Just like my username says, there’s no hope for me. Nobody likes me not even my family, no friends, never had a relationship, afraid to go out in public, I’m a freak. Physically speaking I’m a freak. What’s the point of life if no one will ever love you because you’re a freak. They all condescend me at work, I can’ t go back to college cause I can’t handle the anxiety, there’s nothing there for me. I don’t know where to turn, I feel like I’m at the top floor of a burning building and the only two choices I have are jump now […]
ive been madly inlove with this boy for over a year now, we dated for 9 months, before i ruined everything. my parents were fighting so bad and it just seemed that since i thought they hated me, i thought everyone else did to, including my boyfriend at the time. it was summer, i would wear jumpers constantly. n one knew about my self harming, no one knew about the drug use. i hid it so well over a period of 9 months. my problems got […]
Tonight I plan on driving with no destination in sight. I have no idea where I will be going or what direction I will be driving. I can no longer live in this house. The pressure is to great. I hope that I will be reunited with the ones that love me and the ones that I love.
Some days i no longer want to try I no longer want to stress, some days I no longer want to move. I also know that I don’t want to leave this world early but the days that I don’t are few and far between. The thought of […]
It’s almost 2AM. I’m in my room alone. Crying my eyes out wanting to die. I haven’t felt this way in over a month. I look at my scars and notice them fading. Why are they leaving me I don’t want to see them go. They’re such a big part of me, I swear they’re my closest friends. I’ve tried everything to clear my mind, but nothing seems to work. I’ve tried snapping a a rubber band, I’ve tried drawing a butterfly,I’ve tried all I can think. I don’t know what wrong with my mind. all I know is that it’s back. The urge to […]
On the 4th of December this year I will eliminate myself. My Father also died that day (how fitting) never knew him though. I’ve given myself 6 months to prepare. Not to contemplate it but get my shit in order. Need to save some money, so that I can go to whatever location of my choice. Will possibly spent my last hours on this Earth somewhere near the ocean or the forest. Somewhere I’ll finally be at peace. Have thought about suicide for 6 years now. Failed 3 times. But I shall not this time. People think suicide is such an irrational and crazy thing […]
I dunno how to even begin this.. Im emmett, 16 and live in northern ireland. Im depreased every god damn day, i want to die, i have tried ending it 7times, i dont see my future at all, i dont see myself here in 2-3years time, i feel worthless, i am worthless, im only happy when am alone and crying, ive been bullied before but thats not the main issue why i wanna die, i wanna die to show myself that i can be happy, Â sad isnt it? Saying the only way someone will be happy is when their dead, i havent told my family, […]
This is it for me split from my missus after 18 years now living in a crummy bedsit on my own. I have no family and im 38 years old with nothing to look forward to. The thought of this being the rest ov my life!! Now found out my ex has cancer but wants nothing from me & wont even talk to me so i dont no whats going on. And iv never been so scared in my life. So theres only one solution for me and iv accepted it.
So i either:
1. Drink bottle whiskey and drop from my 7th floor balcony.
2. Drink bottle […]
Well, where to begin. I’m new to this whole thing. I figured, why not express how I to a bunch of people I don’t know? So, here goes it.
Im 16, no I’m not perfect, Â no I don’t have the worst lifestyle a human could have, but it could definitely be a hell of a lot better. I am now a sophomore in high school, and if anybody told you that high school was easy, they’re lying to you. Quit while you have the chance.
I have been bullied since the fourth grade. Crazy right? Who knew that girls could be so mean. I was always quiet, […]
Have you ever felt so much pain from all your hurtful past events that you break down crying? But then there just one event in particular that makes your skin crawl, even the thought of it makes you wanna fall apart right then and there…..You feel like you wanna break down and cry….But nothing comes out, so you sit there completely numb to the world around you, just being consumed by your own thoughts….Constantly asking yourself “Why?”…..Then everything just crashes down before your eyes…….and after a while……you just give in and wait for death…..Know the feeling?
~.Andi.~
today i sat on my bed with 205 pills lying in front of me. all a combination of my daily meds. i figured if i took them all i’d probably die. i thought about which would be the easiest to swallow first. i sat for about 30 minutes with my death centimeters away. there were so many thoughts going through my head but one that kept repeating was “you wont fucking do it.” I figured there was a slight chance i could make it but i knew i’d have to get my stomach pumped. so i went on google to see how long i’d be […]
I want to go home. I don’t understand anymore. My life is full of happiness and love, I have everything I could ever want, I like who I am. I am strong in my religion, I have lots of friends and lots of people that love me. Why am I considering suicide? I’m on medication and I go to therapy. Why am I still anxious and depressed? I’m so scared. I don’t remember how to be happy. The thought of killing myself scares me, why am I still tempted? I wish I knew how to fix this. Right now, it seems killing myself is the […]
Honestly, I am just tired. old, done the same job for 25 years, (Stay at home mother) Â lived in a strange city for the last 18 of them. Not one friend in this whole city. I hurt from age and loneliness. I was someone else when I got here but between him and the kids.. Who am I now? Trapped in the house by my own fears of the traffic. So fat I hurt, yet the pain keeps me from exercising.. Catch 22. I won’t die, I would love to, but how can I? How can I put my husband and kids though that? Yet […]
I just feel so done lately, done with everything and everyone.I get in my car to drive somewhere and I just want to take my hands off the wheel. The thought of growing up absolutely terrifies me. I feel so depressed, and I want to go to the doctor, really I do but she told my parents last time and I would literally quit if they found out. I’m just such a private person, I don’t like big groups or other people. I absolutely detest with a fiery passion being told what to do or being mocked for being “grumpy”. I’m overweight, so overweight and […]
Don’t wanna live cause I’m dead inside. Don’t wanna live cause I have a harsh life. Nothing but pain filled with panick attacks, nothing but falling into old traps. I am sick and tired of your little game. The game where you decide to show me pain. The place where I feel alone and I don’t even exist. The place where you…forget about it, never mind, don’t care for me, you got  too many other things on your mind. But your game is over cause I escaped, I suffered 18 years from this terrible pain, but now starts a new age cause I escaped and […]
so i had originally set up to post about “the date” a.k.a the day of my death. but my mind wandered off sexually and its a bit of a nuisance because then my mind got dredged up into old memories with people with whom would agree would have been better in the sense of different if there wasn’t any more human communication or even the thought of connecting
today was different. who would have thought itd end like this.
i got blamed for something at school now im expelled ( i had nothing to do with it ). go home to see that we were robed. and now sitting on top of a bridge at the moment guess il see what happenes at the end of the day.
Entry one:
Hello there…
This is the first time I am posting (or posting at all about anything before) about something like this but I think it is important to see if someone actually cares. Don’t try to remember my name or even ask for it, I don’t want you to do that and I hope that you could come to understand me than turn me away like the rest of them. I’ll try to write every briefly, so here it goes:
Suicide comes and goes from my mind everyday and I’ve really tried my best to figure out what’s wrong with me so I could fix it […]
The beginning  of January I became depressed at first i didn’t think i was i thought it was because i didn’t believe it, i went to talk to someone nd i got some medication and it worked for a month until i had lost control, my step dad was in a metal worker so he knows what to do but when i feel depress try everything i can to find ways to kill myself. I look at my siblings and want to be them. I wanted to die but now i want to get better
Any
thoughts
on zoloft?
Would you rather have a second chance in life like reincarnation after death or is the idea of there being nothing else after death more preferable? I personally am living a life of regrets so getting an opportunity to start again in another life is a comforting thought in some ways, like a clean slate. On the other hand however, there’s no way of knowing what circumstances you’ll be born into, it might be worse than the first life.