Dear God
I hate you, you’re an asshole. Why am I still alive? You can’t do this to me, this is not fair and you know it. You have millions for torture, why me?  Is this some kind of revenge? This is a mistake and you’re  wrong. Is not fair and you can’t do this, is the worst thing you’ve ever done. Why you didn’t kill me, as you promised? I hate you, I hate you, I hate you.
93 comments
Why do you blame God? He never promised to kill you and He never promised to keep you alive. You live today, that’s all that matters. You can change things. If you’re dead, you can do nothing anymore. Anything can happen as long as you’re still alive.
So, welcome back 🙂
I believe in fate not god. God died along time ago. Fate is what kept you alive. Maybe Fate wanted you to find us.
In some part of the bible he says that when you want something you just have to tell him. Well, I told him and he didn’t wanted to do it, so I can blame him for not saying the truth.
I don’t think faith ca kill me.
The bible = the most confusing fiction novel in the world.
God does not give you all that you want. If you ask your parents for a Ferrari, do you get it? No, not usually. If you ask your parents to go kill that hobo down the street there, then no, you wont get what you want. It’s the same with God. Some things He just does not allow for you.
Take it easy, no need to rush it. You’re not running a marathon here.
If God existed there would not be any sins. Humanity would not have spread like cancer across the Earth. Humanity would not have started ruining the planet. These things would not have started if God were real.
Have you read the Bible, Greed? It was not God that brought sin into this world. And if you’ve read the Bible then you should also know WHY he lets these things happen to us. Why it’s been happening for centuries, milleniums now.
If he were real we would all be DEAD. You enjoy the gifts of humanity’s Greed every day. If god were real he would have stopped us. He didn’t. Greed has given every thing to humanity. Greed drives humanity to expand and suceed. Greed drives us to give ourselves comfort.
Let me ask you a philosphical question, Greed.
There’s a classroom full of children. There’s also a teacher. That teacher writes down a math problem on the board. Then explains how to solve it and what the final answer is. There’s one kid in class, though, who disagrees with the teacher and says the answer is wrong. What do you think the teacher should do?
The teacher should check their problem for mistakes then check the child’s.
So you say the teacher would make the child give his own solution, right? And it turns out the child’s answer was wrong.
That’s what God did. He let a child try his own solution. Did it work? Is the World a good place? No.
I’m not saying God exists, but I’m not denying his existance either. There are answers for everything. The Bible has given them. You just need to find them. Or, if you’re not religious, then find your own solutions to life. Everyone can make a change in their own life.
What if the childs answer was right. You religous people make for good amusement. Tell me more why he exists?
I’m not religious, I’m agnostic. I’ve just studied the Bible a lot, because it fascinates me.
But is the child’s answer right, then? How’s it like living on this Planet right now? This is the work of that child. How do you like it?
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! I LOVE IT! There nothing but Greed here. Every where you look you see the effects of Greed!
Good for you.
It is.
🙂
Well well well…religion. I don’t see so much as an argument as a conflict. Shall we put our religion aside? God’s dead? So what. Maybe then humanity always had free will. Tis a possibility that we have a clockmaker god, but really does it matter? We will never understand religion if it’s true, and never cease explaining it if it’s false. Let’s leave religion alone in this forum.
Alright, I agree. It sometimes makes me sad about people’s ignorance though 🙁 I mean, I’m not religious and I respect other people, but the way they say things makes me sad. Why don’t they think first? 🙁
I wonder the same thing. Hahahahahahahahahahahahah!!!
People don think first because people don’t seem to care. They rule by their biases and shove religion down other’s throats. I’m biased. Very, it’s true I kind of have a grudge against christians. I shouldn’t let my past experiences rule me…but they’re the reason I’m on this site. So I guess I can see why people never think before they speak
I agree with her.
Happy birthday, just the same. 🙂
Not everyone shoves their religion down your throat. But at least here you feel safe. 🙂 If I were there, I’d hug you.
🙂 thanks. I’m terribly biassed because I was a Hindu at a catholic school. I got beaten up so many times 🙁
But now you’re stronger. I’m not saying it was a good thing, but I feel that every bad thing has a good thing in it. Now you wont let just random people shove their thoughts into you. You’ve been so strong in your life!
Now you can slowly start to put your personal opinions behind you. You don’t have to listen to people, but you don’t have to blow them off right away. Make rational decisions. 🙂
Sigh…why don’t people understand…when they are talking and ranting at God…they are only talking to themselves…we are God…as such our experiences are self determined. Our life is what we make it. We can’t stop bad things from happening to us…but we can change how we think and feel about it…and ourselves…or we can try to blame someone else…and then we really have no control…now do we? So if this is all God’s fault…you are helpless…and that is just not true…it is a choice for the most part…we don’t chose our lives…we just choose what to do with it.
