Well, I’ve been bullied for more than 11 years, 8 of them were really worse. It started all at primary school at the age of 4. For the first in my life I went to school. But after a while my classmates didn’t wanted to play with me any more, or I had the ‘not-populair’ role. When we had to play outside, I played usually alone. Not because I didn’t wanted to play with them, but how hard I tried, they didn’t wanted to play with me. This all may seem very innocent to you, but it was the beginning of all the problems I have right now. Every year I had the same class with the same people, and it got worse and worse. From ignoring me till beating me up. Some things they did: beating me up, being against me with 25 people, calling me names (like: fat, ugly, loser, fat pig, ***** and so on, to make clear: I wasn’t fat in that time, I actually had underweight), follow me home, and more terrible things. My teachers didn’t believed me, even not if I showed them my bruises. My parents didn’t knew the situation was this bad, I didn’t told them because I wanted to ease them (they know now for 4 months). At that time I didn’t realized as an 12-years-old girl that this wasn’t normal. After those horrible 8 years I went to secondary school. I thought everything would change, but a friend of my told everyone in the class that I wasn’t a nice person, not kind, not trustful and more things. My classmates believed her and didn’t took the time to know me. The whole story started again, but it wasn’t as bad as before. After 3 years I went to another location (you need to, so my classmates went to) and to another level, so I wouldn’t be in the same class. But still there were some people that teased me in a not flashy way. Nowadays it has been 13 years ago since it all started, and everything still affects me. I’m afraid to go outside or to be in my village, I get really scared if someone trows something towards me, I’m really insecure about myself and my weight, I have constantly flashbacks, nightmares and hyperventilation attacks and more, I’m depressed and suicidal because of it, I cut myself, and a lot more. I don’t think people really do know how bullying affects someone’s life. I really hope the EMDR therapy will start soon (probably in 2 months) and that it’ll help me.
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Im sad to hear this story, anyone who goes through this.
I was bullied at one point to. Its horrible haw others can do it. As kids, they think its “cool” to do it.
Its great that you are starting therapy. I wish the best for you. Pray about it too.
You can find peace in doing things alone too, thats what got me through my period of bullying.
What I can tell you is that as you get older, the pain will ease, then go away.
Nowadays, I’m a big guy, so noone would even think of it. lol
But, don’t lt ruin you. It is bad, yes, but you can overcome it, and yes it will take time. It has no lasting effects on me because I didnt let it. You don’t either. OK? 🙂
I’m sorry, I also know how this feels and it is not pleasant. You have most likely heard this, but bullies are usually the people who feel threatened or intimidated themselves, therefore they take it out on other people. No one deserves this.
verbal abuse is also a form of bullying.
just ask my piranha. She was good at it.
Bullying really can destroy lives, and I guess most of the people on this forum have experienced similar things. I honestly feel sorry for you, bullying hurts us deep inside, especially as kids when we don’t yet know how to handle it. When we are young we strive for approval in our school and family and we’re naturally the most vulnerable to bullying. Like you I also did not tell my family about it but by now I have realized that this was probably one of the biggest mistakes I made in my life. As children we are just to young to deal with such a pressure and we don’t understand the impact this will have on our lives. Once the bullying happened you cannot undo it. Don’t let this ruin your life!
I know how it changes you and how hard it is to act like nothing happened and find new friends elsewhere. Try to find people who have experienced bullying themselves, they need friendship as much as you do, and unlike others they understand what bullying actually means. They don’t judge you for what others have done to you!
I really hope you will find someone who can help you get out of your misery and start to live your life! I have no experience with therapies, so maybe you will be able to share some of your thoughts about it, I would really appreciate it.
I am really sorry. I know how that feels. I really, really do. I didn’t tell my mother either. I couldn’t. But it still effects me too. It does get easier with time… and Willpower. You can’t let those Fuckers get the better of you. That lets them win. I tell myself that every day. I wont let myself be scared. I used to wake up before school, petrified, and I had to hide that terror… To go to school, knowing what awaited you there. It is the sort of thing that never leaves you. But you can channel it into something better.
Thank you all for the sweet and supportive comments. I feel like I’m not alone that made this through, when I read your comments. That’s a nice idea, and you all can give great advices. Thank you all. Remember all: stay close to who you are, it’s the only way to make yourself happy 🙂
I had the same problem im glad you’re taking therapy soon. You could send me an email, ( kekesem@gmail.com )’ll be your friend. :))
@keke_
I already had a lot of therapy (1,5 years now), but it wasn’t effective enough, and I hope that EMDR will help me to get rid of that huge blockade: a tough trauma. Not all of the therapists agree with the favt I’m going to get EMDR therapy, because they think I’m not stable enough. I honestly think I can’t get more stable than I am now, because of that trauma. All my therapies failed because of that blockade, so I think I first need to get rid of that trauma. Thank you for your comment.