I started cutting a year ago in March when it happened. I was having a sleepover with my two friends Kiaya and Amanda. We all slept in my bed which was big enough to fit all of us. I was in the middle. I woke up in the middle of the night to whispers from Kiaya. She was talking from the perspective of a guy towards me in a seductive way. I didn’t do anything about it because I wasn’t sure what was happening. That’s when she leaned in and kissed me when my eyes were closed. She stole my first kiss, but that was […]
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I never knew about this website, but I’m glad that I came across it. The thoughts in my head have been getting worse and worse, but I keep trying to push through. Sometimes, it’s just easier to think “what would it be like if I were dead?” It all stared when I was just 11 years old. Here I am, 21 years old, and still fighting. When I was 11, life literally SUCKED. I attended a private school, and it’s true, the kids who go to school there are complete and total BITCHES. Just in 6th grade, I was bullied non stop. I was told […]
So close to cut myself again
But I still can’t do anything
There is just so much pain
I still want to do something
I’m scared of every day
my brain can’t stop thinking
I just want to stay
But I’m leaving
I need help
I’m too young to die
I really need help
And all I can do is cry
i really dont see meaning in nothing. i just want a courage to stop this hell that is to exist and to deal with problems that will never stop.
nothing keeps me wanting to live here.. oh god, how i hate my parents for being so egoistic and putting a life in a hell of world. i think that having children is the most egoistic act ever, you only put a life there and fuck it and if the life just not feel ok with that, ohh you’re a douche.. you have problems.. NO, you that put me here that have problem. not me. fuck you.
i […]
I just want help or maybe to stop living or run away from everything. I’m at university and I have friends but I’ve lied and cheated to everyone and haven’t lived up to my parents reputations or expectations. I want to be alone away from everything. I think about killing myself but more than anything I want my guilt and sadness to stop. I feel awful and horrible for the way I’ve acted but I can’t go back on my actions. Apologizing to people 4-6 months after the fact doesn’t solve anything. I feel horrible. I just want to be done with everything. I can’t […]
I have been back home to my country to attend my niece’s wedding, it was beautiful event, but it made realize how so alone I am and I have nobody to say all this to as my family doesn’t know that I am ill with my mental health and that I have been suicidal for last for months and that I had made 7 unsucessful atttempts at ending it all and was twice in psych hospital to stop me killing myself as on those two ocassions I would have not survived if they hadn’t stopped me.
In my visit to my country, my friend told me […]
Somedays I just feel like finally doing it. Just swallowing that bottle of pills on my nightstand or climbing onto my room and diving head first into my concrete driveway, maybe taking a kitchen knife a locking myself in my bedroom ..sliding it vertically down my wrist. My life is an endless circle of nothingness.
Wake up, get dressed, brush teeth, grab backpack, jog to bus stop, go to my seat, arrive at school, go to homeroom, go to 1st period, go to 2nd period, go to lunch, go to 3rd period, go to 4th period, get on bus, walk home, eat, do homework, get online, […]
As I sit here writing this all I can think about is the medication I want to overdose on. I’m a very easy person to talk to, I’ve been taken advantage of and at this point I’m really ready to be done. Life as I know it could quickly end. I’m 16 and have been to hell. My parents caught me my first attempt and thus putting me in therapy because they said I had lost it. Â How can I make it stop
A year ago I wanted to kill myself and I told myself I had to give it a year to see if that feeling remained. The time is up and it’s still what I want, I have a plan in place to make sure my cat is taken care of and that police/paramedics are who find the body. It’s a really good plan. But it is so frustrating to not be able to find any kind of solid information or resources on how to do get it done correctly. The things I found via Google seem so out of reach because they involve things I […]
I know exactly what’s going to happen between us tomorrow, yet I don’t have the willpower to stop it anymore. I’ve had it.
Just let me die now >:( I hate the way my brain works.
