I feel hurt, angry, a little frightened. One of my best male friends moved in with me and a few other people back in the fall, and we’ve been close. Though, I’ve gotten noticeably more depressed. I didn’t figure out why until today. For our entire friendship, my friend has been trying to get romantically involved with me, regardless of whether I’m with someone or not. Because I’m too stupid and trusting, I had no idea. He’s aware of the fact that I’ve been in a few physically, mentally, and emotionally abusive relationships, and has apparently been using manipulative tactics on me. I didn’t realize […]
Tag:
trying
Why do people push love away before they can give love a chance?
Fear, Frustration, Anger and Heart Break changes that.
Have you ever been so excited and so alive with one person yet for no apparent reason they leave and everything changes? One day you guys are doing so much and are so happy that you can’t leave that person behind, because you think that there isn’t anyone as loving like them or enjoy each other’s company? You’ve done almost everything together and feels like nobody can ever replace them? Then one day, you both wake up. They leave you behind for other people. They lie; make excuses. […]
Admittedly, I don’t post prolifically, but I read the posts here every day. A lot of times, the selfishness of parents comes up (i.e. “they’re selfish, I didn’t ask to be here!”), and I totally agree with such sentiments. In fact, I’m here to post a true story that, I think, highlights such selfishness in an obviously negative way. I should mention that I’m actually not the subject of this story; rather, it is comprised of bits and pieces of blog posts by somebody named Anne McCarthy, about her son James (presumably James McCarthy). It is deliberately told in a somewhat […]
I’ve tried it as a method of suicide. I couldn’t get past a liter without feeling like I was drowning myself in a tasteless liquid. I’m tired of trying all of these methods and getting no where! Its not that I’m half assing my attempt’s because plenty of people die doing a lot less, I’m simply unlucky. I need to find a way to get luck on my side soon, before I’m torn from the only thing that I have left.. my apartment.
Hello, this is Justin. I have been reading something’s here and there. I haven’t posted cause I don’t know what to say or how to say it. I found a couple different comments from people asking about me and looking for an update. Well I am alive. What happened was I didn’t go through with it. I called the police myself and they came over. The fire department took me to the hospital. I was there for a couple weeks. I have been out just over a month. I am trying. And that’s about it. I don’t want to get too deep into it all, […]
If I accept myself and my life- will that stop me from not trying to solve my Major Problem that’s causing me a great deal of shame and sense of worthlessness?
If I don’t, won’t that just make me forever miserable?
When my efforts fail and fail and nothing gets better, of course I want to end it all.
Then something may snap me out of that mood, but it is only temporary.
Because my efforts will still fail and fail and for as long as they fail will I have no hope and for as long as there is now hope will I want to leave…
Yet if I […]
TLDR: 20+ years old, moved abroad to meet online friends, did something silly and now debating whether or not to leave cause I’m happy as fuck here but if I go home (and make the people here happy) I’ll spiral back down.
Hi everyone, first post. I’ve read this forum for months while trying to constantly claw myself back up from rock bottom, and I thought I did (temporarily) until I came into this problem.
