It’s been a week or 2 since I lasst posted, but I figured I would give you all an update. That is, if anyone cares.
So I went to the state tournament. And won, then lost, then won again. At this point, I was one match away from placing in my state tournament. Tough kid I had to take, but I was confident. Anyways, 3, 2, 1, wrestle! So we did, and I was winning for a time, then he got desperate, and I ended up losing.
After that, I cried for a bit. (I know I know, men don’t cry, but since I am now a retired wrestler, I have the excuse). And that was it. People were so proud of me, yet, I wanted nothing more than to place.
Among other things, life is the same. It’s amazing how great things can happen to you, yet at the end of the day, you still feel depressed. Like trapped, nothing matters, like one day you’re going to lose the war, you know? No matter what happens, why try? Why even try to succeed in life, if at the end of the day, you’re going to feel useless, empty, and unlovable? That’s a question I can not answer.
Hope everyone had a great Valentine’s day.
2 comments
i just want to say i know exactly how you feel about how goof things happen and yet you still feel so trapped, so lost, so dark inside. i feel like that all the time.
i hope you had a good valentines day too!
Im sorry you didnt place :s
next time!
just know you’re not alone.
and Im always here if you wanna talk.
good* oops