I hate myself

I hate myself. It’s as though I always give people a reason to not trust me, or I give myself a reason to not trust myself, even though I think I’m doing fine. Whatever I’m doing seems to not ever be good enough, from grades to chores. I don’t fucking care if I am “inexperienced” or if my problems “aren’t as bad,” because one day I’ll look back and see how stupid I was. That basically proves that life gets worse. They fucking matter now! Doesn’t anyone trust me? I do my homework. Ok, maybe I’m not as good with chores as I used to be, but I do almost everything with the dog except walks. I hate school because my parents seem to think that the only way to do well is to do nothing but homework on school nights because oftentimes when I am watching TV or something on a school night, one of them will ask why I’m not studying. I literally just want to yell, “Because I have a motherfucking life outside of stupid school!” I’m glad the school year is almost done so I can finally be free for a little while.