So much has happened to you.  How can you explain it all? I would be talking gibberish if I went through that.
One thing I have learned from my life is that the more bad stuff we have to explain, the less sense we make. People tune it out. They are looking to “fix” our problems and when it gets beyond “fixable”  they tune it out.
Sweetie, go to the Mayo’s clinic.
There is one in Rochchester, Minnesota,  and one in Rockchester , New York.
The Mayo’s clinic is the best.  They will fix you. smile
If your insurance won’t pay, well, then ask for donations.  Ask and you will receive! Smile!
Bless you for what you endured.
My mother went through a somewhat similar situation.  Mind you not the same, but same results. She had a brain tumor. The doctors did not know what was wrong with her. So they blamed her. They said she did not want to work. They said she did not want her children.  They said she should try harder at life.  My dad finally took my mother to Mayo’s clinic.
Mayo’s fixed my mother’s brain tumor. Well, they fixed it the best they could.   See, my mother’s tumor grew bigger and bigger while she was in the care of the local doctors for all those years.  Mayo’s could not undo the damage. They could only shrink the tumor to prevent it from doing further damage.
I also understand your frustration because I have hyperactive children.  I know what does that have to do with anything?  I could not get my hyper active kids the help they needed because I got blamed at every door.
I was told that if I was a better parent that my kids would not be hyper. No one looked hard at their dad. They blamed me the mother.
See,  people point fingers when they can’t FIX  a situation. I don’t get why they love to blame women.
Well, two of my hyper active children are college graduates and going on for their Masters.
You take care, and post me anytime.
Jeannie