pretENDing

Pretending everythings fine is exhausting. Its taken everything I’ve got in me to keep this facade up. I’ve got nothing left. I try every damn day to get out of this cycle of depression. I try to push the suicidal thoughts down, and I don’t know how many more days (hours) I can continue. I’ve got a home, people who love me,I’m
not rich but not poor either. But what I have whats killing me is of course depression. The pills don’t work, nor does the therapy. This has gone on long enough. No cries for help, no timetable, just a moment will come when my fear of the pain of life will overcome my fear of the momentary pain of death……