital I was not. I’m Laying here thinking of away out but I don’t think it possible here and I don’t know how long I would have to stay here for.
I just cart take another day off how I am feeling it’s over 7 years now off the […]
48 years old, virgin, never dated, tired of my life. I keep being told it’s up to me to change it, but since it never changes, clearly I don’t do anything to change it. Get depressed reading old posts of mine on internet from five, ten years ago, nothing changed in my life. I just don’t see the point in keeping on. Advice, go out more, exercise, join clubs, for what? I tried, nothing happened, okay got to keep trying, for what? More nothingness? I can’t stand myself, I don’t believe I can change my life for the […]
So I turn 18 tomorrow. And I promised myself that I wouldn’t turn 18 like this. I told myself that the fucked-up version of me would not live to see 18. Yet here I am, about to turn 18 the same depressed, lonely, self-destructive wreck that I’ve always been.
How could I have been so stupid to think that everything was going to change by just wishing? I would do anything to feel happiness. To feel love. To feel anything but this pain. But I feel like I physically can’t do anything about it.
I wish I had a gun. My life is such a mess that I can’t […]
as a female I am constantly the objective in anything that is sexual. when I try to take a stand for ourselves we are crazy, whores, ect… you can use your imagination. well my bf and I recently got into this argument, why is it ok for him to watch porn n not me? long story short it seems to me there are double standards anyone else who can explain this?
In everybody’s life there are ups and downs, but it seems like in my life there are ups and downs and downs and some more downs. And that goes for each and every day. I can’t stand it. This thing is driving me crazy. Correction – driving me to the edge of fucking putting a bullet through my freaking skull, because crazy I already am.
I’m on the verge of knocking myself out, hopefully with enough pills this time.
There is a part of me that do wants to live, to experience whatever may, but that part is very small. The other part, the dominent part, say […]
I don’t want to be reminded how undeniably identical we all are. The irony is that I want to be different, a never-before-seen version of the human mind. And this equates to one great big cliché, great. I’m a cliché.
As a child I was led to believe that my future would be full of wonder and adventure and discovery. But I was not born in a fairy tale, I was born into this life consisting of education, work, retirement and death.
I don’t want to simply blend into the blur of human existence. My goal is not to change the world nor is it to stand out from the crowd. What I […]
my family is the reason why i just wanna disappear from the world.
they aren’t nothing but stupid selfish ass people, who could care less about you!
they fuck everything up. i can’t stand to be around them. they ruined my life pretty much
How pathetic is that? I’m just in SO much pain, I can’t imagine how much longer I can survive to exist feeling this much excruciating pain. I just took a bunch of pills (to sleep) so here’s hoping they work. I cannot stand to endure this terrible level of pain much longer.
All my life, people have hated and humiliated me for no reason. I have social anxiety disorder. I look timid and weird, so people treat me like crap. I’ve had rocks and trash thrown at me for no reason. Strangers scream at and intimidate me for fun. I stay home most of the time. I’m always lonely, so sad, and so angry. I’ve never been on a date. I’m so sick of life. I feel like the devil is punishing me for no reason. I wish I could close my eyes and die, but every morning I unwillingly wake up to a brand new damn […]
Lately my thoughts are filled with my death…weather it be by my own hands, another or some freak accident.
ive always been suicidal, since a very young age and I’ve been in and out of ‘mental institutions’ since I was 13…I’m now 18. Nothing helps anymore…I feel like the weight of the world is holding my down. I try looking to things or people I love and know will be hurt by my death but even that’s not helping.
i can’t sleep anymore, I’m so scared of everything. I’m scared someone will break in and hurt my family. I’m scared of even the tiniest things.
Hell my dog […]