I never really had a good life. My brother and mom never listened when I needed them, and my dad left when I was three. Middle school was where it got really hard. Over and over kids would come up to me to spout some insult just for the kick of it. No one ever even asked if I was okay. I had to change my personality over and over to try and fit in, now I don’t even know who I am. High school was the turning point from bad to the worst. My dad tried coming back because I won some academic award, […]
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wanted
I can’t cope with the humiliation, degradation & isolation one more day.
I can’t handle the pain, physical & emotional, anymore.
I’ve tried to continue.
But this life is too humiliating to bear.
How wonderful!
About a couple months ago, my dad tried to kill my mom. I stopped him, then he tried to kill himself by drinking the acid he wanted to throw in her face…
To make things even better, ever since my dad returned home from the hospital (a month and a week ago), there’s been constant fighting between my parents.
And for some reason, I ”need” to get counselling for this ”traumatic” event… As if this was the first time my parents try to murder each-other, or to my dad tries to kill himself…
Oh well, life is good, ain’t it? Fuckin’ tired of this shit…
it’s funny how i’m just a natural listener and talker. so many people are just one or the other, but i need to listen to other people so they can get their feelings and problems out and also talk about my own problems and just about dumb shit that is important to me. i wish i could just pick a side, but i can’t. i listened as my roommate talked to me about her concerns about her academics and her friends back home which I thought was nice. i tried to be as responsive as possible so that it would seem more like a conversation, […]
it was a set up. i knew it was a set up and went anyway. i was hungry. people do wierd things when they are hungry. i only went for the food. food wasnt good, and the price was worse. i do not need or want their relegion. and i am a way better cook. how dare they tell me that what i think and feel is wrong. what i believe is a lie,their is only one way. what bullshit. i was hungry. only wanted to eat. no one to blame but me.i knew better. should have stuck with macdonalds
Why I have to face myself everyday with depression and anxiety I don’t know, I just wanted to be liked and loved but sadly I never was and it doesn’t help when family members and pets had to die on me, I’m lost and alone an I’ve been contemplating suicide for a long time, I tried once before but my mum came in my room as I was fading out and stopped me before I died, I just don’t know what to do I have a life like everyone else but no one to Love at the same time and no one to love me […]
Here is my life story. My mother left me by 2 years old I don’t know why I always assumed its because she never wanted me. All my other siblings live with her in Arizona. I grew up with my father. He was abusive of course but that’s what how I know people care about me when I can do things for them or they hit me. My dad died of cancer when I was 16 a sophomore in high school I didn’t have many friends and the ones I did have were never nice to me but I hung out with them anyways. When […]
I hate the feeling of not knowing how to do something or not getting things right away, it makes me feel obviously dumb as hell and incompetent. Final exams are coming up and being “stressed” is a damn understatement.. Maintaining my grades and not disappointing my parents.. I usually only write about how fast my emotions change but I’ve been feeling quite stagnant. Its weird to not have ‘episodes’ but hell its a fucking relief. Sorry this isn’t too cohesive I just wanted to write something here. And is anyone good at chemistry and is willing to help me? The teacher is 70 something damn years old […]
I’ve never been on this site before ever. I’m killing myself tonight but I just wanted to talk to some people before I do. Idk. I haven’t really talked to my friends lately. Just something to keep my mind off of it for a few hours I guess. Thanks homies
I remember the day I found out I could actively take my life. It was the first time I realized I could die. It was freshman year. Two kids died that year. I knew them both fairly well. I guess that’s when it all really started. I knew I wasn’t like everyone else, but it seemed okay. I thought I would grow out of it. I didn’t.
I remember the day my life changed forever. I found my birthfather, or rather he found me. I made the mistake of meeting him. I remember shortly after my adopted dad found out he had a daughter much older […]
I always wanted to kill myself ever since my dad got lung cancer and passed when I was 10. But the thoughts of suicide got worse when I started to get bullied in school at 11. Every year it got worse and worse. I started to cut myself and snap rubber bands on my wrist till they bled. I never felt good enough for anybody. I always felt out of place. I’m twenty now and working. But I began to get bullied there too for being skinny. Its not just the bullying that bothers me, its being single and lonely. I’ve been used […]
I feel guilty hating my life like I do. I’m what most people would consider successful, but what I consider a complete and utter failure.
All I’ve ever wanted to be is a wife and mother, yet at almost 35, I’ve never even had a boyfriend. I’ve failed at what’s supposed to be the most natural thing of all, love. I have no one to talk to about this, because no one would understand. I think about killing myself most hours of the day, and no one I know would believe me if I told them that. I’ve become very good at faking my life, so […]
To whom it may concern:
I just wanted you all to know (you know who you are), that i appreciate the time and energy, as well as the privilege of an audience, and debate… the interactions… those of you who have, have shared with me.
You all helped me in ways i cannot sufficiently verbalize, even in the harsh times. I spent a lot of time here, shared many thoughts, ideas and feelings, with many people. You guys were like my e-family. You guys were there to challenge me, or to comfort me, or to just occupy my focus… when i needed anyone, and had no one […]
Let me tell you a True story.A story of a Childs dreams and how he ended up being the very thing he hates.Dont worry about his name.
Many years ago there was once a child,a boy.The boy was a very happy,and cheerful,and hyper.He loved going to his cousins house to play,he loved going outside,and he loved to be around other people.This child started off just like any other…pure.He had dreams of being a soldier,of being a firefighter,and of being a Hero.more than anything the boy wanted to be someone who helped others.He wanted to help the poor be happy,he wanted to give those who had nothing,everything.Unfortunately […]
I just wanted to ask the user “hmm” if they are still on this site.
I messed up this summer. I fucked up my relationship with my best friend who I’ve secretly had feelings for for the past 5 or so years. Since grade school we were friends and in high school when I started to get really depressed she was the only person I could talk whom I felt didn’t judge me for it. She helped me a lot in some low points in my life when I was thinking about suicide. She’d always ask me how I was feeling and she’d listen to me rant about life without judgement. She lived kind of far away so I would […]
I keep getting these constant fears that im going to end up all alone and it seems like it might be true.in 10 years will my parents even be alive and were will I be if there not here to take care of me.im going completely insane cause Ive never worked.i don’t do college . I’ve never been in a relationship nor is anyone even remotely interested in me.no kids.im disabled I want to die but am a coward who cant find the strength to jump off a bridge and the only other thing ive ever tried is overdose . everyone says im doing well […]
So I just printed my suicide note and hung the pages on my wall and then took some markers/highlighters to it to basically spice it up and draw some additional attention to all of the people I hate, and honestly, it actually made me feel better….
Just in case anyone else wanted to try the technique for a temporary band-aid on a gushing wound.
I have many times considered going mute or at least try to avoid talking all together. It seems that not really anyone wants me or wishes to just accept me. I try acting hyper and energetic at time to gain that attention but I still feel that people would rather forget me. I though try to act quiet and wise but it doesnt counter the random fool people mistake me for. I can’t blame them, and I feel that I’m never able to get out of what I am. I feel left out. My goal is to become remembered long after I’ve died but I […]
This will be my third story on here. And probably my last. I’m done. I typed up my note on my computer and I have my pills with some water. I am going to do it tonight or tomorrow night. I’m sorry if you tried to help me. It’s almost funny. I walk down my hallway and see pictures of me when I was younger. You wouldn’t even imagine I would become this. This monster that cuts himself and cries everyday just because he is different. Someone who can only find closure in death. I really wish it didn’t have to be this way. I just can’t see a […]