I’ve come here to this site, as I do to many sites about suicide, because I am what has been coined a suicide survivor. My grandfather killed himself with a gunshot to the head four years ago this October. Although not close to the family due to extremely traumatic events caused by this same family during childhood, I was devastated by his suicide. He was one of the few people in the family I cared for. I was the person delegated to clean out his room with his blood and brains still everywhere. My father had not done anything to […]
Hi everyone. I am new so I will introduce myself but I’ll try to make it short. I’m a 23 year old woman who was diagnosed with depression and bi-polar at age 13 . It has been an ongoing struggle for me ever since. I frequently self-harm and have attempted suicide three times in the past. I also suffer from bouts of binge-eating and anorexia. Through the years it seems that when great things happen to me, they always end in disaster and I end up in a worse spot than i had been before that good thing happened to me. And each time it […]
I wish. . .
Maybe it doesn’t…
Maybe I don’t…
I wish though…
I hoped…
I thought…
Please wish me luck
i was caught cheating in school (actually the teacher saw the writings on my hand after the test) and never have i gotten into so much trouble. I told my parents in advance about the thing and they were so disappointed. i know all of these is my fault and my reasons will never be valid.
i just wish the guilt will go away. i have been back to feeling depressed again because its been hell for me lately. its the end of the school year and they’re just dumping schoolwork on us like there’s no tomorrow. then i got caught cheating and i feel worse. […]
The Anger came back. It feels like poison. It takes everything out of me and to compensate, I take it out on everyone and everything around me. I wish I didn’t I feel sorry after I do. But it just doesn’t seem to go away. It’s a punishment. I can’t sleep at night. I drink so I won’t dream. I have such an overwhelming guilt. I wish I could go back… Not to change the outcome. I don’t think anyone can cheat death. When it’s your turn. It’s your turn. I just wish I could have gone back. Not left her alone. I wish anyone, […]
i don’t know why i keep feeling like this, but i just wish i could die. i just wish i never had to live another day.
im sick. and tired. of walking around in this repetitive, meaningless world.
and i just don’t know how much longer i can do this.
if someone wants to talk, you can skype me.
I’ve met somebody online..
This person is making me feel better than anyone ever did before. This person has an endless capacity to love people. This person is stronger than anyone I met before. This person is positive and happy right now. Maybe ’cause she knows her time will come soon ? I don’t know that, but it’s surprising how a terminally ill person can make me wanna live.
I wish she could stay alive. But maybe she wouldn’t be the same person, and I need to enjoy her “presence” while she’s still there.
I’m sorry if I mislead you, lead you on or gave any signals I didn’t mean to send. Truth is, I’m in love with someone who sure as hell isn’t you. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you before… I’m a lesbo freak. I’m in love and it kills me everyday because I know I can never have her. I feel z lot of shit, pity for myself and empathy for you. I’m sorry I can’t ever love you, and I know what it’s like now, to have love thrown back in your face. I’m sorry I can’t be who I wish I could be… if […]
I really don’t understand myself. One moment I’m full of joy, the next I feel like I want to die. I am so tired of feeling this way and I can’t tell anyone about this because they will always say I’m being overly dramatic. I wish there was a way to fix myself. Why am I even posting here? Why do I always have to feel sad?
I really wish that I didn’t have mental health it trulry sucks! You don’t know how ur going to feel from one day to the next especially with bpd. Why can’t I just be free from all this pain.
its not about waiting for ðthe sorm to pass its about learning  tood dance in the rain 🙂
Lately things have been going good , and yet I still find myself , waiting…
for something bad to happen to remind me that this happiness that has been given to me to  borrow.. To remind me that life has been playing a joke on me and I’m just waiting for the punch line , ..  Why can’t life be easier ?
I suffered so much already I’ve endured what a person could only believe to be nightmares. I’ve only tried to make myself believe that things are okay and they will be different … Â I don’t have to live by my past and let it define […]
I’m going to be straight to the point here. I wish I can kill myself. I wish I was brave enough to do it. I am not doing a good job at living. There is always something wrong with me no matter how I change for the better. I want people to help me but I am tired to ask for help because I’m being overly dramatic. There are times when I am happy and I always count those days. But when I’m not it is always there, the thought of ending life right then. I really wish I can. I know I am selfish […]
I feel like my life is just a series of bad days strung up together in one endless cycle, I can’t seem to escape.
It is like you wake up with a hang over to realize you’re late. You stub your toe on the way to the bathroom, and you realize there is no hot water for a shower. You get stuck in traffic, then there is no place to park and your boss gives you hell that day. You’re doing a mind numbing, meaningless job to pay the bills for the things you don’t really need. No body gets you at work, you wonder […]
i feel like I’m walking into a sacred temple of sorts and I’m defiling the marble staircases just by stepping onto them. If I walk past the oak doors and into the cathedral, the stained glass windows will shatter and the pillars will crack and crumble at my undeserved and unwanted entry; i have no place here, I’m barely lost. I am a wandering destruction.
I wrote something a few days ago, and i’m sharing it here, now.
“To the Readers”
Slip.
You slip and nothing is as it should be; the world around you is but an endless dream, a mere coffee stain on your notebook […]
I don’t think I can do it anymore.
I’m tired. I’m so tired. Of fighting myself, of struggling, of not sleeping, of my thoughts, of the loudness, of the pain, of the medication.
I just wish that my brain would be quiet. It’s too loud. Everything hurts.
please
make it stop
i always wonder if people look at me and think.. damn i wish i looked like her!! or do they think damn shes ugly ass fuck. im a kinda thick girl and active tall long blond hair. and you would think ppl would like that but i guess not..
pretending to be normal is so exhausting. not to mention that I can’t sleep, and haven’t for three days. wish I could sleep. Things might be a little better if I could.