the fall back guy

I agree with Elleonil. If you keep in touch with her, there’s no way you won’t end up being the fall back guy. In some ways you already are. She tells you about how she has really bad fights with her boyfriend, and then she ends up being on the phone all night with you. You’re actually doing some of the boyfriend’s work for him. If she had nobody else to make her feel better, she might realize this relationship is making her miserable and decide to leave him. But the way things are right now, you cheer her up enough that she doesn’t have to make any decision. She stays with her boyfriend, fights with him, calls you at night, gets attention and affection from someone else, wakes up the next day, keeps talking to her boyfriend, you are actually being your own worst enemy in this situation. You definitely are being used, and it’ll only get worse if they actually break up. Don’t be somebody else’s emotional safety net. You’re doing all these things for her, spending time with her, talking to her on the phone all night, yet you’re not the one who gets the privelage of being called her boyfriend, somebody else does. It’s like you’re doing all of the work and getting none of the benefits. If I were you, I would try to back off a little bit. And if she ever comes running up to you one day to tell you she’s single now and thinks she wants to be with you, please, PLEASE be smart enough to encourage her to spend some time just being single to deal with the baggage of her last relationship and to fully get over it. The biggest mistake you can make is to be there as a rebound when her relationship eventually ends. She will use you for a while (like she already is) and a few months later you’ll be posting on a website like this totally miserable because she broke your heart.