Here lately I think about  It every day!! I’m just soo tired of everything! I’m tired of  living, tired of  hurting, tired of crying all the time, I just want to die! No on knows how I feel, not even my husband. You know I can even remember wanting to die and praying to die every night when I was 6, 11, 14, so on and so forth. That is the main thing I  remember about growing up. Although the reason’s have only piled up since then. I feel like everyone around me would be better of and happier if  I just died. Sometimes I feel like it’s the only wake to make my family happy. I feel like I’m only alive because I’m to much of a coward to do something about it. I can’t talk to my husband, he would never understand. Though I have tried, everythings fine as long as I keep everything bottled up inside, thing is I’ve been doing that all my life and I’m tired of it. I just don’t know how to handle it anymore, which why I think about suicide everyday here lately, It’s not that I don’t love my husband and kids, I do soooo much. They’re the only reason I’m still alive, If it weren’t for them I would’ve done it a very long time ago. Just needed to rant.
3 comments
I understand that going through tough times but comit suicide will never be better than the probles you must face in life. We all have a reason to live you just have to find it. Don’t hold in your feelings people need to know so they can help. Have hope.
If you have been feeling like ending your life at different times while growing up, and your still here with us now, I believe your will to live is much greater than your will to die. Sometimes you can find someone other than your husband to confide in, a close friend or relative perhaps? Your family loves you just as much, remember that.
I read that and felt like you was talking about me
I also have been holding everything in for a long long time but it does not work the presure and desire just gets stronger and stronger. Sometimes verbalizing your thoughts and feelings can give a little relief. I’m still working on telling loved ones but maybe if you get use to telling us how you feel here it will get easier to tell them.
Jules x