I’ve chosen a day. This time I will not fail. I am happy. School will have just ended and I wouldn’t have seen any of my “friends” over the summer either. So no one will know. Only the essential family. I will disappear. Like I’d never been alive. So perfect.
I am anxious for June 1st, but I recognize that wishing it were here already is just going to irritate me. So I’m going to try and live as carefree as possible a life for the next month and a half. Anyways, my question is: Does anyone have any suggestions for me before I go? Things I should do? Please let me know, as I am fairly young and would like to go out with as much experience as possible.
(This might beg the question “Well, why are you killing yourself if you want to experience life? Seems kinda counterintuitive.” To which I respond: My life is unbearable to live. I hate it and everything about it. My future is bleak and desolate. I have no wish to live a life in this world.)
So please, anything you can think of that I should do before I die?
9 comments
Well, you can help others people, act as a volunteer in a city project, red cross,etc . Since if you do anything which benefits to you, it will be a waste of time.
Get away from all the unhappiness. Try to do everything that does make you happy. Who knows hopefully you will find something worth sticking around for. I really hope you do stick around you seem to be a very bright intelligent person and the world needs more people like that. Sincerly. Tami
@javalino
The volunteering thing is good. I will keep it in mind. Thank you.
@Murphy
I am attempting to be as happy as possible. I keep hoping something will change, but I’ve spent about 10 years waiting and it never does. It’s not worth the suffering anymore. And thank you for the compliment.
y r u unhappy? i understand unhappiness, just want to no your story..n if june 1st is your target date well then all of us have until then to get to know you..so i personally hope to hear from you, ive got my issues, thats y im here…..shout back! 😀
maybe you can try writing a book about something that interests you or a journal, then you will have something that people will remember you for
@maibri
Well, there are numerous reasons for my unhappiness: one is that I’m just not a generally happy person, never have been. Another would be complete and utter loneliness (which will not be changing anytime soon). The fact that I fail at everything (not on purpose, I just do). Also, I think I’d be able to deal with these things a little easier if I didn’t look into my future and just see things getting worse. If I’m at one of my best points in life right now and I’m ready and fully determined to commit suicide, I can’t imagine what a normal or particularly bad part of my life might be like. I have no wish to live a life in this world at all. I just don’t. Thanks for asking, it was really nice. 🙂
@hated-one
I don’t know about a book. I’ve tried writing multiple books before but I don’t think its a perfect thing for me. I do have an ever-expanding collection of poems, which I’m leaving to my best friend. (I’ve also posted some of them on here, I try to every night.) But other than her, I don’t really want people to remember me, I just want them to forget me and be happy. I know my memory would only bring pain, I feel like that would be selfish. Even asking her to remember makes me feel a little guilty. I don’t want to make anyone sad. Thanks for the suggestion!
Unlike, most people on this website, I won’t tell you to stop or that it will get better. It didn’t get better for me. I’m not much older so I can’t judge too much from my own experience. I’m 18 and I’ve been thinking about suicide ever since I was young, I also have found the perfect painless method. If you’re interested in the method then look up the Exit Bag. Cheers
Thank you. I have a method set up, but I am always looking for alternative’s/back-ups. I like to keep an open mind.