Problems…

I really really want to fucking suicide. Okay, maybe not. Cause I’m scared of death. But I can’t take it any longer. I want to cut, I want to die. To people who cuts themselves, you do know what it’s like right?… How great the feeling is. I really don’t know what to do… All the night fights I have with my boyfriend is driving me insane. I just feel that my soul is trapped. And that I yearn for a razor to cut my skin. The scars actually seemed beautiful on my hand. HAHA. But people looked. They stare. They Judge. I want to die. I really want to. I don’t know. Should I break or should I stay with him? I love him more than anything. And if I let go of him, I don’t know what I’d become. I may just feel like suiciding… But the thing is.. He said to me yesterday that “I don’t think you have ever loved me” and that stab me right at my heart because IM THE ONE WHO LOVES HIM SO MUCH. But he said that… There’s so much between us. We have fights everyday and stuff. He almost mentioned a break and I almost die. I really don’t know what to do?…