Pontification Over…and I am not religious myself….but I worked a 12 step program for sure…hahaha
Was it your birthday? If so…use this as the starting point to make a new life and reality for yourself…one small step at a time. If it’s God’s fault…your helpless, if it’s your parents fault…again your helpless, if it’s your friends fault…again your helpless, if it’s the governments fault…your really helpless..hahaha…but if the fault is in your own thinking?…well that you have total control over…you and no one or nothing else…just you…and I know you can do it.
Peace
Amakua
I try…I now go to a mainly Christian school…I’m not as mean as I could be. I know, not necessarily good, but I can’t let go of what hurt me so much so easily. My one friend at school, another Hindu and I were sent to the hospital because we believed something different then people. I was told to kill myself so many times because I believed something different. In the winter I walked half a mile to the train station to get home barefoot because they stole my shoes. I don’t think all Christians are bad…I just don’t see god in them. I don’t think that god will stop them. They almost killed my friend. We were seven years old 🙁
^ what she said. 😀
I must convince myself there is some good reason, some good purpose for all this human suffering, otherwise I would not be able to endure it. At this point however, even ‘with’ the conviction my suffering is for some ultimate goodness, I am not sure how long I shall continue to endure such a sacrifice for ultimate goodness, for God, or for the Great Whatever.
Wow, this is amazing. Now talking a little about my point on the entry (my birthday) this day can’t be a starting. It started like a miserable day: my only real friend in the world, a bird, escaped. What a great day. I hate my birthday, this is cruelly ironic.
*what Ama said
Solitary, it sounds cliche, but it will get better. Why not change schools, btw?
Lol funny. I lived in Denmark. It was the only school that had an English program. Yeah it does sound pretty cliche 😛 I’ll give you that. Some people don’t believe it’s true. Eh. Believe what you want, it doesn’t matter to me. If I know it’s true no one can take that from me…although I wish they could
Penny and also Andy, we are here for you guys. If no one else is your friend, then we are.
I go to solitary’s school and if you uncover it its easy to see. Our whole town is racist. Our whole school is nothing more than a racist stereotype cesspit.
You’ve come so far, solitary! Life has things you can enjoy 😀 We just have to find them and not be negative.
Change has to start with yourself. Change schools if you have to, because living in a hateful environment is not good.
I am not religious but I can assure all of us of this: there is some form of higher power, higher intelligence, and higher knowledge in our very own (normally) unconscious brain and body processes.
(Holy sh*t, this post! :D)
Yep. Greed’s right. Also thank you Sinine…I’ll try to get farther. But the people who don hate me are afraid of me. I have a good amount of friends at least, maybe around fifteen. But where Greed and I live is a very rackets, homophobic community. Because of this I’m trying harder and harder to look past religion, so I don’t end up mindlessly hating a group like these people are
That’s good, Andy 😀 We CAN make a change ourselves!
At home its a harmful enviroment, my school is a harmful enviroment! My parents wouldn’t let me change schools. I’m trapped in my personal Hell.
I want to give EACH AND EVERY ONE OF YOU big hugs! <3 I love all of you! If no one else does, I do! Make steps towards a good life, people! That makes me love you even more!
At least you have your girlfriend Greed. She’ll always help you. And the people at my table, when they’re not promoting drugs they can help you too
I only have solitary. The rest don’t understand.
Okay then. At least I’ll always be there.
Greed, how old are you?
If you’re 18+, then it’s easy. If not, then it’s gonna be tough. But you need to step in that one direction and not look back. You CANNOT give up.
Greed, the more you talk to others, the more they understand. That’s one good thing about people. They have empathy and logical thinking. They understand if you talk to them.
I have already gone insane! 😀 I DON’T GIVE A SHIT ANYMORE!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Alrigt.
I have fifty min. before i go back to my hell.
Greed. Please, you know in two years you can leave your parents forever. Leave this town forever. But for now, for your girlfriend, for me, for hartsough even, you’ve got to talk to people for help. Not shrinks, but people on this site. People that you can trust
I’m done trusting those who end up stabbing me in the back.
When will I ever stab you in the back Greed? I’ll always stand up for you, you can trust me.
I do. But you and only you. Everyone else will just through me away like my parents did.
Luckily for you, Greed, we can’t stab you in the back since we’re anonymous people behind a screen. There’s no need to push help away, when it’s given.
🙁 trust them too please? I’ve trusted them for years, no one on this site has betrayed my trust.
Fine. But don’t through me under the bus because don’t turn out to be perfect. They did.
You don’t need to be perfect. I’m not perfect either.
Eh. No one’s perfect. We all understand that
They wanted me to be because their other children, my step brothers and sister, are horrible. Thats what they say to me.
I don’t want you to be perfect. I like you better with at least some flaws; shows you’re still human, not a fucking puppet.
Greed, they should be happy to have you. You’re wonderful, your smart, if it wasn’t for your parents you would be close to perfect.
I DON’T WANT TO BE PERFECT DAMMIT!!! I WANT TO BE ME!
You ARE you. No matter what.
I know. You are you. You’ll never be perfect. No one will. So if being perfect is the equivalent of losing you identity to perfection *which I’m almost making sound like a good thing, pay no heed to that* you have nothing to worry. People don’t want you to change.
