Sometimes I just feel like giving up

Its not something I want to feel though. Because I know damn well I have so much ahead of me in life and I can’t just give up just like that. But the shit I’ve been through just barely pushes me over the edge sometimes. I often find myself thinking about how normal other peoples lives are and how I wish I was in their position. I think I’m too much of a ***** to commit suicide anyways,  I dunno. I just feel like God has so much in life to offer for me. I have plenty of people to talk to but when it comes to sharing my problem, I’m not the type. I don’t want that “I feel like giving up” feeling to come back. Even though it’s starting to occur again, I want it to stop. I just want to be happy & free, and I don’t want anything to get in the way of me being that anymore. Because I’m just done with the bullshit, you know?