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5

Health issues are on another level

June 18th, 2018by Specter

I thought that I’d already been in hell since late 2011. Extreme isolation, becoming mostly a shut-in, losing the last few contacts I had one at a time. Not working, not in school. Giving up on myself and gaining weight. Hardly getting any sunlight. But it became the new normal, entertain myself as best I could, listen to podcasts and watch streams to try to emulate some form of human interaction, and just deal with it.

In April I ended up in the ER. Thought I had an infection or something. I was having trouble in the bathroom. I’m 31 years old. My bladder hasn’t worked …

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23 hours ago • Chronic Pain, General, My Suicide Note, Rants

7

Sinking

June 18th, 2018by ratlovinggirl

Im beyond done I want to scream until my lungs burst and punch a wall until my fists break. Its Fathers day (fuck that anyway) and my stepdad left me alone to watch the kids despite me not having slept in days. He wouldnt let me call my grandparents for help either. My rat died, we have to put my dog down soon, and my therapist won’t answer my calls. I’m sleep deprived, depressed, constantly crying, and ready to just give up. I have such a constant level of stress i literally feel like theres something pushing my chest to stop me from breathing. I …

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24 hours ago • General

1

Broken Ears = Broken Mind

June 17th, 2018by Failure143

When you said that you cared/ I knew you lied/ When I hide in the night/ I have to fight/ I have to fight to not cry/ Have to fight to not fly/ Through my roof and say goodbye.

No matter what I tell you/ My words just seem to go through/ I try to share my pain/ I try because I alway fien/ I fien my own smile/ It’s been fake for a while/ but your broken ears/ Do not see the tears/ The tears in my voice/ Instead you rejoice/ Thinking I’m happy/ But broken ears break my mind you see.

I look at my …

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1 day ago • General

0

Yes.

June 17th, 2018by AgentQ

http://web.archive.org/web/20121124070648/http://suicideproject.org/2012/10/of-depression-and-associated-philosophies-an-exhaustive-exposition/

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1 day ago • General

2

June 17th, 2018by OFFTheShadows

I believe in nothing…

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1 day ago • General

2

things to say, but this sums it up.

June 17th, 2018by freeroma

 

and I lost never have I ever.

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1 day ago • General

7

Done. Fucking done

June 17th, 2018by NumbExhaustion

So I want to die. Like honestly. I’m so done with everything. Mom’s banning me from watching Criminal Minds (Because it’s “corrupting my mind”) and my parents took all the locks off my doors and I really just want to cut. I’m tired of living here and I’m already sick of summer break. Goddddd. Just frustrated.

I can’t figure out my gender either. Like I thought I was agender but then what if I’m FTM trans? I dunno. I’m just realizing this now too. It’s not something I ever knew from a young age. Is that even possible? Also, can you be FTM trans without bottom …

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1 day ago • Family & Friends Effects, General, Rants

4

Existence is PAIN

June 17th, 2018by khajiit

Pain? You don’t know what Pain is until you’re playing halo 3 elbow deep in some alien ass teaching them a true less in cause and effect. You crush them and mutilate them and you’re about to put the final can of specialized whipped cream whoop ass on the alien scum- when out of nowhere your mom shouts down at you “I told you to clean your room! If you don’t clean it this instant I will shut off the power!”.

Your eyes glaze over, you lose the match, your vision goes red. You find yourself standing over your mom’s mutilated body.

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1 day ago • General

11

my mom has just checked my virginity

June 17th, 2018by 5ara

my mum has just made the thing that is the most powerfull triggor for suicide
she did that so that she can be comfrotable
she did that because she wont let me marry sb if i am not virgin so that she can be fine and nobody would say anything about her
what a good mum ……….

