has this happend to anyone else?

sadly we cannot chose our parents or the life they want to give us… I used to live in Vancouver and whenever I saw a homeless person I felt always so bad and I used to wonder how did they end up being like that.
I have a older sister… she chose drugs over everything, she screwed up so bad that she was a homeless person for a while and then she had 2 kids and she abandoned them for drugs. My nice was born with brain damage because of the drugs she did… pretty sad.

I used to hate her so much, I used to wish she was death, she tried to kill herself many times, last one she almost did it.

Now I’m here, I used to have the perfect life and I lost everything including my mind… now I understand the homeless and I understand my sister… I never have done drugs and I will never do, but honestly I really want to take something to help me to make it thru the day, and at night I wish with all my soul I had pills to put me to sleep.

Guess when someone has issues and uses drugs the result is always messy, I think that after too much pain and struggle you forget how it feels like to be a human being, something in your head breaks and you start falling down spiral, non stop… I used to be really strong and smart, 4 months ago I stared to falling down. Nothing helps, I spend days without talk or go out, pulling my hair and crying all time…

Not trying to justify your dad, not at all!! but there is not point on hate him or to wish he could understand. Your dad doesn’t think like a normal person would…
Hope you will stay away from him and try to put all this behind, you have a good life waiting for you 🙂