Hi Guys,
Hi… Yeah so I know I said that these daily posts are going to be stopping, but then something changed my mind…. So I have decided I will do a weekly post. Either on Friday or Saturday….
How are you? Please comment down below… I do like to know… Thank you…
How am I? Physically: Sore Mentally: Exhausted
My physical state is just sore… I am completely exhausted… I didn’t get a lot of sleep this week… I had a lot of exhausting mental/physical break downs and about a panic attack a day… So go me… Um yeah I have a headache and I fell at school I think Wednesday… Maybe yesterday… Anywho I fell and I kind of bruised my side… *sigh* So that’s just great… I also went to the dentist today and the person who was cleaning my teeth bruised my gums… So that hurts a bunch…
My mental state is just crazy… My mind is filled with suicidal thoughts and plans… And questions and I just don’t know much. I don’t really know anything about the future. I don’t know who cares for me. Who really loves me. Who will really be there. And this just worries me. I feel like a big fat burden. I mean I depend on people so much. I just have to… I mean I guess I could try going alone for a week or so… Just lying like really lying not half lying but fully lying to everyone about everything… But who knows what would happen if I did that?
So here’s a poem thing…
Is there anything I can do?
To help you?
Is there anything I can do?
To comfort you?
Is there anything I can do?
To love you?
Is there anything I can do?
To care for you?
I want to help.
I need to help.
Please let me help.
Au Demain… Well kind of…
2 comments
Shitty.
I’m sure you’re not a burden. Like, family? And people here?
If you feel like a burden, you can find things to do around the house. For awhile I felt worthless because I’m practically unable to get a job, but till summer I think it suffices to do my homework for school and do things around the house as I can. You can do all kinds of things to distract yourself during bad times: I play the piano and electric guitar, as well as writing both fiction and factual things. By factual things I mean replies to online posts I feel I ought to reply to for social or political activist reasons: Even if you can’t necessarily do anything for your family or friends/acquaintances, you can still speak out against bigotry and other social ills. It changes you when you realize, we’re all in this together, and we can either pull through together or get fucked by our own selfishness.