I have become a caffeine addict for the reason that it is easier to tell myself that the unrest and disquiet I feel comes from a chemical stimulus rather than that my own body is unable to chemically stabilize itself. Â It, so far, is keeping me alive. Â Maybe if I can lie to myself, tell myself that this urge to cut, to die, is due to me drinking too much coffee, then I can stay here a little longer?
share your suicide story
Report Post
Please log in to report posts
3 comments
I’m addicted to coffee as well. I drink it all the time. It’s not such a bad thing though. Coffee is generally beneficial to health.
I love the smell of coffee in the morning…*sniffs*…smells like…victory…
Caffeine was discouraged in the military, “management” likened it to your average amphetamine and did not wish to see an entire Battalion of hopped-up psychopaths doting warlike ideals at all hours of the night. Energy drinks are steadily being discouraged too. They’re your best friend when conducting sentry duty, but not smiled upon by more traditional soldiers.
“Perhaps my long black could compliment your short white?” – Ick, the lengths some creeps will go to when wanting to lay some pipe. Is nothing sacred any more?
I’m a caffeine addict, too. I use it to evade sleep. I hate sleep; it reminds me of death. I sure have an odd track record of failed suicide attempts for someone so afraid of death. I want to be alive as to avoid nonexistence, yet most of the time I want to die due to the emotional turmoil/isolation/anxiety.
I guess my education is like medicine for me. It’s spring break and i feel a billion times worse with a break in committments, though I was near working myself to death.
There’s gotta be somethimg worthwhile enough in human life–or there would be no humans. We just have to figure out what that is and strive toward it with tenacity.