I’m in my early 20s and moved across the world to be a nanny. I was studying at home, working, and just felt like a drone. I had met a few friends […]
I’ve been done for years now I just keep holding on in hopes of a better future but I can’t keep holding on to hope then watching it shatter in front of me I love to much so I break to easily even my Mom doesn’t care I’ve been trying to stop feeling this way to stop feeling that’s all I want I tried to kill myself Thursday but as I’m typing this you see I failed and now I have decided it’s the end I don’t how I’m going to but I have to
I am an inspiration to many both here and in my life outside. I am a preachers son, and expected to act like what I am not. I am looked upon with judging eyes everyday. I am an inspiration to the church, showing teens aren’t all the world says they are. I am an inspiration to my friends by always trying to make them happy before me. They see me as a person who will do anything to help them. I am an inspiration to my family. I have 6 siblings. One is a drama girl, the next an attitude awkward child, and the rest […]
Are any of you depressed people experiencing not only depression, sorrow, and boredom of life but also HORROR? Is anyone experiencing trauma and panic from existing in a cruel and violent world? Afraid to wake up in the morning, afraid to exist, afraid of gods and devils? Do you feel like you are living in a horror movie? Fear of someone torturing you? For me life feels like the movie Saw with God being Jigsaw. I am trapped in a very evil body and if I want to get out, I have to literally cut myself out or do some other gruesome thing in which […]
so within the past year I have consumed more than a big bottle of different kinds of pills (trying to overdose) obviously. but I have never been successful. what am I doing wrong? why am I still alive. I see this also as a blessing but because I’m so sad I just don’t understand why I’m still here someone please help and tell me what I’m doing wrong
im tired of trying to please everyone but myself. im tired of pleasing my parents(grandparents). tired of trying to please my so called friends. tired of trying on everything. im just tired of getting up to go to the same shit everyday. getting yelled at cause im failing my classes well for your fucking information im taking pre ap which is better then regular classes and its changed since your fucking time. getting picked on made fun of being a expierment for my friends just so they can have fun cause i wont stand up for myself well guess what keep doing it but when […]
I thought I was feeling bad enough before. But apparently not. I still am trying to make things better in my life before “the date”. I don’t know if I’m gonna be able to do it. I wasn’t expecting so much drama and heart breaks. I am so alone right now. Everyone is tired of me and my depression. Everyone is so busy. I have nothing to look foward to. I have nobody to love. I have no passion left. I feel empty. I get this impression that I’m trying my hardest to feel better, but it’s never enough. Maybe I’m just not meant to […]
I am 15, I live in a house with my mum, my brother and my mothers partner, recently my mother had a baby, but that doesn’t sound so bad, however, earlier in life I was diagnosed with aspergers, and everything went to hell, this was before my mother met her partner, but anyway, after that I knew that I wouldn’t be able to have what every other teenager could have, and my mother seemed to know that too and is personally trying to ruin my life, ever since she heard that I was diagnosed she started treating me like a baby, I had less privileges […]
I’m trying my hardest every day to be happy and some days my mind over powers all and i end up being mean to the people i love. I’m still struggling with my weight but i’m working on it. Thank you to anyone who responded to my last post, I’m thankful that there is someone out they that will listen to people like me.
Hi everyone!
Nothing personal today, but I’ve been having strange dreams for years, even before I was on sedatives or antidepressants, and sometimes these things make them more vivid, but they’re always strange. I can’t remember them most of the time, but I remember flashes of things, like dizzying heights, zombies, the end of the world (actually pretty common for me), people getting mutilated, trying to solve a mystery or stop a crime.
Anyway, I wondered if anyone had any dreams or nightmares they would like to share. I’m wishing I could remember what I dreamed last night, but apart from a few snapshots, it’s gone.
this is my first post here I dont even know why im trying its stupid all I want is to die ive tried overdosing and cutting but I just ended up in hospital and since ive been on these new pills all ive done is make things worse I ruined 3 friendships and my relationship I messed up
why am I here…I JUST WANT TO DIE and end this hell thay is my messed up life
I think I’m asexual and it’s ruining my relationship(s)! Can anyone relate?
by kahlia
written by kahlia
It’s really bringing me down. One time after the other, I’m rejected and my world is torn apart because of my sexuality. Some days, some times, it seems appealing. So it happens, and then poof, I feel like I could never have sex again. I’m bored by it, it makes me sad to follow through sometimes when I’m trying to make him happy, but I don’t know what to do about me because I don’t know who I am anymore…
I’m lost. Going crazy. And I feel so alone every day.
Sorting out my thoughts I guess, really hard to know what is what  anymore, am I just thinking this way cuz im angry or depressed or  is this what I really think. I question every thought i have anymore, I don’t trust myself to make many decisions anymore. Insomnia is kicking my ass . 2-3 hours sleep a day is really getting to me. Soon i will crash an sleep hours an hours. Obessessive thoughts and tourrettes syndrome is starting to get really bad to.
I have nightmares about my boyfriend , in them im trying to escape and hide from him. .. Guess cuz of all the […]
I’m heading down a destructive path I don’t care anymore Im jut kinda done with it. I’m ignoring how I feel it builds up and I freak out have breakdowns and panic attacks. I’m not functioning right. Im to busy helping others trying to make ten happy and worrying about them that I don’t even help myself or even try to. I don’t know what to do I don’t think I want to get help anymore I’m just kinda here.