In thirty minutes i’ll be at home. My hell.
So tell us who ME is then Greed…if you wouldn’t mind. I don’t really know anything about you other than you sorta hate your family. Care to share? And we are all unique here…and either suicidal or survivors…so there is no judgement here…but lose the anger…it is counter productive…we want to help.
Yes…who are you really Greed…and I want to hear good and bad…cuz we’re also all a mixture of both in varying degrees…hahaha
Peace
Ama
You will survive, Greed. You. Will. Survive. Say that to yourself everytime you feel like you can’t go on.
Who am i? I am Greed. Humanity’s nature. I’m also a survivor. I am trying to move past this but my parents aren’t letting me.
I am the want of humanity. My stress is making me go crazy but so what?
Yes, Greed, you ARE a survivor. No matter what bullshit you go through, you get a medal that says that you’ve survived this far. You will get more of those medals! Get them, ALL OF THE MEDALS!
Well that’s sorta evasive isn’t it?…hahaha I meant…what is your favourite subject?…do you have any hobbies or talents? how old are you?…any idea what you want to be or study?…what interests do you have?…what kind of music do you listen to?…is there anything about your attempt you would like to share with others?…what are you feeling besides anger…ie. pain, fear, loneliness…like that…ummm…what colour eyes do you have?…what was the last nice thing you did for yourself or another?…see what I mean…we would like to get to know you…not just your problem…quote unquote.
Again…we’ve all been there…some more than others…and there is no judgement here. I’m extending my hand…wanna shake?
Peace
Ama
hell
@PennyRoyalTea
You are only making excuses to not have to try…everyday is a new day…and heck…next Thursday could be your next birthday…when you finally wake up from your hellish dream and realize life is out here waiting for you…just you. Don’t give up on yourself…you are worth the fight.
Hope you have better days ahead…btw…I hate birthdays myself…hahaha
Peace
Amakua
Thank you, Sinine.
You’re welcome, Andy 🙂
Religion is a big fraud, another institution of illusion for the intellectually stunted masses to be sucked in and chewed up by. Mankind created religion. Mankind created mass society (of which religion is a big part), which I believe is responsible for the depression/suicide epidemic. So if you want to place blame, place it with mass society/culture, not “god” (too many gods have been created by humans anyway…which god are you talking about?).
You can’t say all religion is a fraud. Have you tried believing all of them? The hundreds and thousands of them?
Everyone believes what they want to believe. You believe that, other people believe otherwise. It’s free will.
I don’t follow my own religion because I associate it with it’s followers. Some of them listen to holy music and try to be your friend whilst harbouring a deep rooted hatred for you. They do this because they are snide deceitful evil people gaining your trust so they can destroy your life from the inside. The rest all know what goes on yet they condone it. The poison within them. When others suffer it’s gratifying. I’m not ashamed to say I have given serious consideration to joining the BNP, when you have two enemies it makes sense to join one and at least they you know where you stand. I believe that if they were the elected majority my life would have turned out better than it did. The only reason I don’t is because I don’t agree with any of their policies, they have no realistic prospect of success and the weak will suffer whilst the worst escape as usual. I hope they read this and know, if I could get them in one building, it’s all over. The world will be a better place.
It’s your own choice what you do, Fin. Whatever you believe in is right for you.
That said, not every religious person is like that; deceitful and dishonest. I know people of various religions and some of them act nice and some don’t. It’s them, not the religion they believe in.
I am not against religion. I have no choice. I’m a reject because I’m westernised and have freedom to do what I want. The problem is that it’s used under the guise that these people are good and everyone falls for it. They make me out to be a piece of shit.
Everyone has a choice. When it seems like you don’t, you still do.
Don’t beat yourself up about it so much. Take it easy, eat chocolate and listen to music. 🙂
I suppose everyone becomes like that when they’ve experienced things. I don’t think it’s possible to be racists against yourself. If our assets were frozen and we were all deported that would be a dream scenario. But at the same time why should everyone suffer because of a few people I don’t like. It’s too irrational. I will get what I want one day even if it costs me my life.
What DO you want out of life, Fin?
I cannot get what I want but I’ll settle for something else. From the time I wake up to the time I go to sleep I think about nothing else. Even if it takes 10 years, I won’t stop. Its in my nature.
That’s good, Fin! 😀 not everyone has your drive to go on like that. It’s nice, it motivates other people as well. 🙂
That’s one word for it. Unfortunately I am not going to be in a position to execute this plan immediately unless I get help from people to solve my problems permanently.
We can’t help your permanent problems, since we’re just people behind screens. You need to take the first step and go out to look for help yourself.
Of course not. No one here can help me with this kind of problem and even if they could, I wouldn’t ask. I don’t really trust anyone. Have to look after myself. The world will never change.
To Everybody,
I never saw so much ass kissing in my life! I want to kiss everyone’s ass right now SWAK!
You people said so…………………much I only can add 2 things
1) You are what you eat.
2) You are what you think.
PennyroyalTea,
Happy Birthday!