I’m depressed in really weird streaks. I’ll be to the point where I need to cut every freaking night and think about suicide for a while, and then it will let up for a short time, I still won’t be happy, but I won’t be cutting. It also always seems to strike worse in the night, thats when I usually really feel hopeless.
I don’t know why it changes. If I think about it, I always feel alone, with no prospects for meaningful friendships. I never get hopeful, just not depressed. Does this phenomenon happen to anyone else?
4 comments
Me too. I’ve also been wondering if that happened to anyone else. For days at a time I just hide in my room, or at night I feel like committing suicide out of no where. It’s weird.
Yes. All the time actually.
I’ve felt like that. Not so much the cutting but the suicidal feelings. Night time scares me for numerous reasons. Oddly when I’m physically outside and it happens to be night I’m not as scared. It’s hard to explain but you aren’t alone.
It’s like a neutral state also. Not sad not depressed, not necessarily filled with hope but not hopeless either. That in between
Thank you for the insights. It is true, with the neutral state and the being outside. Maybe I should start sleeping in the yard, haha. It is good not to be alone.