I got home from school to see that no one was home. Tears were streaming don my face as I made my way to my bedroom. I sat on the edge of the bed  in deep thought. Why do I have to be so ugly? Fat..worthless..stupid? I feel so alone-my friends..suggested we stop hanging out. I’m not a lesbian by the way. I may be a tad bisexual but so what? I’m not fully gay. And to anyone who IS gay, don’t be ashamed. My brain was clouded with thoughts. I screamed out in frustration and practically tore apart my room. Stuff was strewn out all over the floor. I grabbed my set of big blades and walked into the bathroom and locked the door.
“This..is for being worthless.” I slowly, steadily swiped the blade across my sensitive skin and watched the blood trickle down my arm. It felt..good?
“For being fat and ugly.” This time, I swiped it right across, quickly. I started cutting years ago.. Â I continued with a few more cuts then stood up angrily, throwing the sharp, big blade across the bathroom. I got up to the cabinet and pulled out my grandma’s pain killers..pills. I placed my hand on the cap and pushed it down, the hot tears stinging my eyes. I was about to do it.
“I’M HOOOOME!” My sister’s loud shout echoed through the house. I fiercely began wiping my tears and threw the bottle of pills back into the cabinet. Picking up the blade, pricking myself in the process, I sprinted into my room and hid it.
“Hey, where are you?” She called. I managed to choke out a reply.
“Here! I’m changing..” I looked down and realized my arm was still dripping with blood. I grabbed a bunch of paper towels and dried my arm. Pulling out my bracelets, I covered my arm. From then on, I wore bracelets. Sillybands from time to time but that would always cause dreadful, painful scars on my arms…I like it. I was SO..close.