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I just posted something earlier on how I stopped cutting three years ago but started again today. Well, I was talking to some friends about it but I didn’t tell them that I started cutting again. You see, my friends and family are the type that judge your every move. If you make a mistake, they won’t forget about it. I’m just tired of living up to their expectations all the damn time. Why can’t they just accept me for who I am? I’m constantly trying to change myself to please them. I was overweight and they didn’t like it so I lost 50 pounds then they said I was too skinny so I gained the weight back and they still don’t like me. Why are they even my friends? I constantly get talked about by them (my family too) and no one sticks up for me. And they wonder why I’m depressed constantly. I just got done cutting and it felt so good. It seems sometimes that I can only turn to cutting because I know it won’t judge. It’s just there to do a simple task. Cut. I talked to my mom earlier today about if I were to start cutting again (I already had) and she told me that if I did, she would basically disown me. My mom is the type that removes the things in her life that cause blemishes. Well to her, I’m a blemish. All I want to do is find someone that will accept me for who I am. Cutting and all. Everything. I hope I find them before I cut too deep one day.