I was only 6 years old when I was told I was to fat and my grandparents bribed me with $100 to lose 20 pounds… I did but little id I know this was just the beginning to my eating disorder…. Threw out schooling all the kids forced me to go on diets so I would look how they wanted and be like them so they did’t haft to been seen with ugly old me… After a while my parents joined into the torment… for as long as I can remeber I binged my problems away.. around grade 4 I started starving myself to be […]
Tag:
6 Years
My life has no meaning. I spend almost all my time doing nothing, when i try to do something different, i fail and feel like i can;t do anything. since i was 6 years old, my older sister would of called me names and yelling to me im incapable and retarded. It might sound like it’s not so bad but then again i have my mother yelling and shouting to me how much of horrible daughter. she tells me how my brother and sister are better and that she would of never got me in this world if she knew what i was going to […]
Im out eating at resyraunt,please understand that this is a big deal tp me i havnt done this ina while then when i mormally wpuld like 6 years ago
Lately I’ve been crying myself to sleep every night. i keep seeing my dads dead body when I close my eyes at night or I dream that he is still alive. It’s twisted because when I was still in the womb he attempted to stab me. I hated hearing that as I grew up. He was a drug addict, and had about 6 fatal infections leading up to his death. The flesh eating one is what killed him two years ago a week before my 16th birthday. We had a rocky relationship. From the age of 6-12 he abused me. I lived with him […]
I’m coming closer and closer to the day when finally the pain and misery of my life is greater than my ability to be able to cope with it.
I graduated college in 2007 with a Bachelor’s degree in Economics. Since then, I have applied to 1000s of positions. I can count the amount of just interviews I’ve had on two hands. I can’t even get hired on to bag groceries or work fast food.
I sleep on my parents’ couch. The only way I will ever get out of here is by dying. I have no money and as stated before absolutely no chance of finding […]
Let’s just fall into this.
”I wish someone cared about me when I was a child.”
”I wish I was strong enough to raise myself.”
If someone cared I would have been a much different person and not the garbage I am now.
If someone raised me because I can’t do it alone. If someone actually loved me because I never felt loved or even wanted here.
If my dad would have held my hand as a child instead of saying with an angry tone: ”I don’t need to hold your hand do I?! Come on!”
If my mom would have hugged me as a child instead of […]
My mother hates me. I dont know why she does, I have four siblings and she nevertalks to them the way she does me. She’s always looking fr something to shout at me for. I lost count of how many times she’s told me to go kill my self or how she wishes that one morning she’d wake up and find me dead. I’ve no one to talk to and it hurts. Growing up all I knew was abuse from my mom and brother she hit me with text books for getting wrong answers when I was 6 years old. When we would go out […]
Well, I’ve been psycho for past few months. I got betrayed by my friend, live bullying and shit. Some damn kids use the adult relationships to ruin my life since kid. They bully me for so many years already and still do. It’s very humiliating cause they’re like 6 years or younger than me.
At school, I am forced to tell jokes to please my friends. I just get addicted to it. I couldn’t quit.
I also got severe pain or knife moving inside my face. Yes, I mean KNIFE. It mutated, moves and hurts like hell for every damn second for the past decade. It’s like […]
My name is Benjamin and i’m 13 years old and a half. I’m an atheist and i live in Montreal. My first language is french and my second is english. I have a disease called hemophilia since i was born. Its a disease that makes your body more vulnerable to injuries. That means that when i’m hurt, it will hurt more longer and it will take more time to recover. I’ve been hurt to my ankle a lot so now i’m in a wheel chair and i can’t walk for a long time. I am a sportive guy and i love sports especially hockey and […]
My ex husband walked out on me because of my severe mental illness that happened 6 years into our 8 year marriage. He left me for being sick. For trying to get help. I has to leave my son for a month to try and get help. I thought I was doing good and so was our marriage for the month before he left. I wasn’t cutting and I was happy and didn’t want to die. He walked out on us.
Now I’m married again and I don’t feel my husband is attracted to me. He accepts my mental illness because he has it too. My […]
Everyone always says my mom is so nice but she is the most evil person I ever met.
And she doesn’t even hit me like my brother and father used to.
I’m at a part in my life now where I wish I had parents, where I wish they raised me.
Because I realize they didn’t and that made me become this nothing.
