I’ve been at a low point for many years (and since I’m 17 that’s a lot)
I was heavily bullied, I had suffered home abuse and loss, I self harmed, my grades were dropping drastically. I had a trunk load of self hate, saw no way out.
I attempted on January 2012, I failed, obviously. Though things looked up, the day out of hospital I found a new girlfriend.
5 months later, I ruin things, she can’t deal with my problems. She leaves me after I have a mental breakdown. Weeks later she sleeps with my Friend/Brother. I survive these next few months, barely.
Now 7 months after that, I give no shits for my ex, I have a new, lovely girlfriend, Best friends I could get, no family issues, no bullying, not so much school issues. Booked a holiday in Benidorm this summer.
Yet still, I fantasize about suicide, I wish for nothing more than to be buried six feet under.
I have dealt with much more than this, why can I not be happy?
I don’t even feel any better. Kill me.