My favorite thing in the world is being there for someone like us. I am 17, a junior in HS, and I have 7 MS girls who are just like me. Cutters, suicidals. I can only help so much. Today, to get one to stop, I put my blade to my arm, on a line I have thinned out from my elbow to wrist, just in case I ever need to do it. It’s a pain to watch them worry, but a relief to watch them stop. I’ve gone back to cutting, though. What gives me the right to stop others when I can’t stop […]
Soeymeone else just posted this video:
What a coincidence…..I arrived home in PHX a few hours ago after spending a few hours on the GGB…I think I know pretty much all there is to know about what happens when you hit the water, so in watching this video I learned zilch. The majority of it was a guilt trip placed on people who choose to die this way. It was mostly about the “collateral” damage done to those who remain.
Frankly, I am sick of hearing this. If I ever decide to “go through with it” I will have no guilt about doing so (in advance, of […]
I cant stop crying… my life my relationships have all gone to shit. I havent felt this alone in a while… i feel trapped, used, unwanted and really hurt. I need to get out of here out of this situation out of these toxic relationships… birthdays in 3 days… happy birthday to me.
Hello I’m 25yrs young I like that word better I’ve felt this way for awhile now I attempted suicide once already and died for about 5 seconds, long enough to hear the heart monitor flatline and feel life slip away, when I was a kid I had believed in finding something to believe in or hold onto, when I was younger I would look into the mirror and this feeling of sadness ignite in my heart I’d stare through the tears and tell myself it’ll change it’ll go away I used to wake up at night and cry until I fell asleep again sometimes my […]
Hi,
This really has nothing to do with religion, but is a personal message by someone who happens to be a Buddhist.
The important part of this post is the advice of the writer, based on his own near-suicide attempt, and not Buddhism, which has little opinion on the matter, at least in terms of a coherent theology.
Honestly, I wish I would have found this 20 years ago, but it may help some people, and even the way things are for me now, it has made me stop and think a little more.
bz
have you guys a realized you have a fear of something or someone because of what they did to you….
well i do i have a fear of getting close to people because im scared they will leave me! it alway comes true and it scares me to death because…..im getting close to alot of people but the as soon as it starts to happen i stop myself because of my ex-gf and ex-bf i got close to them aND THEY BOTH LEFT ME AFTER WE BROKE UP AND BECAME FRIENDS THEY LEFT ME!IM DONE WITH REALTIONSHIPS FOR AWHILE!
I cannot understand a world that makes children feel like they need to end their own lives to stop the pain. I cannot understand how parents fail to take the time to give a shit about what their kids are going through, or worse, torment them, abuse them, and belittle them! I cannot understand people who put down others in an attempt to make themselves feel better. I cannot understand a fucking thing!
T if you are still here please check your email and call me. Please let me know you are safe.
Why do I bother? Why the FUCK do I even try anymore? After spending a few days in the psych ward, I would have thought that things would be a little better. You are just as goddamn selfish and self-absorbed as you ever were! What if I HAD killed myself, you *****? What would you have done then?
Would you go to your goddamn aerobics class instead of going to my funeral? “That’s how life is, and you just have to get over it. Stop letting every little thing bother you. You’re just like your daddy, I can’t talk to you!”
Maybe because all you ever want […]
So hi, I’m 13. I know that probably sounds young but whatever. Â I’m depressed, I self harm, and am bulimic. I’m attempted to kill myself many times- always getting interrupted my psycho parents who are abusive. I only have one real friend and he is my boyfriend. I love him so much but I feel like he likes other girls… he’s depressed and self harms also. he helps me live. he gives me the courage to keep going. without him I would be gone. I just feel like he likes other girls now… and when I was going to commit a while ago all he […]
First bid goodbye to those wielding knives
Then dim out from their shining lives
Next clear out all your promises
And shatter your own pulsing conscience
First fly away to a foreign land
Then distribute your every grand
Next write a will for things to come
And hope they’re not after that tiny sum
First stop paying your mobile phone
Then make sure you stay all alone
Next buy yourself a magnum gun
And float above the midnight sun