They never encouraged me to do anything, I didn’t even have to go to school. They only made me feel neglected, abandoned and lonely.
I wasn’t strong enough as a child to raise myself. I’m not strong enough now to do everything alone. […]
Im not a very important person. I don’t tell people about my problems. I have many. They drive me insane. I wish I was better person. I cant tell anyone abut this side of me except my only friend cole. he is the only one who will ever understand me. ever.
this is a list 0f my problems
1.im different
2.i cut
3.i am bulimic and anorexic
4.suicidal
5.family death
6.commitment issues
7.my mother has been dating a married man I hate for 6 years
8.my family thinks there’s something wrong with me
9.bullied
10.no friends
11.awkward
12.shy
13.anger issues
14.migranes
15.lack of sleep
16.i hear voices
17.cant focus
18.sexualy abused by half sister [longstory]
and last of all
19.i cant stand myself
please help, my family or […]
Why doesn’t anyone help me?
They are just waiting for me to change.
I haven’t left my room in 6 years now. I’m reaching the point where I really don’t want to live anymore.
I never smile and they think I’m happy.
I’ve been feeling sick from agony the last few days, can barely eat. It hurts my soul to breath.
Please, I want to die and I dont want anyone to remember me.
I’m so lonely
That’s it. Â It will be a mercy killing if I off myself. Â I’ve been pondering/obsessing over this for 6 years now and I think I’m getting to the point where I need to make a decision or live another 60 years of torment. Â I can’t keep putting this off.
I am 39 years old I have thought about suicide since I was 6 years old. My life has always been so difficult. I had one person that kept me alive and that is my dad. I didn’t want to disappoint him. Now I live for my son but my life is imploding and I just think about dying more and more. It makes me sad to think of leaving my son but its just too much. I feel broken, bullied, abused, abandoned and alone. Today my husband let me know that I am a failure, an idiot, a fat fuck, a loser and a […]
I am new here. I attempted suicide about 3 weeks ago, twice in less than 24 hours. The first time I was found by my siblings who got into my house and the second time, I was found by the police. I ended up in the hospital unconscious for two days and spent a further day in a ward with old people, who were bed ridden. I was under constant observation, not even able to go to the toilet unattended. As a psychology student, it was one of the most degrading and humiliating experiences of my life. I felt so ashamed facing my family after […]
I’ve been depressed for about 6 years. Â I’ve been thinking pretty much these thoughts throughout the entirety of that time period- the thoughts becoming more complex and clear or unclear as time passed. Â I’m 18 now. Â It has been especially bad this year getting ready for college. Â The thoughts of moving out and beginning the rest of my life are eating away at me. Â I never really thought I would get this far but I did. Â The fact that I’ve only been here 18 years is killing me. Â I’ve only been here 18 years. Â How can I possibly put up with 70 more years […]
It doesn’t hurt to grow up poor. It doesn’t hurt when your daughter is born with medical problems. It doesn’t hurt not being there when your father died. It doesn’t hurt not being there when your step-father died. It doesn’t hurt when you sacrifice happiness for duty. It doesn’t hurt having your dog put down. It doesn’t hurt not being there when your grandmother died. It doesn’t hurt not being there when your “other†mother died. It doesn’t hurt not being there when your uncle died. It doesn’t hurt when you sacrifice happiness for others. It doesn’t hurt watching others destroy what you built. It […]
Same old boring bad background like everyone else:
-My sister died when I was younger, and I still feel like it was my fault that she died.
-My parents split
-Living in poverty since then
– Haven’t lived in the same house for over a year in like 6 years, Â eviction has met us more than once
-Don’t have anyone to trust
This year was the first time I really started to think about suicide seriously.  I was talking to the school psychologist about it and all she did was question me, “Do you have a plan?”, “What steps would you take?”.  Then she made me call a hotline and I for […]
i can’t even begin to recount the times i’ve tried to kill myself – i started in 2nd grade – i’ve been married nearly 20 years – 4 children –
i’ve been hospitalized twice – once as an adult 2 years a go
i’m not diagnosed as personality disorder – but as i’ve read about it – i’m pretty sure i am – but this total break didn’t come until a family member did the most treacherous betrayal deed that could be done –
i never grieved the horrid act against me – but my child –
that was 6 years a go – and for me – it […]
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