Vulnerability

Hello,

Thanks for taking the time to read this post. I have been thinking about shame and guilt. What I’ve noticed so far that I have done some terrible things in my life as a result of shame. I have intense suicidal thoughts due to shame. Shame, meaning I am a bad person and guilt meaning I have bad behaviors.

At times, I think people use shame and guilt interchangeably, which is detrimental to someone who struggles with mental illness. I have a lot of shame. I am shameful of my ethnic background, I am shameful of my behaviors and people I’ve hurt. There’s several things wrong with what I just said; I know that intellectually, but practicing self-love and vulnerability is a different story.

Being vulnerable, in my opinion, means acknowledging the difference between shame and guilt. Beginning to take the first step toward self compassion, deciding that in spite of everything that is happened I will not rely upon self-esteem primarily, which can be subject to the ups and downs of life, I will have self compassion for the things I’ve gone through and appreciate my ability to be resilient.

I welcome anyone to add to this, any advice would be greatly appreciated. As I mentioned, I’m just scratching the surface on the stop process.