people on here tell me to not commit suicide. hm. what if i told you that i am sick. if i told you i was actually sick and lost 10 pounds in the past few months even though i eat, wud u believe me? would u be amazed if i said i am now 80 pounds and am losing more and more?
no. of course not. but its true. and i really dont want to die due to an illness. its my own choice, my death is. and id rather go off in bang than otherwise.
well…this is one of the reasons at least that ill commit suicide. i have many more, but this is a somewhat reason why.
4 comments
i am so jealous that you have lost so much weight, how did you do it? like seriously i want to know. In the past 3 months i have gained 40lbs due to my bulimia-turned binge eating disorder. I hate my body, I hate myself for letting myself go.
Think about how fortunate you are though, the only reason you are suicidal is because of your illness, which I am sure can be treated if you see a doctor, but you havent told us of people bullying/threatening you, your parents havent been abusive, and you havent mentioned even trying to get better. I know it sucks to not have control over your life, but at least try to grasp it, before you let it go.
@hollydaze. u are lucky. i cant gain weight to save my life. (very literal on tht). my doc said if i lost anymore id die probably. i actually look like a haulacaust victim right now.
n thnx for the last comment. i hve previous entries bout more shit tht hve happened to me. i will attempt for control…but most likely fail. i kno my life dnt suck as much but i still h8 it.
please dont kill yourself, its ultimately your choice, but i beg of you not to….use what time you have left to help others to make a difference…sont just end your life…its not worth it…you mean more than just another statistic, if you want to talk, ever, you can talk to me, i want to help, i know its hard now, but you can get better if you want to
hollydaze, please don’t say that zdeathchanz is lucky… he lost weight because he is physically ill. hollydaze, you should be lucky that you have control over food and zdeath does not. I watched my grandmother starve to death after having her stomach removed due to cancer. He body couldn’t digest food. she didn’t have control. and because of that, I have learned to be thankful that my body does what it is supposed to do. I hope one day you can learn to do the same.