all too much

I never realised how much depression effected me and everyone around me until i experienced it first hand. i’ve suffered from depression for over a year and i used to self harm and now im left with embarressing scares that leave something for people to talk about. Im slowly getting better but easily go back into the dark hole for a ffew days where i cant even try to act happy. I recently had a fight with my mother who attempted to hit me which has shaken me up for the past few days and created my mood to very dark.

I want to tell you about something that is effecting me most which is about a friend of mine. My bestfriend has broken up with her boyfrind of 3 years and its beginning to effect me, probabaly not nearly as much as her. The boy has been sending her messages every night saying he is going to kill himself and guilting her saying shes doing it to him. She tells me all this in hope i can help her but i just want him to leave her alone because its effecting our relationship because he will get angry when she hangs out with me. He began calling me and another friend of mine saying he will kill himself and that we have to help him but we try and try and he just doesnt listen to us. This has been going on for 4 months every night and its becoming too much for myself personally. He has scared me a lot because he is following her home and sitting outside her house and other obsessive actions. He pretended to drink nail polish to grab our attention at a party which i couldnt deal with and had to leave because i found it hard to breathe at a point because i thought it was the end. He never ended up apologising for the drama and it has began making me really angry because i know he isnt in a good condition but he doesnt care about anyone but himself and its hurting me my friend and our relationship. i want this to all stop. my friend has been self harming and it makes me cry to see it because i know she shouldnt but i cant do much about it. i recommended she saw a councellor which she is beginning soon. This is all too much for me.