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1 day ago • General

2

dad

June 17th, 2018by tearsgirl

my dad is dying and i’m sad and happy for that. he always was a asshole with me and my mom and finally i’ll let me in peace but i love him. it’s so sad that he wasn’t a good dad. i wish he wasn’t a chemical dependent and a alcoholic of shit but i cannot change that. he even didn’t apologize for turned my life in a fucking hell. he manipulated me and he assaulted my mom. he deserve all the pain that he’s getting now but it’s not fair with me to see him dies.

xx tearsgirl

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1 day ago • Family & Friends Effects

0

disappointed

June 17th, 2018by tearsgirl

i’m so disappointed with everyone. my best friend, my mom, my grandma, my dad and myself. literally everyone. people are asshole and this sucks. i’m so fucking tired. i visited my psychology yesterday and it was horrible. i just can’t take this anymore. i failed with myself. it’s clear that i cannot handle the weight of life. i just wanna disappear.

 

tearsgirl.

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1 day ago • Family & Friends Effects

2

In The Dark of the Nite

June 17th, 2018by Wednesday

Ambivalence.

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1 day ago • General

3

a little bit of everything

June 17th, 2018by justhope

i had a fight with my mom today. i think we fought because i wanted new shorts and she said 20 bucks is too much for shorts, but then she talked to some friends about buying gin and she was like: oh, 45 bucks for a bottle of gin is really little…

so we fought in the car on our way back home, and my arguments were like really shitty and had no connections to the actual situation, but actually, i was trying to tell her that i want to spend some time with her and that my thoughts aren’t that great and positive… i was …

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1 day ago • General

3

Why we choose suicide.

Why we choose suicide.

June 17th, 2018by WickedApparition

I have little doubt that this video has been posted here before; however, I’m pretty sure that it is impossible to overshare a video of this caliber, so since I found myself watching it for the hundredth time (not really, lol, but I have seen it a lot over the years) I thought I’d share it.

If you’ve yet to see this then I hope y’all find meaning and enjoy it as much as I did/do

 

 

Remain Blessed,

-Kev.

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1 day ago • General, Stories of Hope, Suicidal Survivors

14

Judgement

June 17th, 2018by Ree1222

I am laying here with the poison, I am scared too but I know that I will never get enjoyment out of another day. My head’s function for emotion has decreased. I am debating taking the DNP as I type, by the time I hit the publish tab, my drink will be mixed and drunk. I have drunk some but I may need to mox some more.

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1 day ago • General

6

Father’s Day

June 17th, 2018by SweetQuietus

No meaningful way to honor your memory comes to mind.

Visiting your grave holds no spiritual or emotional import. It’s just grass and brass covering carbon and mineral.

Your favorite food. Your painting. A joke. Identifying a bird or flower or plant you taught me.

Everyone’s moved on. Mom’s “in love”.

You were what held our family together.

You are missed more than words can convey. Sometimes I can still hear your voice and your laughter, but your words are fading. I never imagined that we’d lose your stories.

Dad, you were the very best part of us.

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1 day ago • General

3

Strange days,when you’re a stranger…

June 17th, 2018by Taf Taf

 

Will the doors of our perception ever be cleansed?

 

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2 days ago • General, Poetry & Art

1

Tired not tired

June 17th, 2018by Ree1222

I am tired of the feeling my body and my life gives me, I feel cheated and taken advantage of. I am not calling my father today to wish him a happy father’s day. I have tried my whole life to develop a solid relationship and believe that he could have shielded me from some of these happenings. Whatever though. I will keep wanting to die until I die because I see no hope, honestly. Please do not compare your life with mine because you don’t know the half.

If I use my method, it fails, I’ll be messed up health wise plus I’ll lose my …

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2 days ago • General

2

my story

June 17th, 2018by 5ara

well i have always been different
i was the girl who was sexually abused by both of her brothers when she was 9
i was the girl who has always been into the sexual stuff
i was the girl who was soooo faaaaaar away ( emotionally ) from her family and she thought that this is normal

then when i was 11 i realized that i should be closer to my mum and i have tried for 2 years but no response and that hurts and gave up
then i started talking to guys online and then i started using fake names and fake pics …

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2 days ago • General

6

Resolve

June 17th, 2018by IronWolf

I need to finish the job. I’m diseased, weak, incompetent, and broken. I am a burden on those around me. The sooner I can shut my brain down, the better.

What little life and social skills I had accumulated have gone away. I am now a hermit, wholly supported by my aging parents at the age of 21. I wasn’t meant for this world, and the only one who can rectify this is myself.

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2 days ago • General

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