The thoughts thatI have begin when I first get up in the morning.
I feel like my life has no meaning to it. Like i’m not going anywhere so I should just give up now.
My family would never understand if I told them so I jus keep it to myself.
These thoughts started to come more often a couple months ago, and I can’t control them. Every time I see something I think “how could I use that to end my life right this second?”
I don’t have any fun anymore, I don’t laugh, I don’t smile, I don’t do anything except sit in my house.
My though is, if I’m not going to aspire to anything great, what is the point of me being on this earth?
I feel like I am a waste of space and someone else could take all the money that it costs to keep me alive and do something much greater with themself.
I think my problem is that I just don’t care about anything. And for a while it was a good way to live because not a lot of things bothered me. But then I realized that nothing at all bothered me. I wasn’t feeling anything for anyone. Not even for myself.
About 5 or 6 years ago, I would cut myself. I didn’t think anything of it. I just thought it was cool. But then now that I look back, I realize that u have been having these kind of thoughts since I was about 9.
I haven’t done anything drastic yet, but every day these feelings get worse and I feel like one day I am going to act on my thought and I won’t be in this world anymore.
I don’t know if I need someone to talk to, or if I need medication, or what is going on.
Thats all I have to say.
3 comments
You should maybe consider doing some voluntary work. Sounds weird I know, but might help you get some perspective. If you were to spend your time helping others who are less fortunate, that would give your life meaning. This is kinda hypocritical coming from me given that I plan to commit suicide in a couple of days, but even so, exhaust every possibility before putting a permanent end to your life.
just some food for thought…
Go talk to somebody you seem young so am I but save yourself before its too late.
Hello why_try. Alot of what you’re going through can be said the same for me. You know my future still seems dark and uncertain but I’m willing to step into the unknown because I have friends now who give me courage to try for a better life where I’m able to feel emotions instead of being numb and seeing the world in the gloomiest greys and blacks. If you don’t mind me asking how old are you now? I could be your friend if you want to.