There is this man who once abused my sister at age 13. This man had never laid a hand on me. Then one day, my sister did something that got her sent off. This man had no one to take his anger out on… he wouldn’t touch two innocent young boys, or a fragile schizophrenic mother, no he went for me, the broken, depressed child. This man has called me many things, *****, dumb ass, liar, mother fucker, slut… This man one day got mad and took me and slapped my face, then slammed me up against the wall, which was with such force that i was unable to breathe afterwards. And when i was sitting there crying, gasping for breath, this man said suck it up. This man lives not only outside my head, no now, he haunts my thoughts and memories.
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Take pictures of your injuries and report it asap.
i know how you feel. the scars, the pain of being singled out. the misery of how the most crucial years of development are spent in a hell on earth. you must use this sadness to build strength. the hard part is over now. you made it thru the ordeal. i dont reallylike this saying but sometimes “what doesnt kill you makes you stronger”.
Its like four years ago that this happened.
If you are in a situation where you are in danger then go to the police, if this has stopped happening then its time to heal, I hope you can go to your dr and get some medication to help with that process, and it might help to talk to your close family if you can about what happened it might help to write all these emotions down.
Are you safe now?
Mostly
There are therapies to help you release emotional/physical abuse. Any negativity that comes from anyone is all about them not you, it’s not your fault but you’re carrying the crap he projected on to you. It was in no way cool.
When you feel ready, I would find someone to help you through this & you will come through stronger…it’s how this kind of stuff works. Forgive yourself for having had the experience. You are the one carrying this awful feeling around within you…so go within and forgive yourself first. That’s how my healing began anyway & it didn’t seem to make sense at the beginning but it does now. Take care.