I’m just fed up with life in general,  being a good person doesn’t get you anywhere, people don’t appreciate what you do, they don’t bother to see how you’re doing or how you feel. You constantly help others out, doing favors for them listening to their stories, going out of your way to help them, but you’ll get no reward for this instead you’ll just be pulled down further (not referring to the people on this site). You can’t stop being a good person because you’ll end up hating yourself because you’ll feel selfish, I’m always helping others in some way or another and it makes me sick to see how unappreciative they are, part of me thinks they’ll change but I know that won’t happen. I’m just a nice guy who hasn’t had any luck anywhere, I’ve tried to kill myself twice already, I guess miracle boy here is   doomed to be depressed for 80 years, I’ve had no girlfriend at all I came close once but then she straight out hated me for no reason. theres no one out there for me and chances are if there is I’ll never meet her, I know I should change but it’s not a quick fix, eventually you get tired of living dealing with other people’s bullshit, in the end at least I can say I’ve helped out many people, maybe they’ll look back and thank me one day, or maybe they’ll walk on my grave.
nice guys finish last, but some don’t finish at all
5 comments
Hi. You know, I can’t say I’m completely fed up with life right now, because I’ve been maintaining with support from family. I feel lucky in many ways. But I can relate to what you say about helping people who don’t show gratitude, and especially people who seem to hate you for no reason. My “best friend” of 10+ years eventually grew to hate me, and it was clearly because of his psyche and personality, not because I had changed. I put so much money, energy and emotion into our friendship and he turned into some kind of psycho. (Pathological narcissism seems most likely. He meets all the criteria, to a degree that is scary.)
I have another friend who has always been flaky–I’ve known him…well, since forever, it seems. I feel like a real sucker for always hoping things would change. I’ve known for awhile that things weren’t going to change, which is why I feel foolish for hoping, but then I can’t just turn off my feelings like I’m flicking a switch. This time he said that he needs a “break” from talking to me. It’s been 2 months. I’m SO past being fed up with this shit, I think I’m finally ready to just tell him I give up, and that it might be painful but I’m better off without him in my life.
As for being selfish, I’m not a professional or anything so I don’t want to give “advice” but I think it’s better sometimes just to allow ourselves to be “selfish.” NOT hurting people–and definitely not hurting ourselves–but just doing whatever we can to make ourselves feel better. To give ourselves breathing room, away from the pain. However we can do that.
These people just aren’t worth killing ourselves over. OK, maybe you’re talking about people like family members that you can’t really escape, but even so, sometimes we just need to get a million miles away from these fuckers (no offense if fuckers sounds harsh).
I cope by [in addition to talking it out with people when they will listen] taking meds, drink, write, watch movies, take long walks, and recently I discovered this website. I found it by “accident” but I know that consciously or not, I wanted to find a site like this. I used to write long suicide notes when I was a teenager, but I had no ones to send them to (for obvious reasons). This site is like reading all the notes I wanted to write and actually have people read.
Anyway, I really hope that you hold on, and tell people how you feel–if this is the only place you can express your feelings, please do! If you’d like to chat, my e-mail address is kclockejr@hotmail.com
Agreed. (because I can totally relate. I have had gfs but I’m on a long bad streak)
I cant relate, since I am a girl, but I understand how you feel. The feeling of betrayal and sadness hurts really badly.
It’s weird that you mention this, as I just gave this exact same speech two nights ago during a get together. Reason being, I’ve been doing some part-time work for someone and recently he tried to get me to work for free during certain hours or something. I found this to be in incredibly bad taste because I have less money than anyone around, and it’s not like no one knows that. Plus the work is work and there’s no reason why I should do it for free, none at all. So I supplemented this point with the fact that the reason that asshole tried to pull that was because I’m a nice guy, and nice guys finish last. I don’t ***** and complain to him about the work I do for him, if I had been complaining about it, there’s no way he’d have tried to pull that. He did it for the fact that I don’t complain about it and am always in good spirits working (hard to believe but true). You give someone a dollar and now they expect it and also want 5 next time. But you give someone a friendly attitude and they want that ass. What if all of humanity is under alien mind control and this place is actually Hell itself but we see something worth fighting for tooth and nail, the solution being to end our life but it takes some nirvana of transcending death or something in order to see that. What if we’re not defeated at all but the joke and punchline is on all of the living? Who knows? Just a theory I’ve been toying with.
Hi,
well about your theories of allien control, we dont even bother to talk about, right?
I agree with you about the bastard abusers who dont appreciate your giving of yourself. Correct. But because you chose the wrong people. You helped people who did not need it, and you did it maybe because you were expecting that you would be appreciated etc etc .
Choose people who are in real need, particularly children, who havent had a chance to be evil yet. There you will see the difference